The Flyboy (Kes)

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

Kiimi never noticed Joey's lapse because she too was hanging on to the glimpse of passing eye-candy. That was her. Always looking, and never really doing anything else past that. Ugggh...

"Oh! Um...jyeah."

Dammit. Kiimi was eyes forward again, and she feigned sudden interest in buffing an imaginary dull spot on a jacket button with her thumb.

"Dojing what jy-jy-jyou ljike. That'ss g-good."

She wasn't going to look back at her tail. She could feel the tuft fur standing on end with her embarassment.

"Oh look! The B-Bothan rr-rrestaurrant, therre we arre!"

[Joey Rabeak]

"At least I can do what I like, here," Joey replied. "Home sector would be a bit more restrictive on that."

He was saved from immediate explanation by their arrival at the restaurant.

You have reached your destination. A little voice sounded in Joey's head, and he allowed himself a smile at the thought. Navigating Jovan was going to take some time for him to learn, he could already tell.

"Mmm, smells good," he said as he opened the door for Kiimi. Once inside, the smells were even better. Grilled and roasted meats appeared to be the core of a Bothan menu, and Joey's pink eyes widened as he read the sign "All you can eat." Sure, it was a little expensive, but after so many months of meal cubes and other synthetic proteins, he was ready for some real meat. A server led them to their table, where a menu was merely a formality before servers arrived with swords stacked with various meats, and trays of sides. Before he knew it, Joey's plate was full, and his stomach was rumbling with anticipation. "I think that ought to do it for a first course," he grinned across the table at his guide. "You come here often?"

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

Alien smells assailed Kiimiti's nose, and she tried not to imagine the kind of fire hazard the open hearth kitchen presented for everyone on the station. Where did the smoke go? She thought, nervously kneading the hem of her jacket with her claws.

Here and there, servers brought cubes of browned remnants of something that was once meat on swords. Swords. What if a server fell and impaled herself? Kiimi's eyes went wide at the thought as the host seated them at a table. Arrayed around a plate were a myriad of utensils. She knew that forrda used them when dining, but it didn't take a lot of imagination to portray them as weird torture devices.

"Huh?" She startled. He'd said something, but some sizzling danger had passed close to her head and she'd been to busy pivoting her ears away from it.

[Joey Rabeak]

"I asked if you come here often," Joey repeated. "Great suggestion, by the way. I was almost worried we'd wind up at one of those vegan health food ultra-sanitary places." The Nehantite laughed. "Though, if you'll permit me..."

He didn't explain before wrapping the fingers of one paw over the loose fist of the other and he bowed his head before whispering a short, quiet prayer in the rapid and lyrical tongue of his home kingdom. Prayer complete, and food blessed, he looked back up with that same excited grin he'd been wearing most of the morning, then took up a steak knife and a fork before starting in on one of the three different types of steaks on his plate. A perfectly medium-rare morsel was popped into his mouth, and no sooner had his lips closed than its juices were spread across his tongue, and the Nehantite's eyes closed in unison with a moan of pure delight. Sharp teeth made short work of the perfectly seared flesh, and he swallowed, already starting to cut another bite.

"Oh, Garfife, this is good!"

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

"Good! jI m-mean...good."

Kiimi winced, trying not to watch Joey eat. This was fine, it was all fine. She placed her hands in her lap, then rose them quickly to ward off the server as he tried to slide a sizzling portion onto her own plate.

"N-n-n-n-n-no th-thank jyou, jI'm on d-d-d....dutjy."

Goddess thats the lamest excuse, just act natural! Kiimi strained a little smile, and played with her hair a little to act casual.

The Bothan waiter ruffled the fur at his muzzle, glancing back to Joey in puzzlement.

"Something to drink then, miss?"

She could feel her ears reddening. Kiimi reached to the drinks menu, glancing at things she'd never seen before.

"That one. A B-Botha Ljibrre. Vjirrgjin Botha L-Ljibrre."

The Bothan looked at her like she had mynocks crawling out of her ears.

"You want...a cola and lime?"

Kiimi clasped her hands together on her plate, flinching as her silverware clattered.

"Y-y-y-yess. Pleasse."

"Okay then, sure thing..."

He gave Kiimi a funny look, then turned to Joey.

"And you, sir?"

[Joey Rabeak]

The awkwardness of the situation was not lost on Joey as he realized Kiimi's plate was still quite empty. At first he wondered if she'd already had breakfast, but then came the excuse, which was only more awkward.

Glancing up to the waiter, Joey replied, "Just a, uh, unsweet iced tea, please."

The waiter simply nodded before heading back to the bar. Joey paused, looking at Kiimi as if trying to piece together some invisible puzzle. "You... can't eat when you're on duty?" he finally asked, his voice packed with all the incredulity that the question deserved.

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

"Not exactljy," Kiimi grimaced, "jit'ss m-m-morre that, um, rrecent ss-sstudjiess p-pojint to charrred m-m-meat asss a posssjible ljink to c-c-colorrectal cancerr. And encephelop-p-pathjic sspongjiforrm d-d-djissorrderr."

But no, it's fine, tootally fine. Go ahead and eat your poison. Oh Goddess I'm practically a murderer!

[Joey Rabeak]

Joey blinked. That was not the answer he was expecting, and he hadn't expected to find a Cizerack officer who was a hypochondriac. All he could do was simply nod at that and begin cutting another piece of steak. "Well, my last rectal screening showed all clear, and I have no idea what that second thing is, so I think I'm just going to take my chances and enjoy this delicious steak."

It was only as he was chewing that the obvious question came to him, and he swallowed before asking, "If you don't eat meat, why did you suggest a meat restaurant?"

Surely she hadn't mistaken him for a Bothan, had she? Nah, that'd be racist, and from all the racial sensitivity training courses he'd had to take at the Academy, Joey knew that such pettiness was beneath an officer working with the Alliance.

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

"What? Of c-courrsse jI eat meat. jI, uh...jit'ss the p-p-prreparratjion that'ss at jissue."

Kiimiti nervously fiddled with the - what was this called - fork, twirling it between her fingers.

"And honesstljy, jit'ss fjine. Forrejign cujissjiness arre full of rrjisskss, dependjing on who'ss eatjing what, jI guesss."

[Joey Rabeak]

"Well, I only know two things for sure, right now," Joey chuckled. "One, cooked meat's safer and tastier than raw, and two, this is a hell of a lot better than meal cubes."

With that he dug in, grateful that his teeth - perfectly clean, polished and white - were designed to make short work of meat, which allowed him to clear his plate with great expediency. Well, that and his stomach was begging for all the real food he could get. Oh, sure, he'd weigh a bit more at check-in, but it was totally worth it. The waitress returned with yet more meat, and Joey selected two cuts he hadn't tried yet, knowing that would cap off his meal. As he ate, he talked about life at the Academy, and asked a few more general questions about Jovan, but the biggest question was saved for last, once his plate was totally empty.

His pink eyes had been taking sidelong glances at the dessert menu, and at long last he picked it up. There, on the cover, printed in glossy, gorgeous detail, was a huge slice of seven-layer chocolate cake, with fudge frosting, and drizzled in bittersweet chocolate sauce and salted caramel sauce. Biting his lower lip, he turned the image to show Kiimi. "Wanna split one? My treat. There's no way I could handle a whole piece like that by myself."

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

The Preita'rrou's mouth pressed into a thin-lipped expression of concern as she read the description. Okay, she knew what chocolate was, she'd had that before on Syragor. Fudge frosting and caramel though? She tugged at an ear in indecision.

"jI don't ssee anjy d-d-djissclajimerrss about adv-v-verrsse health jisssuess forr cerrtajin sspecjiess..."

Come on, Kiimi. Woman up already! Don't look like such a wet-ear in front of the Shiny.

She got a little iron in her spine at the thought. Chin up, Kiimi set aside her menu.

"jYou know...therre'ss n-no documented hjisst-t-t-torrjical orrjigjin worrld forr ch-ch-chocolate. jIt sshowss up jin Rr-Rrepubljic arrchjivess almosst thrr-thrree thoussand jy-jyearrss ago, but asss an esst-t-tabljisshed sst-taple of galactjic c-cujissjine. Mandalorrjianss c-c-call jit kjikvalat."

[Joey Rabeak]

Joey watched as Kiimi hemmed and hawed, regurgitating factoids which might have been interesting to hear between commercials in a holovision snow, but didn't answer his question.

"Well, is that a yes, then?" he asked, that eyebrow going up again as he smiled. Food was often the thing he'd found to work best while breaking the ice with anyone, and he prayed it worked on the Cizerack as well as it did the rest of the galaxy.

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

Her mind was made up. No way she'd let the Shiny get the best of her.

"Ssurre. W-w-what the hell, rr-rrjight?"

Kiimiti sipped on her virgin cocktail through the straw, as if sugar and bubbles might shore up her resolve.

"Sso jy-jyou'rre frrom Nehantjissh, huh? Th-that'ss a non-f-f-federrated worrld, sstjill djivjided jinto aut-t-t-onomouss rregjionss?"

[Joey Rabeak]

"Yeah, the five kingdoms, as we refer to them," Joey replied before the waiter returned and he placed his order for the positively sinful-looking cake.

"Though, not all are actually kingdoms," he clarified. "In fact, only three are, and even those have a sort of breakdown of democratic structure. The kingdom of Nehantish is the most advanced and powerful of them all, and because of that we get to represent for our world. Nehantish is also the only kingdom to directly align with the Alliance. Then there's Midloth, which is a democratic coalition of states, and they're affiliated with the Alliance by trade only, with no military interaction. Munjesh is sort of run by a Raj, and they're up-and-coming in tech, but for the most part are still fairly well behind the times in terms of skills and education. They have no affiliation with any major off-world political association. The Cathay Empire is secretive, and is technically run by an Emperor, but from most people's understanding they have a sort of representative government in place to really run things day-to-day. They're actually aligned with the Empire, but it's only for trade that they conduct off-world. Empire ships are not allowed in Nehantite space. And, then there's the 'kingdom' of Kuf, which is a backwater hellhole of jungle, desert, and what civilization it can boast today is almost entirely the mining and production camps set up there by th other kingdoms. Kuf is a mostly tribal, raw land, and other than minerals and raw materials, it's worthless to the rest of the world."

In the time it took for him to explain, the impossibly calorific cake had been cut and slathered with its black and gold toppings, appearing on a wide plate specially designed for the massive dessert. And massive it was, having been cut from a cake that had to be at least fourteen inches tall, causing immediate regret in Joey's stomach as he'd underestimated its sheer scale.

"Woah," he said, blinking at their dessert. "That's way bigger than it looked in the picture."

He then looked up to Kiimi, and realized there was no way he could back out of this. He'd ordered, he'd committed, he had to see it through. What would she say to Commander Akiena if their newest pilot couldn't even finish half a slice of cake? His career might be essentially ended just as it began. No, he had to do it. He had to eat his cake.

Taking up knife and fork, he grinned to Kiimi. "So, you start from your end, I start from mine, and we meet in the middle?" It was more a challenge than a question, as he doubted either of them would willingly eat that much cake for the sheer fun of it.

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

A little education built up an appetite for dessert, even if it was something alien and unknown. Kiimi hoisted her fork like a novice, but she didn't look like she was about to retreat from the prospect any more.

"We w-w-would ssajy Anaa'i hauu'ech-cheei. Head forr jy-jyou and tajil f-f-forr me."

And with that, Kiimi took the plunge, her fork pushing it's tines into the side of the pie a bit forcefully, rattling the plate. Her ears flinched, and Kiimi tried more carefully, prying away a bite of white fluff and shades of brown. It was probably rude to sniff a gift offering before eating, so the Preita'rrou simply let it slip past her lips. A bit of whipped cream daubed into the cleft of her upper lip, but she couldn't be bothered as epicurean ecstasy overtook her expression and she closed her eyes.

[Joey Rabeak]

Joey's own fork scarcely scraped the plate as he cut away what was honestly too big of a bite, yet his own pride wouldn't let him alter it. Thanking Garfife for his big mouth, the Nehantite shoved his forkful in and bit down.

Regret was immediate.

It was not regret for the quality of the chocolate used, as it seemed absolutely real, not was it regret for the overall balance of flavor, as the bittersweet chocolate sauce balanced well against salted caramel and the light, vibrant whipped cream. It was regret because the whole thing was far, far richer than he'd imagined, and he immediately worried about his ability to finish his half of the cake. As he chewed, the thick fudge icing stuck to his tongue, coating it in the sinful, luscious flavor of smooth chocolate enriched by butter, and it was fantastic. Iced tea did poor work of breaking up any of it, or clearing his palate, so he soldiered on. The cake was delicious, simply scrumptious, but also appeared to be more than enough to satisfy four, maybe five people. He could practically hear the waitstaff laughing at them from the kitchen as the duo attempted the culinarily impossible.

"Mmf, this is good," he said once his mouth was empty again. "I haven't had anything like this in years!"

There was no way he was going to show his weakness. No, a new pilot could not, and would not be defeated by a piece of cake, especially in front of an officer who reported directly to the station commander. Cake would be eaten, even if it was the death of him!

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

Syragori sweetmeats had nothing on this. Preita'rrou Taassaurra's blue eyes dilated in the throes of sugary ecstasy.

Kiimi gracelessly took the second bite, nearly skewering her tongue on the unfamiliar utensil. She powered on. Another bite. Another. Ugh Goddess, this was nearly better than baau'tai raau, but in a much larger quantity.

Stuffing one's face full of cake also had the added perk of not being compelled to speak. Trading social anxiety for an avenue into obesity probably wasn't a long-term winner, but Kiimi was all about the cake, no talking right now.

[Joey Rabeak]

Alarm klaxons of worry sounded inside Joey's head as he watched his Cizerack liaison attacking the cake with a vengeance. She was trying to beat him, he could tell. The intent stare, the rapid assault of her fork, and her priority of food over talk could only mean one thing: she aimed to beat him to the punch.

Well, not if he could help it! Joey Rabeak was not going to be shown up by a desk jockey!

His own fork moved faster now, cutting away bites of cake, sauces, and fudgy icing in his attempt to keep pace. Stomach already full of beautifully grilled and roasted meats and sides, he knew it was a fool's errand to complete his half of the cake, but this was war! Already he could feel the sugar rush flowing through his bloodstream, making him both hyper and sleepy simultaneously, but he would not give in, no matter how sick he was going to feel after it all. In the board game of life, Joey couldn't help but feel he had rolled a 1, and was putting all his bluff points to work in order to try and get out of it relatively unscathed.

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

It took a bit of mental focus to remember to not bite the fork. The first two chance encounters between tooth enamel and durasteel weren't the pleasant sort. Still, Kiimi made certain to press her lips together upon withdrawal of the fork, making sure every last bit of caramel and sweet fluff stayed in her mouth where it belonged. This much sugar in a short amount of time on a more-or-less empty stomach was having an effect on the Preita'rrou in more than a few ways. Her ears were perked, pupils dilated. She could feel her heart thumpthumpthumping from her chest to her ears and back, all the while her stomach was flipping over itself.

"jI g-g-guess thjiss rratess asss a p-p-prrettjy bjig b-brreakfasst forr jyou, huh?"

One of Kiimi's knees began to bob up and down in a rapid cycle of restlessness. She set aside her fork, opting to trace the boundaries of the plate where a bit of errant caramel and whipped cream had separated itself.

"Hope jyou'rre g-good forr the ssquadrron b-brrjiefjing. Prrobabljy d-don't want a casse of the blood n-napss forr jyourr fjirrsst d-dajy."

[Joey Rabeak]

"Heh, don't worry, we Nehantites have a fast metabolism," Joey chuckled. Bluster and lies, but with a confident face to cover for it. Laden with so much meat and cake it would be a miracle if he didn't get sick on maneuvers within ten minutes. Hopes and dreams remained pinned on being able to delay the squadron commander juuuuust long enough for his meal to fully settle before he'd have to strap in to the cockpit of his X-wing.

That was the scenario which continued to run through his head as he worked steadily at his cake while Kiimi began to mock him by making sure to also add any errant sauce or whipped cream to her main course of cake. The subtle jab did not go unnoticed, and Joey redoubled his efforts, knowing he only had a few agonizing, soul-destroying bites left. After this, he'd be swearing off chocolate for an entire month, he told himself as the end was in sight, though there still existed the danger that his chaperone would beat him to the finish line.