Lachrimae

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

in orbit over syngra




Her office was dim, lit mostly by the illumination of the projected image over her desk. It was mostly the normal fair of her evenings; reports, documents that needed her signatures via the linked datapads that she had scattered around before her. A solitary drink rested off to the side, only touched once as her thoughts and efforts were mostly concentrated on the tasks ahead. Approving the roster changes that had been sent to her, finalizing munitions orders, checking crew requests... it was all enough to take up the majority of the evening, stretching it into a night of quiet work. She would most likely not see her own bunk for another few hours.

Leaning back in her seat, the Lupine felt her body tilt further as the chair rocked back ever-so-slightly on its pivot. She released a long breath, closed her eyes, and let her head fall against the headrest. She was tired, but it was not the normal bone-aching exhaustion that she was used to. It was something much more akin to content tiredness, with the knowledge of peace even if for just this moment in time. Her body still felt stiff at times, but it was ebbing away with time. If she was lucky, Knight Vissica would heed her warning and refrain from future incursions of the mind.

Khera'Va'ss'io was two days out from their resupply drop on Jovan, where she'd spoken with the Selonian. It had ultimately been a futile and wasted effort, as the Knight was still adamant in her intentions. The only thing that s'Il could do now was hope. Hope that a seed of any sort was planted.

Other thoughts pushed inward then, and she moved on from the Selonian. Shifting to memories much closer to home, as it were. Teagan, Markos, Zem. Her family. Hers. Whatever she had done to deserve such a thing... it was lost. She could in no way divine the reasons for such fortunes to be given to her. And yet, she held tight all the same. A second chance, and one that she would never let go.

Again the thoughts moved, running along tangents until the stopped at one that resurfaced with a fair enough bit of regularity.

Arya.

The Loveloxx had been returning to the forefront of her awareness more often than not, and s'Il had - in the past - tried to reach the other Lupine with the comm number she had known was Ravenwing's.

It was never answered. Many times she simply let it ring for as long as she could. Each time, there was no one to answer the call.

Another long exhale, and s'Il reached forward, her fingers shooing away the current document on the holoprojector. Fingers swiftly dialed a frequency number that she had long ago memorized. It was a number that had never been answered, but habits tend to make one persist, and Captain Loklorien s'Ilancy collected a great many persistent habits.

A trill, as the frequency began to call out into the void for the answer it always hoped for.

[Arya Ravenwing]

“Fuck, there’s another one!”

Arya dove to the ground, arms outstretched as a small furry creature scurried down the passage in front of her. The short legged rodent squirted through her fingers and dashed toward a newly chewed hole in the base of a bulkhead. She scrambled after it, running into the wall just after the creature disappeared.

The smuggler groaned, resting her face on the bulkhead and listening to the rodent scurry away. “Remind me why I decided bringing live cargo on board was a good idea?”

”I believe you said it was the money, Captain Arya,” came Twopio’s precise voice from behind her. “Trying to bring these ‘gallo pigs’ to Jovan Station for the Cizerack t-“

”Troops yes, I know,” she wearily finished for him.

”They do not appear to be pigs, of course, the name is quite deceptive.”

”And their crate was quite easy to break. Especially if you’re a curious Cizerack who thought he could just sneak one out!” The last bit was shouted up the passageway to where she was sure Jaas could hear her. “And now they’re all over my damn ship, godsdammit that’s my comm.”

She pulled herself to her feet and stomped over to her cabin, checking the seat for a gallo pig before sitting at her desk. She answered the call while scanning the room for rodents.

”HelloohmyGODS JAAS GET IN HERE!” Arya grabbed a creature that had it’s fat butt sticking out of the top of one of her other boots, little legs wiggling as it tried to crawl all the way in. When she sat up and returned into frame for the call her face was flushed and she was holding the gallo pig in both hands.

[Jaassuuvi Ageerrodarr]

"I SAID I WAS SORRY!"

His voice preceded the towering Cizerack before he stomped into sight. His clothing was dirty and ripped from reaching and crawling into tight spaces to retrieve the many wiggling bodies that were pinned between his arm and chest. There was no mistaking the smile on his face for anything else. He saw the look on Arya's face and shook his head nervously. As much as he wanted to eat the little creatures, he was having just as much fun chasing and catching them. This must be how farmers felt when they harvest their crops. So much hard work for a meal.

"But really, look at these things? You can't look at them and not want to eat them. Look at the little feet, I bet they're crunchy!"

The armload was dumped into a repurposed crate and the lid hastily replaced over the top. The air holes had been drilled very finely so that the little morsels wouldn't squeeze out again. Seriously, how was he supposed to know they could fit their bodies through such a small home. All he wanted was a nibble, not even a whole gallo pig.

[Dietre san Luthgarde]

In each broad hand were two Gallo pigs, clutched tight by their rear legs. Following Jaassuuvi, Dietre was more fascinated by all of this than anything else. It was like the days of his youth, when he and his friends would chase rock-jumpers and cliff goats in the Ov'ied Mountains. It was enjoyable even, and he'd taken to the task of catching as many as he could with a peculiar sense of gusto.

"It is fun, to chase dem. I do not know why you are givink de words of sorrow," his voice rumbled low, not understanding why Jaassuuvi would possibly need to apologize.

One hand lifted two of the small creatures up to inspect them, and he playfully blew in their faces.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

The answer that she never thought would come. In the midst of sipping her drink, the sudden flash of the holo flared to life, rendering the upper portion of Arya Ravenwing in all of her flustered glory. A far cry from the dour, dark-haired woman, she appeared visibly agitated. There were others behind and out of the frame, but their voices hardly registered as s'Il blinked furiously.

The elder Lupine surged forward, her glass quickly being replaced on her desk as her eye traveled over the other woman.

"Cousin?!"

[Arya Ravenwing]

She was handing the gallo pig to Jaas when it registered who was calling her. Arya dropped the rodent before her first mate got his hands on it, and it scurried between his legs and out the door of her room.

Loklorien s’Ilancy.

A surge of emotions washed over her, remembering (https://theholo.net/forum/showthread.php?20766-Nau-ravi(Arya-and-Co-)) when she’d seen Lok’s face last. The infestation of her ship was forgotten as Arya leaned into the camera.

”Holy shit. Is it really you?” Her next question tumbled out quickly. “How is Tak?”

[Jaassuuvi Ageerrodarr]

It hardly seemed the time for a personal comm right now, but Jaas was not about to risk his neck saying anything. He knew better. It would get turned back around at him for creating the situation they are in. He allowed himself to merely grumble under his breath as he ducked around Deitre and chased the little bugger out the door and into the corridor. It didn't make it far. The dumb little creature ran right into the corner where it had nowhere to go. No matter how many times it shoved it's little head into rivet holes and cracks there were just not quite big enough.

Grabbing the squirming mass and he poked it's little belly and made it squeal. Returning to the doorway he stuck his head inside to address the rest of the crew.

"If I buy a few will you guys eat it? I'll even cook it if you want. Dee?"

[Dietre san Luthgarde]

The thought of food was enough to snap his eyes away from the holo of the other woman and over to Jaassuuvi with a hint of an expectant glint in his eyes. Food? Not only that, but fresh food?! As if he'd only just understood what the small creatures were for, Dietre again held up two of his prizes.

"Dese are food?"

He stared at the little things with new thoughts of putting them on a plate.

"Yes. Yes, buy dem. All of dem. We will be makink de feast, yes?"

Moving away from Arya and once more to the doorway, the Luthgarde Lupine could already feel the first pangs of hunger; whatever it was that he'd eaten earlier (he'd been told it was an instant nuna pot pie... whatever that was), it had not been very good.

"It will be of de better meat dan de... pot pie, I think."

Moving to stand beside Jaassuuvi, his voice lowered.

"De pot pie, it was very... kheh'seh'a... ugly in de mouth."

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

Whatever was going on behind Arya was ignored, and s'Il focused on the other woman.

"Teagan is well, and living on Ossus with the Jedi."

A moment of pause, and she went on to finish.

"Her and her brother both."

And yet, there were many of her own questions that demanded to be asked, and she found herself sliding closer to the edge of her seat, as if the act of doing so would bring the two women closer.

"But I... you... " How to even ask? The muscles of her jaw clenched and she felt a wash of shame dampen her initial shock and elation.

"... I couldn't find you," she finally finished, her voice lowering a level.

"I'm... sorry."

[Arya Ravenwing]

Arya got up abruptly, put her hands on Dietre's back and shoved him and Jaas all the way out and into the passage. Before either could speak she mashed the door controls, sealing them out. Returning to her seat, she sat on the edge of it.

"Not your fault." The Loveloxx Lupine ran a hand through her short black hair and then clenched her fists in her lap. "Turns out Kessel isn't the shithole place you imagine it might be.

"It's worse."

After a moment Arya smiled, trying to alleviate the tension. "You had another kid? That's amazing. Congrats!"

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

For a moment she allowed a smile of thanks, her head dipping to acknowledge the words spoken. But, finally regrouping and easing herself back into her seat, s'Il let out a long breath that seemed to rattle and shake its way up from her lungs and out from between her teeth.

"He is a strong boy," she offered, traces of her earlier smile still showing.

At a loss for what to say next, the Lupine pursed her lips. For so long she had called the frequency number without answer, and it had become a ritual in its own right, so that when Arya finally did answer, the reasons for her calls had suddenly vanished.

Instead, she clung to what the Loveloxx Lupine had said, hoping to divine the past and what she'd been unable to rectify.

"Kessel."

A terrible place.

"I am glad that you are away from there now, Cousin. But, you are safe, now?"

[Arya Ravenwing]

"Safe as ever." Historically that had never been very safe.

"The bounty hunters took me back to Imperial Intelligence. I guess, you should know that." Arya indicated Loklorien's uniform. "They have my DNA. They've had it for a while. But I don't think they've been able to do anything with it. I think that's why they dumped me on Kessel."

The hallway beyond her door was full of thumps and bumps, and she studiously ignored them.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

The mention of Imperial Intelligence was enough to cause a frown to mar her features, and s'Il felt her features darken.

"Ah yes, them. I have had dealings in part with them, as well as with the Knights."

She shook her head as if the motion would cast their very presence from existence.

"Apparently they have an old journal of mine, from before the Clone Wars."

[Arya Ravenwing]

"They must be starting a collection of them." Arya remembered her own mother's journal, now in R. S. Esalis' hands. The bizarre text inside was written in what she now knew was the ancient Lupine language, which she had taught herself years ago. Not that even translated it had made much sense ...though it had led her to Dietre.

A squeak caught her ear, and Arya's arm flashed downward, snatching up an errant gallo pig. She sat it on the desk, holding it firmly but gently, and its nose twitched as it settled down.

"Thankfully I don't believe in leaving a paper trail." She grinned wolfishly.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

So. Esalis had taken on a penchant for old writings of a particular style. Unsurprising. At lease Knight Vissica had not found Arya's mother's journal. She hoped.

There was something else though, that warranted attention beyond the initial surprise of finally being able to find the Loveloxx.

"I have something, still... "

She could remember the note that she'd sent, the one that had brought them both to Sullust and the terrible confrontation that'd pulled them apart.

"... your medallion. I... keep it at home."

Of course, what home meant for her and what it meant for Arya were most likely two different things.

[Arya Ravenwing]

"What. What? That's what that note was about?!" One of Arya's hands, the one not holding a wriggly rodent, went subconsciously to her sternum, where her father's medallion used to hang.

"I thought about that frelling note so many times, wondering what the krasst you were talking about and it was the medallion? How did you get it? You've had it all this time?"

Arya was so distracted she forgot about the gallo pig and it ran off the side of her desk and plopped onto the deck, squeaking and ignored.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

"It is safe," she made sure that that bit of information was forefront.

"I found it with an Imperial, and... well... "

She gave a shrug.

"Well... I took the both of them from Coruscant."

There was of course so much more attached to the matter of Karrnage and her relationship to the scholar. It was a strange one, to say the least. But, he had proved trustworthy and even eager to stay on Schwartzweld, learning all that he could. She took pride in that.

"They are waiting for us," finally she reached for her drink, having neglected it for long enough.

"If you wish, that is."

[Arya Ravenwing]

"Yes, absolutely. Where?" Arya agreed almost before she'd finished hearing what Lok was saying, her ears catching up slowly. "Wait, you took an Imperial as well?"

Was it the former Executor, Sevon? There weren't many who might have had access to the medallion, but then again Esalis might have just given it away to who knows who.

On the floor the gallo pig righted itself and ran under a pile of clothes in the corner of her cabin.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

"He is no longer an Imperial," was the first thing she could think of to say. So much had shaped both her and Erasmus Karrnage; so much. What she had intended, and what had transpired. He'd been a curiosity at first, an experiment. And now he was something more. He was like them.

Her brow furrowed, and she let out a long breath.

"It is hard to explain over a comm," by the Bloodline that was an understatement, "... but I can show you, if you wish."

[Arya Ravenwing]

“Sure, whatever you want.” Arya didn’t understand but also didn’t much care. “Just name the time and the place.”

They might be able to swing by Jovan to try to sell the gallo pigs on the way - if Loklorien wanted to meet now. Soon was good, now was better.

Her father’s medallion! Arya couldn’t quite believe it.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

The words seemed almost strange to hear, but s'Il ignored the strange lackadaisical way in which they were spoken. She instead focused on an intention that she'd not expected to carry out when she first dialed Arya's comm number.

"Well, I'm not due to any ports for another few weeks," her mind cycled through the routine waypoints that her ship adhered to, per Alliance protocol.

"I can rendezvous with you at Bondan in... " she looked away then, reaching forward to grasp a flimsi, pulling it close so that she could review the schedule she'd been given.

"... two days?"

A huffed breath through her nose as the flimsi was returned to the polished surface of her desk.

"Once there, we can continue on to Schwartzweld, since the moons will be at their furthest points."

The last thing she needed was for some Leh'beni hunting party to disturb their arrival.

[Arya Ravenwing]

“Uh huh, okay.” Arya scribbled a note on a piece of flimsy.

“Bondan in two days. Got it. I could just meet you at this Schwartz-held if you want. What sector is it in?”

It sounded familiar, but she couldn’t quite place it.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

Her mouth opened without sound, teeth almost baring in warning. It was a strange sight, considering the nature of the woman she currently was talking to.

"It is too dangerous to go alone," she finally got out. There was a deep undercurrent of caution lacing her tone, and s'Il let her features fall into steely resolve.

"The rotations of the moons are key, and it would be best if we both arrived together."

There was no distrust; rather, it was a healthy amount of over-caustion that now reared its head.

"I can explain more once we're there, but please. Trust me now."

[Arya Ravenwing]

Arya's shoulders hunched a little as Lok started to bare her teeth. Even on a holocall her body language was easy to read. "That's fine. Bondan it is."

She forced a smile. "It will be good to see you, face to face."

They said their goodbyes, and Arya ended the call, sitting back heavily in her seat. There was nothing like being asked to trust someone to make doubt rear its ugly head.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

The holo blinked out, leaving her in the dim confines of her office once more.

She could remember the last time she had essentially asked Arya to trust her. But then, back in those days it was different. She was not herself and was certainly not the woman she was now. Now, she was whole. There was no soul split in two, and no mind pulled to the call of a poisoned man.

She reached for her drink, taking it up into her grasp. But, rather than partaking of its contents, the Lupine simply sat, holding it close like some precious treasure.

Two days.

Bondan.

Another few seconds passed, and she finally lifted the glass to her lips, taking a small sip.