Victoria Von Doom - Maliceous

[Victoria Von Doom]

Victoria Von Doom
Mistress Doom:: Near Human - Kissai - Experimental & Radical Science ::
Apprentice Priestess - Sadist
Currently in:


http://i.imgur.com/gOXH1Y4.jpg

-Later depiction of Lady Doom-




Character Background











Raw Material




Force Drain
Victoria can drain energies of other people and the surrounding areas.









Plot Ideas



My main leaning is to have Maliceous bring back the ancient sith cult of the Kissai.


Side Plotting: I’d love to eventually have Maliceous undergo Dathomirian Magic Training.


I’d like to eventually have a Rival or two Lined up for her. Maybe a Jedi that she comes into contact with? Or another apprentice she doesn’t approve of or doesn’t approve of her? Or maybe an Imperial Knight that literally has a hard on to find something to imprison her for? Idk, it’d be interesting nonetheless.


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Existing Relationships




Unless you’re another female she won’t be interested.


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Current Plots




[*=center]. Briefly explain a few current plots or threads. These might spin off into new plots and threads.
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Credit for the basic template goes to Dun ofRPG-D (http://rpg-directory.com/index.php?act=idx)

[Halajiin Rabeak]

(Psst, might want to set your text color to "Automatic," as black is impossible to read on most of the dark backgrounds in the themes here.)

[Kera Blacc]

Its black on your end?
Oops.

[Victoria Von Doom]

Strange.. Doesn't give me an option to change the text color, unless I've gone blind.

[Halajiin Rabeak]

(It's on the text options line, between "Size" and "Smileys." It's a black "A" with a drop-down. Highlight the text you want to change the color of and select "Automatic." That will make it legible to anyone, regardless of what theme they are using.)

[Victoria Von Doom]

idk.. its not there for me which is odd.

[Sianna]

When you edit, Go Advanced, that might help. Though "A" is on the regular posting window, so just click on that and it gives a drop down menu with the colors.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

If you're using our TheHolo.net address, sign into the SW-Fans.net address. That might help.

[Victoria Von Doom]

I'll look into it, thank you for your assistance. :)

[Victoria Von Doom]

Hows that?

[Halajiin Rabeak]

The same, and now awkwardly centered. You changed the font, but not the font color.

[Kera Blacc]

No clue why i cannot locate an "A" or menu option for "Automatic". I'll send a report to the staff about it I guess.

[Halajiin Rabeak]

You have apparently fixed it. Though it's still centered, which makes it difficult to read.

[Lilaena De'Ville]

I have fixed it for you. :)

[Kera Blacc]

Thank you. :)

[Victoria Von Doom]

damn I feel like an idiot now. Apparently I was blinded by the "text" options mixed in with the "color" settings. :D

[Matatek Sel Vissica]

A couple of things:

1. How old is your character?

2. It's tricky to link your characters to the Order of the Sith Lords, for fairly obvious reasons. The line of succession ended in Return of the Jedi (as well as our divergent timeline). Some characters here have had roots in that lineage, but it was more a case of a fork in the lineage (ex, in the case of Darth Decepis, Sith knowledge was stolen by a scribe). There are plenty of Sith holocrons and artifacts and texts, no doubt. I'd suggest that you look for an origin through some of the archaeology if you're looking to become a Sith of an independent pedigree.

2a. A bit of a continuation, but for clarity you mention Victoria was seduced by an unknown Dark Lord of the Sith. Again, this may prove problematic just because of our timeline and because of the nature of the Order. It might be interesting instead if you consider that she was influenced by a darkside adept, or someone in the periphery collecting these aforementioned sith table scraps. Maybe that compels her to not simply settle for a little bit of power, but to look for the dogma of the old ways. It gives you flexibility to either find a belonging in the Sith Order, or to strike out on your own and try and rekindle the Sith as you see them. The thing to remember here is that there are numerous divergent lineages of the Sith, especially since the Order of the Sith Lords is no more.

3. Clarification here, are you saying you are aspiring to Dathomiri witch training, or you have it already? It seemed a bit unclear. There are Dathomir witches here, so it's probably best to leave that as an opportunity. Interestingly enough, going down this path would almost certainly cross Victoria's story with one of the most powerful Sith lineages currently in play here.

4. The ages of Victoria's turning and betrayal seem a bit on the young side. It might not be a bad idea to age her up in these conflicts, to lend a bit more believability to them.

[Kera Blacc]

Interesting advice. I will look into it, never thought of certain complications that might arise from what I had added to it.
As for the Dark Lords Order? I'll need to do further research but I thought in pre-disney destructo of SW there were sith even far beyond the Return of the Jedi (eras) that were of that order.

and currently she aspires to obtain training to one day become a Nightsister. I loved that sorta part of canon and thought it might be neat to make an attempt at dual-affilation with both the Darkside Priesthood and the Nightsister Caste.

and no problem. I'll begin the research into it all and see how I can best improve upon what I already have written out. :) appreciate your advice and clarity on this.

[Halajiin Rabeak]

Charley makes some great points, here, but I'd also like to clarify a few things, so that you have a bit deeper understanding of why some of these are issues in our setting.

If your character is 17, as I believe I've read in another thread, then her mother could not have been an openly known Jedi at the time she was born. The Empire had a stranglehold on the galaxy at that time, and it wasn't until only a couple years ago that the Alliance and the Cizerack were able to form a proper defense and push them back. Naboo would have been in Imperial territory at that time, and Force users were basically hunted down and killed by the Inquisitors. Sith and open dark-siders suffered much the same fate, as any Force users were a threat to the Empire. While she could have received some instruction in secret, the timing of her turn, and the methods which she used would have likely brought the Imperial Inquisitors (basically the forerunner to the Imperial Knights, but not nearly as polite or non-lethal), would have been hunting your character down hard.

In general, we see a lot of ambitious power level goals in your plotters, but not much about actual character depth, or what drives them. Yes, baddies want power, and more power = scarier baddie in Cliche World, but this isn't Cliche World, and we'd like to get to know your character for WHO she is, not WHAT she is. At the moment, she comes across as a fanfic character already set on her way to OP levels of power simply for the sake of achieving power goals, and that makes it hard for any of us to know how to interact with her, or how to work with you to set up plots and scenes for your characters. If one of your goals is to be the most graceful whatever, explain to us why grace is so important for that role. That sort of thing.

We'd like to help, we really do, but the character needs to be the focus, first and foremost, and things also do have to work within our admittedly non-conventional timeline, as a great deal has already been developed. We'd be glad to answer questions and give suggestions, as we know ours is a different kind of board. My best advice is to not set out with specific powers in mind, or certain positions of power, and instead work up from the bottom, see how things operate and mesh with the system instead of cutting through it. It's more fun for everyone that way.

[Kera Blacc]

Now you're onto something here. And ya I get that, maybe it wasn't as thought out as I had originally thought.
I gotta run, will see what I come up with tomorrow. :D

[Kiimiti Taassaurra]

Yes, bingo on the characterization stuff. That is the real meat and potatoes here.

We want to know your character. To see them in our shared imaginary headspaces. That's more than a "I want to be powerful" statement, but rather what are their quirks and idiosyncrasies? It doesn't even necessarily have to tie into the "I want to be powerful" theme. Maybe they're afraid of bodies of water? Maybe they have a thing for collecting a rock on every planet they visit. It doesn't sound "big" but that sort of stuff is really fun to read when it's acted out.

I'll give an example with this current account. Kiimiti is a commissioned officer in the Cizerack Navy but she basically joined because they'd pay for school. She's a comms and xenolinguistic expert, but almost paradoxically she's got a speech impediment and doesn't really enjoy face-to-face social interactions. These things don't necessarily add up to a mission statement for her to become an admiral one day (maybe she will, maybe she won't!) but they give a reader of your plotter a really good idea of what kind of person they are.

[Akasha Khan]

Or to give an example of a character who's a bit closer to the lust for power archetype:

Akasha went from a princess in a minor feudal domain on a low-tech world to an exile sold into slavery. She probably would have died there if a Dark Jedi Knight hadn't witnessed her tapping into her latent Force abilities and stolen her away from her masters to become an apprentice. She's experienced what it means to be completely in someone else's power, and hates it. She wants to gain enough power to ensure that no one can ever use her again.

The thing is, she didn't get there immediately. She was taken to Onderon, where she quickly learned she was a novice among Dark Side adepts who would EAT HER ALIVE given the chance. She had to step quietly, pick her battles, and glean teaching wherever she could so that one day she could hold her own. At this point in her life, gaining power was a simple matter of survival.

Then, to her surprise and disdain, she was shipped off to the Jedi to pose as a padawan and spy on the newly organized Jedi Order. At first she was furious that her Dark Side training was going to be put on hold, but gradually she came to appreciate that the Jedi had things to teach her as well. Not only that, she was exposed to real friendship and compassion, which have had a profound effect on her. She still has her ambition, but now she has friends she values. Gaining power came to mean making sure no harm comes to the people she likes.

Her time with the Jedi is drawing to an end, which will force her to make a decision between pursuing power and keeping her friends. That split will ultimately cement her on the path to the Dark Side, and her journey will be deeper for it. On top of all that, there's been a split between her master, Lilaena De'Ville, and the ruler of Onderon, Salem Ave, and Ave made Akasha swear allegiance to him and ordered her to spy on De'Ville. Akasha still isn't certain where her loyalties lie, and is trying to play a dangerous double agent game that will probably blow up in her face.

I didn't have any of this planned out when I started Akasha's character. I just had some ideas about the kind of person she was, what motivates her, and what she fears. The rest came from collaborating with other people's characters and seeing where the story took her. Even if power is your character's motivation, it should never be your motivation as a writer - the quest for power, and all the desires bound up in that quest, and the people she encounters along the way and how they affect her, are where the real story lies. Often the more powerful your character is, the more limited you are in writing her, because her potential has already turned into reality. Writing a character from the very beginning of his or her journey is often the most rewarding roleplaying experience you can have.

Just my two cents! :cat

[Victoria Von Doom]

Well thank you all for your input. :)

To be brutally honest here I haven't done much in the way of writing since I left the other a few years ago. I've been wandering from one to another while at times gaming out to certan MMO's, so in a way I'm very rusty.. The opionated comment section helps greatly. :)

[Victoria Von Doom]

Alright made some alterations. Lemme know what everyone thinks. :)
And thanks once again for the support and the help with this. :D

[Matatek Sel Vissica]

Looks like the text went back to unreadable

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

I fixed it.

[Matatek Sel Vissica]

Lightning feels a bit OP for an apprentice without some serious drawback (like shocking yourself when using it)

As far as drain goes, it sounds like you've got a story on how to acquire the power, which I think you should explore, but it's also not something I'd expect to be within an apprentice's grasp without a lot of story behind it

[Kera Blacc]

oh wow. didn't notice that lol.

[Victoria Von Doom]

Change the way its worded by adding in the "lower" form of the ability. :)

[Darth Acera]

What are the drawbacks for this level of lightning.

[Victoria Von Doom]

She can fire off a single bolt or strand of energy with only enough power that it can only stun an enemy for a very brief duration of time?

[Halajiin Rabeak]

Then presumably it would take a certain amount of time or focus before she could fire off another, correct? About how long in actual, uninterrupted time would you say the cooldown interval would be? Also, from all I've seen, Force Lightning is a fairly close-quarters skill. About what is the effective range for her beginner level of it?

[Matatek Sel Vissica]

Here's an example:

Since lightning we can agree tends to be generally an advanced power, you could envision someone possibly doubling down an affinity for it at the expense of other disciplines. So VVD is a specialist in novice lightning, but that comes at the price of being deficient in another skill, such as having no telekinetic ability

[Darth Acera]

I think it's helpful to point out that while the ability for lightning is achieved rather early on in a game like TOR, we don't operate on that sort of structure here. We are probably to some considered oldschool, and very much more story and character oriented and less stat trees and the like. We want to see the story of how the powers were learned rather than seeing them instantly achieved.

[Victoria Von Doom]

Alright lemme try and answer the question without avoiding it alltogether. :)

1. The interval or cooldown would be about 4 alternating posts before she can even tap into the ability again.
2. The "range". Didn't think of that, I will need to remember there is an entirely different set of guidelines here.
3. The other community I was apart of allowed it to be a short distance, pretty much from one end of a corridor to another. So how about the distance that would grant to closely oppossing adversaries or duelists ?

[Halajiin Rabeak]

I think it's helpful to point out that while the ability for lightning is achieved rather early on in a game like TOR, we don't operate on that sort of structure here. We are probably to some considered oldschool, and very much more story and character oriented and less stat trees and the like. We want to see the story of how the powers were learned rather than seeing them instantly achieved.

This. So much this. To be blunt, your characters have seemed like min-maxed MMO game characters, while here we operate primarily around lore instead of action gameplay. I think that's a big part of the gap, here, between what you want for your character, and how we operate. Think most of all on the story, and powers are very much secondary here. Each board and group operates differently, and we understand that you are coming from a different structure. We'd like to be able to help integrate you into ours, and this difference in play style may very well be what's causing the confusion.

[Victoria Von Doom]

Currently the only ability she can tap into through her studies is the force drain, and even that has its limits. :)

[Kera Blacc]

Lightning feels a bit OP for an apprentice without some serious drawback (like shocking yourself when using it)

As far as drain goes, it sounds like you've got a story on how to acquire the power, which I think you should explore, but it's also not something I'd expect to be within an apprentice's grasp without a lot of story behind it



I think it's helpful to point out that while the ability for lightning is achieved rather early on in a game like TOR, we don't operate on that sort of structure here. We are probably to some considered oldschool, and very much more story and character oriented and less stat trees and the like. We want to see the story of how the powers were learned rather than seeing them instantly achieved.

This. So much this. To be blunt, your characters have seemed like min-maxed MMO game characters, while here we operate primarily around lore instead of action gameplay. I think that's a big part of the gap, here, between what you want for your character, and how we operate. Think most of all on the story, and powers are very much secondary here. Each board and group operates differently, and we understand that you are coming from a different structure. We'd like to be able to help integrate you into ours, and this difference in play style may very well be what's causing the confusion.

It is my plotter or yours? I list the abilities, and just because they are listed in it doesn't automatically make them already accessible or omnipotent. I know the restrictions and limitations as I have used them before on another.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

The plotter has many uses, one of which is to help those of us here see if you are able to make your character fit within the history and lore of what we have here. So far you seem to be having trouble with that. People pointing things out in your threads are not trying to pester you, they are trying to make sure that you're able to work within the established lore we have. These people have been here for over a decade, writing and collaborating with each other to tell stories and create the history we have here.

Plotters are living documents, and you are perfectly able to edit in learned abilities as time goes on and your character learns those things. I do it with many of my character's plotters.

As for limitations and restrictions, you may know them from your time on another board, but that was not here. The limitations and restrictions are not the same here. It's already been recommended that rather than list these powers straight off, you begin telling a story about how they were learned. I strongly suggest you do that.

[Victoria Von Doom]

its been edited. Will redo the back history in the coming days or weeks.