PDA

View Full Version : I Got 99 Problems and a Ship Ain't One



Kal Olorin
Apr 28th, 2015, 11:40:44 AM
TOMORROW



I woke up surrounded by naked asses. Literally. One of them was right by my face and it peeled back it's lips to gently nibble on the grass, revealing a giant set of herbivorous teeth. I groaned and rolled onto my back, staring up at the sky. It was ominously overcast.

The donkey brayed in my ear, and I sat up with a curse, putting my hand down in a pile of shit as I pushed myself upright. Adding insult to injury, it started to rain. Looking around all I could see were the animals around me. No lights. No civilization. My head hurt, and I couldn't even remember what planet I was on. Obviously whatever I'd been drinking the night before...well I should never drink it again. What had it been...? Temporary amnesia wasn't typically a good sign, but if I'd ended up in the ass end of nowhere (ha!) maybe I didn't want to know.

Except a Vigo of Black Sun didn't typically end up in these situations as a result of some hilarious prank. I wiped my hand on the grass and stumbled to my feet, leaning against the warm body of the donkey as my head spun, until it looked back and tried to remove my fingers from my hand. What an ass.



TODAY



"The Hutts are digging in their heels - figuratively speaking," I added. "Look, I don't like it either, but we're in danger of losing the whole casino if we don't give over in - no I don't presume to know everything - yeah. Sasseeri -"

I pulled the commlink away from my ear as she filled the transmission with high pitched and imaginative curses. When it faded I cautiously put the ear piece back in. "What was that? No, of course I told them no. It cuts our bottom line in half if they raise the price of the spice, what with the added costs of shipping through Alliance space now. Ok sure. Yeah I'll be sure to tell the Desilijics that as soon as possible."

I rolled my eyes as the conversation abruptly ended, and pulled out the ear piece, tossing it on the desk in front of me. And of course, at that moment there was a chime at the door.

Your noon appointment is here to see you.

Of fracking course it was. "Send them in, Tragoni." I scrubbed my hands through my hair and got up, looking for the whiskey.