My pocketknives are ideological mortal enemies

[Charley]

A few months ago, I bought myself a decent pocketknife, seeing as I didn't have one. I got a Smith & Wesson "Homeland Security" knife. With a moniker like that, it surely seemed destined to skewer dozens of jihadists and godless commies like so many kabobs:

<img src=http://www.panic.hopto.org/swf/charley/homelandsecurity.jpg>

Yesterday, I was browsing a local gun show, and I found an incredibly interesting pig-sticker. This one seemed destined to incite revolution and hate freedom, and bore the moniker of the Automat Kalashnikov 74, the latest weapon of choice of our mortal enemies of the 80's, the Soviets, and later the evil Taliban warlords:

<img src=http://www.panic.hopto.org/swf/charley/ak74.jpg>

This seemed to be setting the stage of a conflict the likes of which I have never seen before:

<img src=http://www.panic.hopto.org/swf/charley/knifewar.jpg>

Whoever wins, we lose, or at least I cut a finger :(

[imported_Grev Drasen]

I've had the same bland $20 Case for four years :(

That Kalashnikov is sexy (it gets my vote, because I'm a filthy freedom hater)

[Charley]

It's also a switchblade >D