Arwenai Evenstar
Jul 13th, 2004, 06:51:49 AM
Silverchair - Suicidal Dream
<font color=red>
I dream about how it's going to end,
Approaching me quickly.
Leaving a life of fear,
I only want my mind to be clear.
People making fun of me,
For no reason but jealousy.
I fantasise about my death,
I'll kill myself from holding my breath,
My suicidal dream,
Voices telling me what to do.
My suicidal dream,
I'm sure you will get your's too.
Help me, comfort me,
Stop me from feeling what I'm feeling now.
The rope is here, now I'll find a use.
I'll kill myself, I'll put my head in a noose.
My suicidal dream,
Voices telling me what to do.
My suicidal dream,
I'm sure you will get your's too.
Dreamin' about my death, dream...
Suicidal, suicidal, Suicidal dream
Suicidal, suicidal, Suicidal dream</font>
--
Why do some beings take their own lifes, when they have so much to live for? Why are cries for help never heard? How can one family be poor and yet be happy, when another has everything and is hell?
This is story on what the death of one being can lead to, how it affects the lives of others that never knew him, except after death. It's about the consequences our actions can have over others.
It is also about family and how important they are.
This is a follow-on to the Dark Fury fan fiction, removed several years from the final act. In between the time of Dark Fury and today, the characters have moved on, changing in some ways greatly. While this follows on from Dark Fury, then Sick Cycle Carosel, then Learning to Live, this is a new chapter and a new direction. It could also be called Children of the Jedi.
--
In a corner of Coruscant, not far from where her mother lived and worked at the Senate, Arwenai Evenstar slept. Only three months old, she was a Jedi child, for while her mother was a Senator, she was also a very well known and powerful Jedi Knight named Helenias Evenstar. Much rumour and speculation had occured in the halls of the Senate as to the father of the child - it had come to pass the father was named as Dwayne Hicks, a former NRSF soldier whom had died defending Evenstar in a dispicable assasination attempt as she was due to give birth. Footage of that attack had come to life, showing the pregnant Senator battling droids and Dark Jedi - the price on the Senator's head after that had doubled to an unheard of 4 million credits, but there were no longer any takers. Evenstar had a history of defeating assasination, with the assassins winding up dead. If a well executed attack while she was supposed to be at her most vunerable didn't work.... what would?
Still, she was cautious. The senator was loath to expose her tiny daughter to danger and hence, except for fleeting visits in secrecy, her daughter was looked after by the real father, a near-human alien from Arnor. Like Helenias, he was a powerful Force user.
A good deal more powerful. An ex-Jedi Master of all things, a being of real power, much older than his looks said he was. He had decided some time ago that his path was not of the Jedi and had become one of the few Jedi Masters to have ever willingly left the Order. His reasons had never been explained, but he had left quietly, having records of his existance erased or modified. As far as anyone was concerned, he was just some weary traveller. Except to Helenias, for the ex Master was her husband, even if they kept their union secret.
He lived generally upstairs of a Diner, which was where he also chose to look after Arwenai. The Diner was owned by a creature named Dexter, a rough lizard like being but with a good heart. Sharing the upstairs floor was River Kincaid and his children, Natia Telcontar whom was the Master's Padawan and whom he had custody of sorts. She called him Grandpa, which in someways was correct. Natia's adopted mother had also been a learner of the Master, becoming like a daughter before she disgraced herself and was killed.
The Master's name was Marceloi Telcontar. He preferred the shortened Marcus. He was over 160 years old, even if he only looked 40'ish. He had a long history, of which much had been written in the past. He never expected to be in charge of the care of a real daughter, especially not a baby.
Much to his surprise, he reflected as he leaned over the cot where his daughter slept, he was rather liking parenthood. Arwenai had a rough birth, but had quickly settled down, becoming a typical baby - eat, sleep, burp and cry. Marcus noted that Arwenai beginning to become aware of herself and her enviroment, able to respond to visual stimuli and recognise beings. She also was clearly able to identify voices and noises. She was sleeping pretty well now, which was relieving her father a lot - he thought the late night feeds were goign to drive him crazy. Helenias helped when she could, but with her roles as a Senator and a Jedi, there was not much left for full time mother.
Marcus didnt mind in the end. He never expected soemthing so wonderful and precious as this child to come into his life. He reached out and touched the soft cheek of Arwenai, smiing crookedly as she slept. What a little miricle.
"Hey... Hey Marcus?"
Arwenai stirred, sighed softly as she moved. The noise of her father moving to greet Natia didn't bother her, she was quite well used to such things. She was even used to the large black cat leaping lightly up onto the edges of her cot, then stepping down to curl up in the warmth of the foot of her blankets. The cat was named Stig, after a famed Pod-racer, black as night with yellow lantern eyes that seemed to glow of their own accord. Not that there was anything really special about the feline. He however was very careful not to disobey the command of his Master - foot of the cot was fine, no closer to the Sindarian Kitten would be tolerated.
And so the young child slept for another few hours. She began to stir close to evening, not too far in time from her regular feeding. The cat stirred as well, eyes partially closed as he stared at her. The cat sensed the approach of Marcus first, turning his head well before he had walked back into the room.
"Stig - out"
The cat yawned, got up, stretched, then leaped out of the cot as if he didnt have a care in the world. The girl stared blearily out of the bars of the cot, seeing only a large mass of cloth. She yawned, just before a set of hands gently folded back the blanket that kept her warm, then picked her up. She protested slightly, settling down only when she felt herself against the chest of her father.
"OKay... just me, Arwenai. You hungry?"
She yawned again, feeling safe and warm in her father's arm.
<font color=red>
I dream about how it's going to end,
Approaching me quickly.
Leaving a life of fear,
I only want my mind to be clear.
People making fun of me,
For no reason but jealousy.
I fantasise about my death,
I'll kill myself from holding my breath,
My suicidal dream,
Voices telling me what to do.
My suicidal dream,
I'm sure you will get your's too.
Help me, comfort me,
Stop me from feeling what I'm feeling now.
The rope is here, now I'll find a use.
I'll kill myself, I'll put my head in a noose.
My suicidal dream,
Voices telling me what to do.
My suicidal dream,
I'm sure you will get your's too.
Dreamin' about my death, dream...
Suicidal, suicidal, Suicidal dream
Suicidal, suicidal, Suicidal dream</font>
--
Why do some beings take their own lifes, when they have so much to live for? Why are cries for help never heard? How can one family be poor and yet be happy, when another has everything and is hell?
This is story on what the death of one being can lead to, how it affects the lives of others that never knew him, except after death. It's about the consequences our actions can have over others.
It is also about family and how important they are.
This is a follow-on to the Dark Fury fan fiction, removed several years from the final act. In between the time of Dark Fury and today, the characters have moved on, changing in some ways greatly. While this follows on from Dark Fury, then Sick Cycle Carosel, then Learning to Live, this is a new chapter and a new direction. It could also be called Children of the Jedi.
--
In a corner of Coruscant, not far from where her mother lived and worked at the Senate, Arwenai Evenstar slept. Only three months old, she was a Jedi child, for while her mother was a Senator, she was also a very well known and powerful Jedi Knight named Helenias Evenstar. Much rumour and speculation had occured in the halls of the Senate as to the father of the child - it had come to pass the father was named as Dwayne Hicks, a former NRSF soldier whom had died defending Evenstar in a dispicable assasination attempt as she was due to give birth. Footage of that attack had come to life, showing the pregnant Senator battling droids and Dark Jedi - the price on the Senator's head after that had doubled to an unheard of 4 million credits, but there were no longer any takers. Evenstar had a history of defeating assasination, with the assassins winding up dead. If a well executed attack while she was supposed to be at her most vunerable didn't work.... what would?
Still, she was cautious. The senator was loath to expose her tiny daughter to danger and hence, except for fleeting visits in secrecy, her daughter was looked after by the real father, a near-human alien from Arnor. Like Helenias, he was a powerful Force user.
A good deal more powerful. An ex-Jedi Master of all things, a being of real power, much older than his looks said he was. He had decided some time ago that his path was not of the Jedi and had become one of the few Jedi Masters to have ever willingly left the Order. His reasons had never been explained, but he had left quietly, having records of his existance erased or modified. As far as anyone was concerned, he was just some weary traveller. Except to Helenias, for the ex Master was her husband, even if they kept their union secret.
He lived generally upstairs of a Diner, which was where he also chose to look after Arwenai. The Diner was owned by a creature named Dexter, a rough lizard like being but with a good heart. Sharing the upstairs floor was River Kincaid and his children, Natia Telcontar whom was the Master's Padawan and whom he had custody of sorts. She called him Grandpa, which in someways was correct. Natia's adopted mother had also been a learner of the Master, becoming like a daughter before she disgraced herself and was killed.
The Master's name was Marceloi Telcontar. He preferred the shortened Marcus. He was over 160 years old, even if he only looked 40'ish. He had a long history, of which much had been written in the past. He never expected to be in charge of the care of a real daughter, especially not a baby.
Much to his surprise, he reflected as he leaned over the cot where his daughter slept, he was rather liking parenthood. Arwenai had a rough birth, but had quickly settled down, becoming a typical baby - eat, sleep, burp and cry. Marcus noted that Arwenai beginning to become aware of herself and her enviroment, able to respond to visual stimuli and recognise beings. She also was clearly able to identify voices and noises. She was sleeping pretty well now, which was relieving her father a lot - he thought the late night feeds were goign to drive him crazy. Helenias helped when she could, but with her roles as a Senator and a Jedi, there was not much left for full time mother.
Marcus didnt mind in the end. He never expected soemthing so wonderful and precious as this child to come into his life. He reached out and touched the soft cheek of Arwenai, smiing crookedly as she slept. What a little miricle.
"Hey... Hey Marcus?"
Arwenai stirred, sighed softly as she moved. The noise of her father moving to greet Natia didn't bother her, she was quite well used to such things. She was even used to the large black cat leaping lightly up onto the edges of her cot, then stepping down to curl up in the warmth of the foot of her blankets. The cat was named Stig, after a famed Pod-racer, black as night with yellow lantern eyes that seemed to glow of their own accord. Not that there was anything really special about the feline. He however was very careful not to disobey the command of his Master - foot of the cot was fine, no closer to the Sindarian Kitten would be tolerated.
And so the young child slept for another few hours. She began to stir close to evening, not too far in time from her regular feeding. The cat stirred as well, eyes partially closed as he stared at her. The cat sensed the approach of Marcus first, turning his head well before he had walked back into the room.
"Stig - out"
The cat yawned, got up, stretched, then leaped out of the cot as if he didnt have a care in the world. The girl stared blearily out of the bars of the cot, seeing only a large mass of cloth. She yawned, just before a set of hands gently folded back the blanket that kept her warm, then picked her up. She protested slightly, settling down only when she felt herself against the chest of her father.
"OKay... just me, Arwenai. You hungry?"
She yawned again, feeling safe and warm in her father's arm.