Finding my Spirituality within the Force....(Figrin)

[imported_Jacali Danner]

Jacali Danner breathed in deeply after settling carefully onto a meditation mat. She felt a need to be here, to relax and soak herself into the flow of the Force.

The Force was her need, her desire and her guide. The Light Side was where her spirit flowed fully, completely. Jacali wanted nothing more than to become a Jedi Knight and one day a master. But, everything had it's beginning and Jacali had taken such strides to get where she was.

The Padawan had had setbacks, but nothing that had stopped her, she had proven that much and she was ready to take on more.

But, how could she challenge herself anymore spiritually? She had already over come a huge obstacle, the accident that had left her with a brace for the rest of her life. That had been hard, but the Padawan had recovered and now she wanted to help others, could that be where her spirituality fit in?

So many questions and so few answers, she needed to know just where her life would fit into the Order and if her spiritual link with the Force could reside with her beliefs of her life and of the Code.

With a deep thought, Jacali used her telepathy to Jedi Master whom she never really talked to. She needed answers from a new source, one that didn't really know her. With careful thought she called to him.

Jedi Master D'an, this is Padawan learner Jacali Danner, may I please have a word with you? I'm in training room four-twenty-seven.

Now, she waited.

[Figrin D'an]

Conflict... battle... the Dark Side...

Dust kicked up around them both, obscuring their surroundings as sabre blades, one of dark blue, one of burning red sliced through the air and clashed loudly, locking against one another. Figrin spun out of the block and took the offensive, pushing his opponent back with a series of quick sabre strikes, but the man seemed to defend flawlessly. The red of dark one's blade became a blur, and Figrin was once again fighting to parry and block. Downward strike of rage met the Jedi Master's upward angled block, and the sabre's again locked. The brute strength of the two forced the blades together, drawing the opponents toward one another.

One swift backhand, aided by a durasteel wrist guard, cracked against Figrin's face, sending his balance into chaos. A quick Force-push, and the Jedi Master was thrown backward, crashing back first into a stone wall. He crumpled, collapsing against it, no longer able to stand.

"You were fool then, Figrin... and you are still a fool," came the dark one's voice, his hulking figure standing over the defeated Jedi. "You're the last one... what irony that you survived it this long, only to be killed by me."

The dark one raised his hand, and with a laugh of perverse pleasure, let loose a torrent of powerful lightning...





Figrin had been meditating himself a few rooms away when he felt a telepathic summons touch the edge of his mind. It jolted him back to reality, tearing him away from the haunting vision in which he had been immersed. Perhaps it was a good thing... it was one of the most disturbing he had ever experienced. Never before had seen any image of involving his own death. Despite what he knew was on the horizon, his own mortality had never troubled him like this. Even James Prent's recent vision that she had shared with him didn't have a profound effect. But this... this had found its way into his own psyche.

And it concerned him... it scared him. Admitted that was perhaps as difficult as watching the vision itself unfold.


But, he had to respond to the summons, and getting his mind off of the images he had witnessed seemed prudent. Getting to his feet, Figirn grabbed his cloak, tossed it on, exited the room and headed down the hallway. He came to room four-twenty-seven a few minutes later.

The door slid open, and Figrin stepped in, finding a young woman in a state of light meditation. He recognized her as Jacali Danner, though only from her database entry. They had never spoken before. He waited silently for her to acknowledge his presence.

[imported_Jacali Danner]

A life change had occurred and Jacali seemed to be in the middle of it. So many times she studied in hte Archives to figure out the answers that she seeked. A few times, she had even thought of becoming an Archivist, a diplomat, or a teacher.

Which one suited her? The spirituality that she felt led her in all directions and it was a becoming a bit of concern as she neared her Knighthood.

Within her meditation, she heard the door, she felt the presence and opened her eyes. Master D'an.

Standing, she bowed. "I hope, I've not disturbed you too badly, Master. I'm in need of some guidance."

[Figrin D'an]

"Not, not at all, Jacali," he replied. "I was just finished with some meditation of my own."

Figrin moved into the room, stopping a few feet from the young woman and resting his hands comfortably behind his back.

"What is it that you wanted to discuss?"

[imported_Jacali Danner]

"How and when does a Jedi know which path of righteousness is suited for them? I've got several ideas, but still none of them are directly calling out to me. I would have figured that by now, I would know my calling."

[Figrin D'an]

"Well, a lot of it depends upon natural talents, or certain skills that seem to be more comfortable to a given student," the Jedi Master answered. "But, those aren't necessarily the only factors to consider, either. Personal experiences can play a big role as well."

"Why don't you tell me some of the ideas you have had, and we can consider how they might fit you personally?," he suggested.

[imported_Jacali Danner]

"I spend a lot of time, hours actually researching information in the Archives, I do like it there. So, an Archivist has gone through my mind, but still if I go through with that, I don't feel as if I'm doing my part as a Jedi. I'm young and I feel that perhaps I should be out beyond these walls, doing my part."

She paused for a moment. "Continuing teaching the younglings, the test run is going well and I can see myself there as well and my last choice was being a diplomat, like my Master. But, still nothing is actually calling to me, saying 'ya this is right, this is where I need to be.'"

[Figrin D'an]

"You know, there are many Jedi whom don't think about a specialization until they become Knights," Figrin stated. "They try a broad spectrum of things, then make a decision after their apprenticeships end."

He wandered about the room a bit, observing nothing in particular, while attempting to learn more about the padawan.

"You said you feel at times that you should be beyond the walls of the Order," he said, roughly echoing her phrasing. "Is there something in particular that you feel you need to experience?"

[imported_Jacali Danner]

"I'm not entirely sure, Master D'an. I just feel like I'm missing something important, like it's there but I can't see it. Being a seer and not being able to see my own path doesn't seem quite fair. But, I've read up on many Jedi with Seer abilities and that is quite normal. I've learned the Jedi way because I want to, it is my path, both physical and spiritual. It is the only way for me and I want to be a good and well disaplined Jedi Knight."

She paused. "But, if I could only figure out my path and dedicate myself to it fully. I often feel like I'm being pulled in too many directions at once, but I can't chose which area is right for me and I end up continuing to take on everything as I have been doing."

[Figrin D'an]

"Many padawans finding focusing on one or two areas in their Jedi training to be difficult," he agreed. "There's always the desire to learn more and to impress their masters with diversity."

Figrin rubbed his beard for a moment, then finally stopped pacing as a thought occured to him.

"Have you considered a change of surrounding?"

Jacali looked puzzled, so the Jedi Master elaborated.

"The new academy on Yavin IV will soon be open for Jedi wishing to live and train in a different environment. It may offer some possibilities that are not available for you here."

[imported_Jacali Danner]

"Hmmm, that sounds very interesting, Master D'an. Maybe a change is what I need..."

Her mind went to the kids she was teaching and how they would react if she suddenly up and left. That wouldn't be fair to them, if she did that.

Jacali loved teaching them...then it hit her at that very moment. Teaching, it was above everything else, she was doing. "Master D'an...that's it. My teaching of the Younglings, that is what I want to do. I love doing that and leaving them behind isn't even an option. I can't just walk out on them."