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Loklorien s'Ilancy
Mar 23rd, 2004, 02:38:09 AM
If you decide to haunt me, there’s going to have to be a few ground-rules set down. I’m not about to let you freeload, and if you think you’re going to have free room and board you’re sadly mistaken I’ve taken the time to write out the simple rules for keeping me company in the paranormal sense, and I expect them to be followed. So read them carefully. I’ll be adding more as time goes by.

Basic House Rules and Conduct

- First and foremost, you’re going to help me get a job. If you want a place to stay, then help me out in affording it.

- None of that breaking dishes garbage. I expect you to help keep the kitchen clean and throw out food if it’s spoiled.

- No turning the lights on and off. Light is money, and if I’m not in the room, don’t even think of turning the lights on unless you want to pay the electricity bill. I’m not a money tree.

- No hiding things. It’s hard enough remembering where I put stuff without your little childish jokes. If I set something down, I expect it to stay there. Failure to adhere to this will result in a temporary banishment to the crazy lady’s apartment across the hall. Trust me. You don’t want that.

- Excessive noise, ie: stomping around, hitting walls, etc etc, will absolutely not be tolerated. I live right above the super, so unless you’d like to go out apartment hunting for me, by all means keep it up.

- DO NOT write on the walls. If you want to write and draw that bad, I’ll buy you a notepad and a pack of bic pens. Conversely, if I find one scribble or sentence in any of my sketchbooks, you’re out. No questions asked.

- If I find anything in my fridge such as Smirnoff Ice or Guiness, we WILL be having words.

- If I find any chocolate, any donuts, or any cheese in my apartment, we WILL be having words.

- My clothes stay in my dresser. Don’t throw them around unless you want to pick them up.


Behavioral conduct

- Don’t stand over me and watch me while I sleep. It’s rude and voyeuristic, and people don’t appreciate it, least of all me. If you need something to do, go play playstation 2 or watch a movie. Hop online and surf the net – I don’t care.

- If you feel the need to scratch and bruise something, I’ll buy a scratching post and a punching bag so you can take out your aggressions on them. Hell, I might join you. Lord knows I’ve got angst that needs to be released.

- No coldspots. The temperature in my apartment fluctuates enough as it is without your help.

- If you need to talk to me, speak clearly and coherently. No whispering or mumbling in other tongues. I have little patience for crap like that, so if you have something to say, say it. Now - that doesn’t mean yell or shout or scream. Talk like a civilized person.

- DON’T FLUSH MY SMOKES DOWN THE TOILET.

Tear
Mar 23rd, 2004, 02:45:09 AM
Well then whats the point? taken all the fun outta it

Silus Xilarian
Mar 23rd, 2004, 02:48:52 AM
haha, no rules against my plans >=]

Loklorien s'Ilancy
Mar 23rd, 2004, 02:51:27 AM
tear, rules are rules. if you dont want to deal with mine, then dont apply for the - HEY! STOP THAT!!

Silus Xilarian
Mar 23rd, 2004, 02:52:31 AM
Not breaking the rules :)

Tear
Mar 23rd, 2004, 02:55:54 AM
Hey you never said anything about not being allowed to use your uh under garments for sling shots to hit the neighbors. Its fair game

Loklorien s'Ilancy
Mar 23rd, 2004, 03:10:51 AM
a few very important points was raised, so im adding some more rules under the behavioral conduct section.

- As far as possession goes, not once are you to take control of my body in any sense. I've got enough problems without you messing with my head. However, if you find the need to possess something overwhelming you, go take over the neighbors cat for a day.

- I don't have cable. If you want cable, you can go out, find a job, and purchase it yourself. I already pay for the dsl as it is.

Marcus Telcontar
Mar 23rd, 2004, 04:24:56 AM
- DON’T FLUSH MY SMOKES DOWN THE TOILET.

The dunny is too young to smoke

Darth Viscera
Mar 23rd, 2004, 06:38:34 AM
too human to smoke, more like

this is what you get for reading all those stories about hauntings, sis.