Jake Snake Advanced Tactical Concepts Training

[Khendon Sevon]

You are orbiting the planet Omerose, the leading producer of Federacy technology, onboard the Insuperable-class star destroyer Harbinger of Doom. The day has been a continual bore of inspecting incoming vessels and drilling those under your command.

The traffic suddenly picks up, your sensors’ officer quickly reports a massive influx of craft about to break from hyperspace only a few thousand kilometers from the planet you’ve been tasked with keeping secure.

Your flotilla consists of the following vessels:
Insuperable-class SD Harbinger of Doom
Nihilist-class SD Last Stand
Dirk-class Avenging Arrow
Praetor-class Sullen Night
“ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ Black Sun
“ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ Lost Star
“ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ Final Judge
and 12 ST-1000’s

The incoming vessels (you do not know this yet) are all from Sovereignty space, they consist of older Imperial models (ISD3’s, etc) Consider them a full SD squadron (we’ll say that means 4 ISD-class with support vessels)

You will be graded upon your ability to think on your feet, creativity, clarity, usage of tactics, thought process, command of the English language, and most importantly your ability to understand and incorporate Federacy technology in your posts.

You may post at your own rate. Occasionally I will make comments or critiques, I suggest you heed them.

Overall, try to have fun :)

[Jake Snake]

Commodore Jake Snake sat in his command seat aboard the flagship of his defense group, the Insuperable Class Star Destroyer Harbringer of Doom. He closed his eyes and looked over the sensor data inside his mind. Everything was boring these days. He was here babysitting a planet that probably was never going to get attacked. However, he was an officer in the Federacy and was going to do his job to his best ability.
Jake looked over the data and at the training excersises going on in the space around them. Squads of fighters were flying against each other and others were doing straffing runs on floating targets. He was training his men and women to be prepared for anything. Drills were run everyday on different things and sometimes more than once per day. Jake knew, however, that these drills could one day save the lives of his people. Hopefully they would never have to experiance the horror of war, but that was not upto him. If they were called upon, they would do whatever it takes to protect the Federacy and their objective.
Opening his eyes Jake started to look around. He stood up and went over tp the massive bridge viewport. Looking out he saw the planet and the docking station in the distance. Ships were moving to and from the planet on planned routes. These routes took them between some of the defense ships in the fleet. He had his ships arrange a corridor of other ships to have to come through. To the starboard was the Dirk Class, Avenging Arrow and 2 of the Praetor Class cruisers. To his Port was the Nihilist Class and 2 of the other Praetor Class cruisers. Around them were 12 Executioner MkIVs, 12 Executioner MkIIIs, and 8 Shriekers doing live fire training missions. On patrol around the system were 4 ST-1000s and another 4 were around the planet, looking after security. The other 4 STs were docked at the station on a break.
Jake smiled at the beauty of the sun and planet. He would have to take a break and travel down some time. As he watched, an alert broke out. Alarms blared and the holo display at the center of the bridge changed suddenly. Its display suddenly zoomed out of the planet space and out of the system. Just outside it, a red dot formed, moving quicked into the system. "Unauthorized system entry detected!!" The computer shouted.
The XO turned, "Sir, we have a mass of ships coming into the system via hyperspace. Indication is that they will come out here. ETA...15 minutes. Its large sir."
Jake nodded and closed his eyes, moving through the day's ship lists and nothing of that size was shedualed for today. The sensors along the system didn't pick up any IFF codes, meaning it wasn't friendly. Jake though about the fleet going to red alert instantly alarms rang out and people started to rush to battlestations. This thoughts were read by the right people and the computer system. This was happening all over the system now. His fleet was in high alert and shields and weapons came on line at once.
Fighters started to launch and form up at once. His ships all started to turn, pointing their forwards into the direction of the threat. The ST-1000s at the docking stations started to fire up and get crews ready. As per orders, the other ST-1000 on patrol stayed where they are, while the ones around the planet started to form up and come together. They would look like one big target to anyone that came into the system. The fighters and Shriekers that launched all went behind the mass of capital ships and took up hidding possitions close to the cruises, to prevent them from being seen.
Withing 15 minutes all ships were more than ready and than, all at once, space opened up and out came a force of ships. They were instantly scanned and shown to be Sovereignty ships. In all were 4 ISD mkIIIs, 2 enforcer class SDs, 4 Lancer Frigates, 3 Strike Cruisers, and 2 Carrack Class Cruisers. Jake took a seat in his command seat and closed his eyes, The battle was on.

[Jake Snake]

As soon at the enemy ships came out of hyperspace, the ships started to launch fighters. Right than the order to open fire was given. The long range cannons on the Federacy ships opened up in the direction of the ISD hanger bays. This fire caused some confusion and killed 10 fighters in the first moments of launches. It kept on taking out some fighters and bombers, while doing a little damage to shields. Soon, however, about 350 fighters and bombers had formed up and raced in against the Federacy ships, which looked defenseless.

Under orders the Federacy fleet had formed a Cresent shape and the fighter/bomber group of the enemy flew into it. They were after the largest ship, the Insuperable. As they approached, the gunners waited, untill the orders came in. As soon as the order to fire was given, all hell broke loose. The Defense batteries on the Federacy ships took the fighters and bombers by surprises. Their intentence rate of fire shreded the enemy formations, picking off the slowers bombers at will. Anti-matter cannons further decimated the formation of Bombers and fighters,which was now splitting. Along with the cannons, heavy torpedos also started to explose around the enemy craft, killing whole squadrons and groups that were bunched together. It was a massacure. To top it off, the Federacy Executionar squadrons along with Reaper squads flew in from the Port and Starboard, ripping further into the unsuspecting Sov fighters and what was left of the bombers. The Federacy galting cannons tore the formations into scrap metal, while loosing only 4 of their own fighters. Surprise was always the best weapon.

Out of all those fighters and bombers, only 210 were left and that number was dropping as the battle started to rage on. However, now the large ships had joined in and the Sov had the number advantage there. The IMP MKIIIs started to pound the Insuperable and Nihilist Class. The Federacy were firing back with better weapons and holding their own. Suddenly orders came in from Snake and the Nihilism Class, as well as 2 Praetor Class cruisers started to turn from the battle and jumped into hyperspace. With this, the enemy ships closed in and started to pound the Insuperable, Dirk, and 2 remaining Praetors. The heavy Federacy shields were holding, but the Lancers were taking a toll on the fighters. The Faster Praetors moved over carfully and started to rain fire and destruction onto the 4 Lancers. The Micro-Mass cannons on the cruisers made fast work of taking out the Lancers shield generators, as the Inferno and Enmity cannons melted through the Lancers hulls. A salvo of Quantum Torpedos finished off the job quickly, as the ships were engulfed in huge fireballs. With their mission complete, the 2 Praetors turned on the 2 Carrak Cruisers and started to fire at them. They had taken some shield damage themselves, but their semi-stealth coating made it hard for accurate lock ons.

The Praetors analyzed the Carracks and new that they had weaknesses with their armor around their reactor core. Both Federacy ships accelerated quickly and flew by the slower Carrack Class Cruiers. As the flew by, their Micro-Mass Cannons sliced through the Carracks shields and into their power cores. The shots destroyed the Power systems and overloaded them, causing one of the ships to explode and the other to drift without power. After the assault, the Praetors split up and went to engage the Strike Class cruisers. One took on two and the other took on one. Seeing these ships as a threat, the 2 Enforcers started to turn and engage the lonely Praetors.

Meanwhile, the larger ships began to fight. As the 4 ISDs came in, the Insuperable and Dirk Cruiser formed up and charged up their Densa cannons. All at once, they both fired into one of the ISDs. The shots hit at the same time and the massive power surge blew out the ISD's shields. As the shields went down, the Dirk and Insuperable engaged the Large destroyer with everything they had. The Enmity cannons, inferno batteries, and CEPP cannons sliced through the SDs armor like butter, opening huge holes in the once great warship. The cannons almost completely cut the bridge structure off of the ship. They destroyed shield generators and targeting stations. In moments the ship was a burning hulk, with only a few weapons firing wildly into space.

Recieving orders, the shriekers formed up and the 28 gunships flew out in groups, just as the ISDs launched their Missiles at the Insuperable. These were soon picked off by the ships any missile systems, as were many of the SDs turbolaser blasts. The Shriekers however, formed up and flew in on the center ISD. Around them, Executioner fighters formed up and cleared away. Behind the Shriekers, came a squad of fully loaded Reaper Assault fighters. When the Shriekers were close enough they all fired their Densa cannons into one part of the ISDs shields. In seconds the shields overloaded and droped. AS they did the Shriekers peeled away and behind them came in the Reaper fighters. The 12 Reapers came in fast and flew over the ISD's hull. As they did, they dropped 12 Heavy Bombs and fired 24 Heavy torped into the unshielded bridge. As the Bombs exploded, their massive force almost cracked the ISD in half. A few hit over the Hanger bays and caused the fuel tanks inside to explode. These massive explosions broke the fore section of the ISD clear off. Than the Heavy torps exploded and annihilated the bridge of the ISD, killing most of the trained crew. The Reapers turned away and accelerated away from the battle.

As the did, the Dirk and Insuperable came appart and from behind them in a tight formation of 8 ST-1000. The 4 STs at the dry docks had formed up with the 4 already on station and flew in to help. They Flew through the middle of the ISD formation and finished off the hit ISD that was floating there. They flew between the two remaining ISDs and went off to help the Praetors.

Just then, space opened up and out came a tight formation with the Nihilism Class leading 2 Praetors. They closed in on the Strike Cruisers and Enforcer Cruisers and were eager to get in on the action.

[Khendon Sevon]

Sugguestions/Critiques so far:

Great action, perfect usage of the weapons.

I'd like to see more description in the damage, debries, fighting, etc.

Write what your character does and sees, not just the fleet's actions, make it personal.

I'd sugguest leaving numbers out, they can cause opponents to spaz out. It's usually best to leave it up to them to decide the damage and for you to call it on them if you disagree.

[Jake Snake]

As the Nihilism Class and the other Praetors came into the picture, the Strikers, after taking a heavy beating from the other Praetors started to move away. Soon two exploded after heavy damage and another was drifting in space, full of holes and fires buring around it. Debris filled the darkness and impacted shields as it flew through space. The quite night was now full of death. Jake was thankful that his forces haven't suffered as much. This fighters were taking a toll but it wasn't heavy. He had instructed them to stay close to the other capital ship so that they would have defense battery support. The Batteries had decimated the Sov fighter groups with precise fire.

Jake looked out of the window and frowned. He didn't want all this death, but it wasn't his choice, the Sov had chosen to attack them and they would pay dearly. The Commodore looked at the SD in from of him. "Helm, accelerate to full at taget Alpha Two. Get ready to go under it on my command. Ready the Mass Cannons and the boarding troops."

In seconds the ship lurched forward and headed at the Massive ISD. As it neared the Destroyer started to fire at it, a lot of the blasts were picked off, but a lot still got in to hit the Insuperables shields. The heavy shields held and at 1000 meters the order was given and the massive Federacy ship dived and moved under the ISD. As it did, it targeted the Ionization reactor on the SDs belly. More orders were issued quickly through the neural links and half of the ships Mass cannons fired out. They sliced through the ventral shielding and slamed into the armor covering the massive reactor. The explosion opened a large hole in the armor and the other half of the mass cannons fired right after. The shots were dead on and went into the hole made by the first volley. Everything was silent for a second and than a brilliant explosion blossomed from the bottom of the Destroyer. It melted the whole armored dome and a lot of the surrounded area. The fired shots had not only taken out the main reactor, but had also managed to damage the axilliary reactor on the port side. That reactor went criticle and vaporized almost the entire rear of the SD.

This was unexpected to Jake and he grinned his teeth as the Insuperable SD shook violently. Shields had went down to 70 % in an instant. THe ship started to move away and left the dieing ISD in it's wake. "Launch boarding teams. I want to bridge crew and the captain."

In moments the boarding shuttles launched and went towards the ISD. In the distance Jake noticed an ST-1000 floating dead in space. It had been hit with a barrage of Heavy turbolaser fire. The other group of his task force had already finished off the Enforcers and the Strike cruiers and were now heading back to deal with the remaining SDs. This one was already hurt, however, from battleing with Dirk cruiser. His fighters and also finishing up killing the enemy fighters.

Half an hour later, Jake got the message that the boarding team had completed their mission and that the dieing SD was theirs. They had captured the captain and more of the bridge crew. They were having some resistance from the SDs stormtroopers. Jake told them to take the captured ones and leave. Under his orders, the hanger of the ISD was fired upon and destroyed. Leaving all crew of the ISD on board, to die if they didn't surrender. It was all over almost as soon as it started. The Sov attack force never had a chance.

[Khendon Sevon]

Alright, go back over that post, look for some usage errors and tense changes.

I want you to think about the contents of your post before you even start a line, that way you know what direction you want to write in.

I'd also sugguest writing small posts. This will allow you to proof read them quicker and increase the quality of the overal piece.

However, good job, I'm giving you the rank of Captain.

[Jake Snake]

well I just wanted to end this thing. I know you know that I can rp. I told you before that I post in smaller posts, but since this is training and I'm rping against me, I didn't think I needed to post in so many posts. I switched the time because I wanted to just get it over with and I didn't have a lot of time to post it. I want to finish training and all that and just get on with the story. It's just kinda boring to rp against me. If I were doing it against someone else, it would be different. Anyways, if I used something in correctly, please tell what it was and how I should correct so I can rp it out better next time. Thanx for the help.

[Khendon Sevon]

np, don't worry about the errors, then.

I have a mission for you, once you're ready.

IM me about it.