Frozen Memories (complete)

[hGozomi]

It was really a small, out of the way place; nothing about in any way stood out particularly. It was quiet, unassuming, and the perfect place to rest after the sun went down. If was a place to lose yourself in - nestled in a quaint section of one of the upper ends and frequented by the upperclass and those with proper etiquette.

A trait that made it easily attractive to a Guardian.

Even a Pariah. An Outcast.

The woman was an albino, her features fair and her eyes an eerie white that had been an oddity; even among her own race. But that was long ago - a time of her life which she preferred to not think of anymore. A painful time. And yet, there had been times that she was happy. With him.

Of course, looking back on it now she wondered how she could have ever been happy with someone who never touched her; not even holding her hand. Since leaving her people - since being cast out - she had gained an understanding of life that she had never been able to comprehend. And it was wonderful.

But she was cast out, away from her own people for standing against what she herself saw as an atrocity. A systematic slaughter; one by one, until every last Lupine was dead. It was unforgivable, and her revelation and subsequent banishment had not only cost her her home, but it had crippled her ability to use the force. They'd stripped her, peeled away her force abilities one layer at a time, leaving her with only the faintest of contact with the force. And yet, even that wasn't as painful as the the sight of the one who'd done it.

And she'd found out that he'd frequented this establishment for the last few days, coming in like clockwork. Ordering the same food and drink, and sitting in the same spot.

And so she waited for him. She knew she looked different than the last time he saw her; now, her hair was cropped short - and her clothes reflected a more wild taste that had developed within her. Gone were the normal dark coats and gloves. Instead, she wore white; pants and a shirt that complimented her figure nicely, giving her a tasteful appearence yet still catering to the lifestyle she so cherished now.

hGozomi, formerly Ms. Ice, sat waiting for Mr. Dust.

[Mr Dust]

At the end of a day, it was so refreshing to be able to enjoy a proper meal. No loud, raucus galavanting... no yelling... no improprieties. All was as it should be... simple and proper. He orders his usual and moves toward his customary seat. With a small start, he realizes that someone is sitting there. Very strange... no one ever seems to sit there but him.

No matter. He will simply go up to the young woman and ask if she would mind his company. Those who frequent this establishment are usually most polite. He moves near her and bows slightly, tipping his hat, before asking his question.

Excuse me, miss... I was wondering if I might join you at this tab...

He stops cold when the strikingly pale woman with ghost-white eyes turns toward him. Ms. Ice. Or, more correctly, simply Ice. But he cannot bring himself to call her that. Such an insult to refer to another without her title... though fitting for the traitor to the Guardians. She did not know it, but he had pleaded with the ruling council for leniency. All they would grant was that he could perform the Force nullification himself. When the terrible yet necessary ritual was performed, he tried to be as gentle as he possibly could. Instead of slamming her with the ritual and taking her powers all at once, he tried to remove them slowly so as to lessen the trauma. Some had died in the ritual. He could not bear to do so with her.

The shock at seeing her takes his breath. All he can stammer out is, ... you? How?

[hGozomi]

"You look exactly the same - even after all these years," was all she said, her voice as smooth as silk.

She didn't move to stand, instead using her foot to slide back the chair opposite hers while inclining her head at him to sit. In some ways it was wonderful to once more see his face; but on the same token, his had been the last face she'd seen before both the pain and the pressure on her body grew too strong.



...

Bound both with cords and through the force, the woman lay on the alter, her head turned to the side before casting pleading eyes up to the one she'd come to love and trust.

The one who was going to, in essence, be her executioner.

"Please," was all she could whisper, "... don't do this... "

[Mr Dust]

All he can do is stare in complete shock. Seeing her here, after what happened, and having her act as if nothing were wrong... it is most distressing. Finally, he comes to himself and resumes his normal politeness, albeit a bit forced.

Ah... why... thank you madam. You, however, seem different. How have you been in the interim?

This is indeed awkward. But perhaps, just perhaps, she has seen the error of her ways. If so, he may be able to represent her before the council, revoke the terrible price she had to pay...


...

He hears her whisper and can barely contain his pain and anguish. He does not wish to do this. But if he does not, another will. And it is doubtful that that person will do so with as much gentleness. He leans over her, as if to tighten a cord, and whispers in her ear...

I'm sorry... there is no other choice...

He tried to talk her out of her rash course of action. He could almost understand her feelings about the Lupines, but she never did truly understand the purpose of the Guardians. Their intent was never to destroy the Lupines. On the contrary, if the Lupines could be persuaded to simply live and let live, the Guardians would be content to do the same. But they would not. The Lupines were a scourge to the Outer Rim. Their entire lives revolved around destruction and death. No Guardian ever hunted Lupines... the Lupines always started the confrontations. But Ice never did seem to realize this. Had she not acted as she had, this ceremony would not be necessary. But removing the charged power supplies of four Guardians' sabers before they went on patrol was unforgivable. Four good men had died... and she was to blame. Though it tore his heart out to do so, he had to complete the ceremony. A single tear falls from his eye to her cheek. Such a display of emotion is almost unheard of... but he could not hold it in. He whispers "I'm sorry" to her once more before standing and continuing the ceremony...

[hGozomi]

An eyebrow cocked as she stared at him. It was easy to see he felt a bit awkward at seeing her once more, and just the look on his face was enough to tell her that her presence was surprising. And at that, the corners of her lips turned upwards in a ghost of a smile.

"You reek of forced congeniality, Mr. Dust," she said presently, "Am I that much of an abomination to you, of all people?"

... but the fact that he didn't call her by her name still hurt. A small portion of her had wanted him to.


...

His tear on her cheek would be his last parting gift, and she closed her eyes as her own emotions ran - far more unchecked as his. She even strained against the cords in a vain attempt at trying to free herself, but with the added aide of the force holding her down, there was nothing she could do.

It seemed no one had understood her - from her very first memories she could remember, it seemed she'd always been treated different. Of course, she herself was never as disciplined as the other Guardians; oh, she'd tried to be, she really did... and for a time it seemed she had a hold of her more untamed side that refused to be locked down. And then she came into contact with a Lupine for the first time, and that wild side had broken free. It was as if she could understand the metamorph - and it was in that moment that she realized she could no longer be a Guardian. In all the encounters she'd had with the Lupines, not one had hurt her nor tried to attack her.

But now, bound to an alter, Ice began to doubt. Everything. The Lupines, her people, everything and everyone. Except for Mr. Dust. In his own way he'd shown her compassion and care, and she'd grown attached to the man.

As Mr. Dust straightened himself from his position over her, she, couldn't help but mouth the three words that she'd always wanted to say to him, but never was able...

"... I love you... "

[Mr Dust]

Once again taken aback by her frankness, he takes a moment to compose himself.

You are not an abomination. You never were. If you only knew... I tried. I truly did. But regardless of your feelings, your actions caused the deaths of four good men. They did not provoke the fight! And they died, because they were suddenly unarmed. There was nothing I could do. It was only by the council's mercy that you were allowed to live. I know... the stripping of your title was... horrendous. I cannot bring myself to name you without it, nor can I name you with it. But there was no alternative. Surely you realize this?

...

[b]He watches her strain, and sees the pain in her eyes. It is all he can do to resist grabbing her and running away. With his phasing ability, he could grab her and sink through the floor, and then... no. That cannot happen. Justice must be served, no matter how painful.

She had always been a bit odd... an outsider. Her empathy with the Lupines was not unheard of. Other Guardians had had similar feelings and overcome them. But never in their history had a Guardian so betrayed her own brethren. And the betrayal had been even more painful to Dust himself. In all their time together, in all their talks, she never once mentioned doing such a thing. She told him of her misgivings about fighting the Lupines, but they had worked through that... or so he had thought. When her prints were found on the replaced power packs... he could barely stand.

But still... he forgave her. There had to be a way to fix things. He would find it... if she would let him, that is. The pain in her eyes lets him know that she sees him as the enemy now. If only he could explain... tell her that this is all he could do to try to save her.

He reads the words on her lips... the words he longed to hear and longed to return even more. All he can do is nod slightly. He tries to convey that he loves her as well through his look. He can only hope she understands. With near-unbearable sorrow, he places his hands on her head and begins to take her title, and with it her powers, one by one.

[hGozomi]

Her eyes took on a strange light, as she listened to his last words.

"I don't go by Ice in name anymore - I took on hGozomi soon after the ritual... and as for the stripping of my title, I don't rightly miss it in all honesty. It's just another reminder of what I had and lost. Yes, I admit there was a better way of going about the crime that I committed, but at the time it was the only thing I could think to do."

Her head bowed, a shock white strand of hair falling into her face. "If it meant that the Lupines lived, then good; but I'm still sorry it cost the lives of four Guardians - don't think I wasn't saddened - I knew them as well, you know."



...

She could feel his hands upon her, and despite the nature of why they were placed on her she could still feel the gentleness they possessed...

... and then she felt it; it was slight at first, like a building pressure. Only instead of pushing against her, it was pulling. She could feel her attunement to the force diminish slightly, as if it was being peeled away one layer at a time, and regardless of the intended gentleness, Ice still cried out. The pain grew as well - as each layer was pulled from the fiber of her very being.

Beads of sweat formed on her exposed skin, and she ground her teeth in the hopes of wading through the ordeal without losing consciousness.

[Mr Dust]

Seeing her again is almost more than he can bear. He was sure that after that day, he would never see her again. He drops all shreds of propriety... the questions raging inside of him have to be asked.

But... Ice... why? Why did you have to betray us? Why could you never understand? I tried so hard to help you understand... tried to make it right. But you never seemed to listen. I... I never wanted it to happen.

He pauses to take a breath and regain some semblance of composure before continuing.

I know you knew them. Which makes your actions all the more confusing. You know we never attacked Lupines without them provoking us. Not once did we attack their homeworld; we never even landed on it. We are called Guardians for a reason. We never attack, only defend. If you could only repent... perhaps they would be lenient...


...

The agony Ice was feeling at his hands was mirrored in Dust's heart. He would have given anything to trade places with her, to spare her this ordeal. But there was no other choice. Once he hears her cry out, he does his best to be even more gentle. He tries to pull her pain out with the Force, to take the burden on himself. He can't help but feel partly to blame. He should have seen it... if only he could have stopped her...

He finishes the ceremony as soon as possible. If he can only make it out of the chamber without weeping, it will be a miracle...

[hGozomi]

hGozomi paused. That he had called her by her name generated a sense of warmth in her chest - a warmth that hadn't been felt in a very long while. Her eyes softened... but only for a few moments before once more taking on their neutral, unassuming stare as she leaned forward a little,resting her elbows on the tabletop.

"Those that take it upon themselves to be watchers and protectors usually end up becoming one-minded about their duties and taking on more responsibilty than they're supposed to have. Ergo, is the birth of tyrants."

Her voice was utterly calm as she spoke, knowing the words she spoke were just as treasonous as her actions had been all those years ago.

hGozomi levelled a calm, white-eyed gaze at Mr. Dust.



...

She had lost consciousness halfway through the ritual, the pain and pressure much to great for her body to handle - even though Mr. Dust had tried to pull some of the hurt into himself. It was too much for her body; the feeling of being stripped bare and left with nothing.

[Mr Dust]

He sees her facade of strength and neutrality slip for just a moment. Perhaps she is not quite as far gone as he thought she was. There is still hope, then. The mere thought floods Dust with emotions he thought were lost to him. Her next comment brings him back to reality.

One-minded? Perhaps. But you know our laws were absolute. One of the cardinal sins was to initiate a fight. A Guardian would die before starting a confrontation! If the Lupines wished to be left alone, all they needed to do was not attack us or others. Their blood was on their own heads... but you know all this. Why, then?



...

As soon as the ritual ends, Dust looks down to Ice to see how she has fared. Fortunately, she has passed out and was spared the pain of the last half of the ritual. Releasing her bindings, he takes the lithe woman in his arms and carries her outside. She will be exiled soon... this may be the last time he is able to hold her in his arms...

[hGozomi]

A few moments of silence as hGozomi listens to his words, letting them sit in her thoughts before she once more speaks, though this time her voice holds a bit of an accusatory tone.

"To initiate a fight is a cardinal sin then? Tell me, Mr. Dust, for I've been curious about this for a while. I heard from a very good friend of mine - perhaps you know him - Diego Van Derveld... he told me of a small fight you had with a young Lupine; Loklorien s'Ilancy.

"I heard you started that skirmish."



...

The first thing she felt were arms; loving and caring - encircling her and holding her gently. Not at all like those that had held her down as she was being bound. Ghost-white eyes opened slowly, to look up at the man who held her. His face, cast in shadow from his hat, revealed nothing in the way of the emotion she felt through his arms - of course she couldn't see the contours of his features and therefor could only guess.

Emptiness filled her then, as her connection with the force had been severed, and Ice inwardly winced. The ritual had been performed...

... no longer was she a Guardian.

Closing her eyes then, she let her head rest against his arm as he continued to carry her...

[Mr Dust]

The information suprises Dust. How long had she been here in this part of the galaxy?

*I* started that fight? I'll have you know I did not. Provoked it, perhaps. But I did not start it. And, since you are so close with the Van Dervelds, I'm sure you also know that I went back and found Miss s'Ilancy and apologized for stepping up to said provocation.

But on the matter of information... how long have you been here? And why, pray tell, are you keeping company with the Lupines? I mean no disrespect, nor do I intend to judge your actions. I am merely curious as to why.


...

He carries her to the designated transport to take her off planet. He saw her open her eyes as he carried her, but she closed them once more, and had not opened them since. He wanted to look into her eyes... just this once more... before she would be gone from him forever. But apparently, this is not to be.

When they arrive at the transport, he places her gently inside. As he does so, he tucks a small object into her belt. It is an amulet... of the sort given to a betrothed. He was going to ask her just before... all this... happened. He doubts that she would want anything from him, but he might as well give it to her. There will never be another... she was his one and only choice.

Then, with one last look at her, he turns to leave.

[hGozomi]

"The Van Dervelds and I have a loose confidence, if you will. We don't talk too terribly often, but once in a while I am able to provide them with information and they give me the same."

She stared at Dust, canting her head to the side as she regarded him - her eyes in an odd light as both sat opposite eachother. It had been a long time since she'd seen him, and hGozomi knew that while she was here for many things, one of the more prominant reasons for her semi-return was to simply see him once more.

"To answer your last question though, I've been about - nowhere in particular - just... around. I get my information from trusted sources, and they in turn recieve information from myself. It's a rather resourceful symbiosis."



...

Ice didn't know how much time had passed - time was a foreign thing in her frame of mind, but when she was finally able to rouse herself, she was alone. Alone with her thoughts and misgivings. Did she really do the right thing? She had given up everything - the one man she loved, to follow a goal in life that led to her exile.

Leaning forward in her seat as the transport sped through hyperspace, she flinched lightly as something pinched her waist - there was something tucked into her belt, and with trembling fingers she pulled the amulet out. She knew who'd placed it there, and the meaning it held.

And holding it tenderly, Ice, bent over, weeping openly at the love she had seemingly thrown away for an idealogy that consumed her. But in all truthfulness, she hadn't. He would be the only one she would ever want.

[Mr Dust]

He is not terribly suprised by her choice of company. All throughout their time together, she had always seemed to empathize with the Lupines. Choosing them as her new friends was no real shock.

I have to ask... why did you not try to find me earlier? I searched for you once, but since no one on our homeworld knew of your final destination and because of my duties, my search was terribly unfruitful.

A sudden thought comes to his mind. Has she ever searched for him? And for that matter, why is she here now? She seems cordial enough, but it would be understandable if she were to harbor a grudge...

Wait... why have you come to me now? Do you hold malice within your heart for me even now? I am sorry for what happened... sorrier still for what I had to do to you. I wish it had been myself, instead of you.

He grows silent and closes his eyes as the memories from the past flood into him. Old wounds re-open as he remembers seeing her leave so long ago. He recalls how he wept for hours, alone in his quarters, mourning the loss. Her return now is almost overwhelming. He unconsciously reaches to his chest, feeling the small amulet under his suit. It is a pointed-oval shape, roughly an inch long. Guardian men wear such things to signify their marriage to another. They are usually silver in color, representing both the Guardian's work and the purity of his love for his mate. In his case it is black. Black signifies "widower". He has considered himself one since that fateful day. After several moments, he breathes deeply and opens his eyes.

I must know your intentions toward me, Ice. Are you here to settle an old debt, or perhaps... ?

He cannot even finish the sentence. The chance to reconcile is almost too much to begin to hope for. The mere thought chokes the words from him.

[hGozomi]

It was was somewhat peaceful, to see him once more, and hGozomi let herself relapse momentarily - back to how things used to be. Her eyes take on the look they had when she used to look at him, and her head dips as she considers his words.

"... No, I'm not here to settle old debts, Mr. Dust. I come to you now because I felt the need - I wanted to see you once more, if only for a few hours. I honestly expected you to turn me away."

As an afterthought she bit her lip. "I... didn't try to find you because I was afraid of what would happen - that you would not wish to see me again."

With slow, deliberate motions, the albino pulled an amulet from beneath her shirt; the amulet he had given her just before the transport took her. Unlike Dust's, hers is not black - in fact, it's silver. hGozomi herself had never even considered to take on another to love, and she had always considered him her one and only. But now; now she wanted to know once and for all, if he still considered her. That he had searched for her was comforting in its own way, and she couldn't help but feel a warmth spread through her chest.

And yet, she knew in her heart that she could never truly fit in - as if she ever could.

"Thank you for seeing me," she whispered, looking down at the table, unable to meet his gaze, "And thank you for your parting gift... "

[Mr Dust]

Her kind words are shocking to him. Perhaps she did realize that he did not want her harmed. Maybe she knew how he really felt... how he has always felt.

Turn you away? I never could. You should know that. I could never do such a thing...

When she draws the amulet, his heart nearly stops. She had kept it all these years! The blood suddenly rushes through his body as the realization hits him. He hears her final words, and senses she is ready to leave. He can't let that happen... not now, not when he's so close. He makes up his mind to do something he has never done before. Removing his left glove, he reaches out and takes hold of her chin, turning her face up to look at him. Once she is staring into his eyes once more, he releases her chin and reaches to his chest. With the same slowness she used, he brings his black amulet into the light.

I... I considered myself a widower after I lost you... I could never bring myself to even consider another. In a way, it is as if part of myself died. But now...

He drops his amulet to let it rest on his chest and once more reaches out to her. This time he takes the small silver amulet in his fingers.

You know... this does not necessarily have to be a parting gift...

[hGozomi]

A soft smile as he spoke, and hGozomi let her eyes close slowly, leaning forward so that their foreheads touched. To be near him once more, to forget about her past transgressions...

"You don't know how badly I want to come back to you - but... it's just that what I've devoted my life to... I know you can't accept it... "

Her hands went to his then, and she let her fingertips lightly graze his. It'd been so long since she'd ever been near him, let alone touch his hand, that with a sharp intake of breath the albino pulled back suddenly, away from Mr. Dust.

"I'm... I'm sorry to step out of line like that... "

[Mr Dust]

The feeling of her... being so close. It is rapture. He breathes in her scent deeply; it is a scent he thought he would never smell again. That alone brings back myriad memeories...

So caught up in the moment, he almost doesn't notice as she pulls away. Without even thinking, he reaches out and takes hold of both her hands.

Apologize for nothing. You committed no wrong. We are not on the homeworld now. No one frowns upon such things... least of all me.

He releases her slowly, when he is sure she will not run away. His mind registers the earlier statement about "what I've devoted my life to."

What is it that you have become involved with?

[hGozomi]

The feel of his hands holding hers is wonderful, and hGozomi bit her lip in the first signs of nervousness. "I... it's just... my alliegence to the Lupines - I suppose I was afraid you'd not want to associate with me because of that."

The last thing she wanted was to stand between him and his duty, and as he releases her, hGozomi senses that he only let her go because he was sure she would not leave. Just the thought flooded her with memories of how things used to be.

In a quick movement, she leans forward, across the table to graze her lips against his. It is a fleeting moment, but one that she hoped would linger on for both of them

Sweeping her form back, out of the chair, she stood - a sense of longing in her eyes as she looked at him.

"I'm sorry," she whispered once more, like a ghost from their past.

[Mr Dust]

He starts to shake his head when she mentions her alliegance to the Lupines, to signify that that is not too terribly an issue to be worked through. Before he can move, however, her lips touch his. His eyes shoot wide at the sensation as both his emotions and, seemingly, his entire nervous system seem to explode.

She pulls away quickly, but Dust dares not move for fear of losing that incredible feeling. He is shocked from his revelry when he sees her stand and suddenly start apologizing again. Not willing to let her leave like this, he makes a very rash action.

Rising to his feet in a flash, he takes her in his arms and kisses her as he's always meant to. The years of pent-up emotion flow out through the kiss as every thought and dream he has experienced about her through the years comes to a head.

He finally releases her after what seems like ages. For him, time stood still as he kissed her. The hope of her return, once dead, flares to life strongly within him. He does not care what has happened in the interim now. All he knows is that he will find a way to bring her back, if any way exists. He will not stop looking for a way until his dying breath. And perhaps not even then. He locks eyes with her once more.

Now... why are you with the Lupines? What binds you to them?

[hGozomi]

His show of emotion was surprising, and hGozomi couldn't help but become lost in his embrace - and his kiss. Never in their time before she left had he ever shown such a display of physical closeness... and she loved it. It was so unexpected that all she could do was respond in kind.

As they seperated, she remained close to him, unable to take her eyes from his as he spoke.

It was strange - finding herself unable to break the gaze - but she still pulled back just a bit, her hands running from his shoulders and over his chest to once more fall to her side.

"... I bind myself to them," she said quietly, "to give them a chance for survival. To help them against the Guardians."

[Mr Dust]

Dust nods slowly, coming back to himself. Normally, he would have never reacted that way. Now, however... he saw no reason not to. It has been too long since he saw her last. After being away from her for so long, he could not hold himself back.

But now to deal with the problem at hand...

I see. I cannot say I am suprised at your action. But I am curious... what do you mean by "bind"? How are you bound to them?

Also... you need not worry about their survival. They thrive in this part of the galaxy. Their clan has grown by several members in the short time I have been here. In fact, the young woman you mentioned earlier, Ms. s'Ilancy, was made Lupine against her will. Not to mention, I have come to an understanding with her. She seems extremely... non-violent for a Lupine. For that reason, I have no reason whatsoever to attack her. Nor would any other Guardian.

He ponders his next thought for a moment.

Why the concern for their survival? In the centuries our order has existed, the number of Lupines has not decreased at all. It has remained stable all this time. Why worry that they will die out?

[hGozomi]

She let out a long breath, looking down to the ground momentarily. For a few minutes she said nothing, collecting her thoughts while mulling over what he'd said.

"Regardless of whether she was made a Lupine against her will, it seems that she rather embraces the life... so I hardly think that she was a victim in any way. Granted, I'm happy that you have a sort of friendship with her - the first I've heard of between a Lupine and a Guardian - but that just proves my point. Not all of them are inherently evil.

"I've seen good Lupines die at the hands of Guardians, and each time it broke my heart because I knew them personally, yet never did anything about it. What makes a Lupine who kills innocents any different than a man who murders his family? And yet, it seems that they are singled out - goaded to fight in some cases..."

She looked at him then, a stern gaze that reminded him that he had done that very same thing.

"I'm concerned for the survival of those that aren't how the Guardians have painted them - as ruthless killers."

[Mr Dust]

He takes in her words carefully.

Yes... that is true. Some of us have goaded fights. As have the Lupines. And I'm sure you're aware that not all fights end in death. Many times, perhaps even MOST of the time, the fight ends when the Lupine backs down. On the other hand, Guardians are almost never given that luxury.

He pauses once more. Suddenly, an idea comes to him.

It is true that the Guardians have painted the Lupines in a somewhat unfavorable light at times. But if you truly want to change that, why not make the change from the inside? You could return to the Guardians... petition the council. I always told you that you could have done that in the past... with the current experience with them, you would be ideal for a liason between the Guardians and the Lupines... don't you think?

[hGozomi]

The albino took a small step back, folding her hands before her and bowing her head - as if the mention of their homeworld caused a sense of feaer in her.

"I'm an outcast; remember? Besides. It would break the fragile trust I have from the Lupine clans as it is. I can't risk breaking it."

She looked up to him then, her ghost-white eyes resolute.

"I was sent away for something I believed in; stripped because I held true to my beliefs. As it stands, I'm very happy where I am...

"... I write music, and help the Lupines that come to me. I live peacefully for the most part... "

Idly, she reached out to let her fingers trace the contours of the amulet he wore, "... and now I've seen you again."

A soft smile, "I suppose it's all I can ask for."

[Mr Dust]

He steps forward with her as she tries to move away. He can't let her withdraw into herself again...

You were exiled... that much is true. And to many, you were outcast. But none of this happened for your beliefs. Others on the homeworld disdained fighting, fighting with Lupines or otherwise. Some became healers or trainers, some simply did not become active Guardians.

No, you were not sent away for your beliefs. You were sent away because you aided in the deaths of four good men. The Council, however, may still forgive you. As for the Lupines, is there nothing you can say to convince them otherwise? If you still help them from the inside of the order, why not try?

He watches her touch his amulet, and his demeanor changes. He appers to soften, as if all his barriers have fallen. Gently, as if afraid she will run away from him, he takes hold of her hand.

Please, Ice... at least try. I thought you were lost to me forever. I... I do not think I could bear losing you a second time.

[hGozomi]

Her shoulders slumped then, and hGozomi inhaled deeply. "I'll come back... on my own terms... "

His hold on her hand caused her to falter almost, but she went on. "I'm not ready to see the Council in any way, and in all truthfulness, I wouldn't mind never seeing them again."

She looked up at him them, her eyes once more returning to their hard edged manner of before.

"I have no intentions of stopping what I do in any way - just remember that. I would prefer to remain an indeendant entity at all costs."

[Mr Dust]

The pain in his eyes is evident, but he composes himself otherwise.

I... can understand your reluctance. I am sorry for the... forcefulness of my attempted persuasion. I seem to have gotten carried away with myself.

He pauses and takes a deep breath.

Know that I will be waiting for you when you are ready to return. If you need any help with anything, you need only ask.

[hGozomi]

A blank look passed over her delicate features at first, then a smile. "You misunderstand me, Mr. Dust.

"What I mean to say is that I'm willing to help you out here; rejoin in a manner of speaking - it's just that I'd like to not return to the homeworld just yet."

A soft hand went up to his cheek, patting it lightly before she once more sat down at the table. "Does that better help ease your mind?"

[Mr Dust]

Indeed it does. But you must have also misunderstood me. I did not mean the Homeworld Council. I meant the Jedi Council here on Coruscant. They would have the same authority to return you to the Jedi. Remember, the Homeworld Council was always second to the main Jedi Council.

And yes... it does ease my mind. But I still wonder... what EXACTLY is it that you do with the Lupines? You have yet to be clear on the issue.

[hGozomi]

At the mention of the Jedi Council, her eyes dropped. It wasn't that she didn't want to see them... but for now, things were better being simple.

"Is there any way I could avoid seeing the Jedi at this point?"

When she looked back up, the look in her eyes was soft, full of renewed adoration, yet also held an apprehensive apology somewhat.

"Please... I know you have a lot to be mad at me about, but spare me just this once... "

[Mr Dust]

With the utmost of tenderness, he reaches out and covers her hands with his own.
Ice... of course you may wait... I don't wish to push you into anything.

She begins her apology, and his heart almost breaks. Her, apologizing to him? How? Raising one hand, he cups her chin with his hand, locking his gaze to hers, opening himself to her as he never has before. His voice chokes with emotion as he speaks.

Ice... please. I want you to look at me and know that I speak the truth, and I want you to listen carefully to what I am about to say. There is nothing... nothing that you have to apologize to me about. There never has been. I forgave you for your actions on our homeworld the moment I heard of them. It is I who must ask your forgiveness. Ever since that... that terrible day... I have carried a burden that I thought would overcome me. And now, I ask you to release me from it. Can you ever forgive me for what I did? I should have... I should have refused, and joined you in exile... or even death. I was too weak to do so. I... I am sorry.

His head droops as the emotion overtakes him. One small drop hits the table... the first tear he has shed since that day.

[hGozomi]

His show of emotion is somewhat amazing, and hGozomi pulled one of her hands from his, reaching across the table to his face. Fingers gently touched his cheek, wiping the tear away before she herself leaned forward, her voice soothing as she whispered low to him....

"I forgive you...

"... Dustanthis... "

[Mr Dust]

Her touch is like a soothing balm, calming the raging fire of regret and loss that he has carried for so long. As she wipes away the tear, so she seems to wipe away his pain. But the use of his True Name shocks him to the core. His eyes shoot open in the realization. To a Guardian, even an outcast like Ice, the True Name is used only in the most solemn of statements. For her to use it, he has no doubts as to her sincerity. It is all he can do to not to weep in relief. When he regains his breath, he speaks once more.

How long have I waited... dreamed... of hearing those words from you.

He pauses for a moment, measuring his words.

Izscelion... where do we go from here?

[hGozomi]

"Where do we go?"

hGozomi let her own eyes soften as he used her own True Name, and she couldn't help the small breath of contentment that escaped her lips. His mental chains - it seemed - fell from his shoulders, and she now looked upon him with a gentle gaze. So different than through the look of hurt love that she had last seen him.

"Where do you want to go?

"I came here for the strict purpose of simply seeing you - I had no intentions otherwise until... until... "

She trailed away then, looking to the side - her eyes gaining a far-off look as they seemed to study nothing in particular...

"... until I actually saw you."

[Mr Dust]

He smiles broadly, a smile full of honest and good-natured joy. The incredible relief gained from her forgiveness transitions to almost unbridled happiness.

I know how you feel. I came here to enjoy a cup of tea and bask in the sunset. How was I to know I would find the other half of my heart?

He pauses once more, suddenly pensive. He wishes to ask her a question, but fears her answer. He looks away, shyness showing in his face. After several moments and many deep breaths, he turns back.

Would... would you be willing to... to stay with me?

[hGozomi]

It certainly wasn't something that she was expecting, and the albino turned to look at him sharply, taken off-guard. His request, while surprising, was met with an easy smile as she canted her head, staring at him.

"... stay with you?"

It was something she never thought could happen, and hGozomi felt like once more she'd been given a second chance - a second chance to be with the one man she'd always felt truly accepted by. Eyes locking with his, she only managed to nod her head, the shock of his query still strong.

[Mr Dust]

His breath catches in his chest as he waits for her answer. Indeed, it seems as if his very heart has paused its beating as she thinks.

But then, with that one nod of her head, time starts back up again. The world around him seems bright and new... colors are more vibrant, scents more full and rich, sounds like music. He feels as if his heart is once more whole.

The joy is so great he can scarcely believe it. He stammers out a response.

You... you realize what I am asking, do you not? I ask you to stay with me permanently, as... as...

[hGozomi]

"I know what you asked me," she whispered, "and I can't tell you how long I've wished to hear those words - even if they were simply in a dream... "

She looked to him, her hands reaching out to hold his own.

"... but... but this isn't a dream... "

[Mr Dust]

Indeed... it is not a dream.

He holds even more tightly onto her hand. His face nearly beams in joy. After the intensity of the last few moments conversation, he feels as if he has run for hours. The emotion seems to have taken a bit of a toll on Ice as well.

Now then... where shall the ceremony take place?

He attempts to dead-pan the comments, but the twinkle in his eye belies his jesting.

Perhaps here? We could invite our closest friends. Guardians on my side, Lupines on yours. Of course, I doubt Diego Van Derveld would look very fetching in a maid's gown. Perhaps with a haircut... and a veil. A LARGE veil...

[hGozomi]

hGozomi only offered a small smile and slight laugh, trying her best to not picture the elder Lupine in such a get-up.

"Somehow I highly doubt Diego would want to come to such an event... "

She blinked, resting her elbows more on the table. "Wherever you wish to have it held is up to you. I'll be happy either way - as long... " she paused, as if showing such emotion was a foreign thing - though in a way it was, as she hadn't been with anyone since the days before her exile, "... as long as you're there... "

[Mr Dust]

The sight of her smile is extremely welcome. He had missed that, among a thousand other nuances. He had missed her more than he knew.

Yes... I agree... I doubt he would be very agreeable to it either. From what I know of him, I can't see it being his cup of tea, so to speak.

He hears her last words and does what he can to reassure her.

Izscelion... I will always... always be there for you. As long as I draw breath, I will be there. As long as you will have me, I am yours.

[hGozomi]

Her eyes closed, and hGozomi sighed in relief. To hear his voice - his words - she felt whole once more. For all these years, it'd seemed like she'd been living life with only half of her soul... the other half had been left behind seemingly with her past.

Looking up at him then, over the tops of her eyes, she gripped his hands tight.

"And as long as you will have me, I am yours."

[Mr Dust]

To Dust, this is a dream come true. Finally, he has found the woman that he lost so long ago.

Then I would like to keep you for quite some time. Forever, in fact.

He smiles widely at her. He reaches down to his belt and tugs out a small hidden pouch. Inside is another pendant. This one, however, is fully silver. His smile of happiness becomes more of a self-depricating smirk.

I never did know why I kept this. I always thought to throw it away, and let that part of my life pass. But I never could bring myself to. Call it incurable optimism.

He holds the amulet out to her.

If you would be so kind as to do the honors?
[/i]

[hGozomi]

That he had a silver pendant - still kept it with hom over the years - was a shock to her, and the albino could help the look that crossed her features. It was a mixture of relief and happiness... that he'd never given up on her completely...

"I thought... I thought that you had given up on me - everyone else had - "

And yet, she still took it from his outstretched fingers, holding it gently before looking to his eyes. In them she saw everything she'd ever hoped to see, and that made her heart warm.

"... I'm glad you didn't," she finished, standing to skirt the table. Standing next to him, she crouched by his side, one hand reaching up with slow, deliberate motions, unclipping the thin chain of the black amulet he wore. It came off easily, and she let it slide to his lap. Lifting both arms then, she placed the new pendant around his neck, bringing her own face in close to his as she did so.

"You're the only one that I want," she whispered, latching the small, silver chain so that it rested easily around his neck.

[Mr Dust]

His breath quickens involuntarily as she moves toward him. As the pendant latches onto his neck, he smiles broadly once more.

I never gave up. Nor will I ever, not so long as there is even the barest thread of life within me. I could not do so then, I cannot in the future.

Once the chain is around his neck he raises his arms and gently encircles her waist.

You are the only one I have ever wanted.

[hGozomi]

Rising to her feet, she felt as his hands slide down the side of her body - just the feeling in and of itself is wonderful. Never before had she even dreamed of hoping this day would come - would present itself.

And leaning down, she placed a small kiss at the top of his head as he sat.

"I'm glad," she whispered, "that you will still have me."

Of course her words were a massive understatement, and hGozomi knew it. With a sidelong glance, she look to the meal he'd bought before heading for the table.

"Your food is cold," she said simply - smoothly.

[Mr Dust]

He smiles contentedly at her. When she mentions his food, he chuckles softly.

To be quite frank, my dear, I honestly forgot that it was there. Well... shall we discuss the arrangements, then?

The situation is so unreal, he scarcely believes it is truly happening. He transitions to the arrangements to give himself some time to absorb what is happening. After a few moments, though, he is calm and the urgency is gone from his actions. They will have plenty of time to work this out... all the time in the world.