Excuse me, miss! (Kat Kariena, open)

[Shrin Safserim]

Shrin is headed to the Bar and Grill, not really because he's hungry, but just because he wants to go and see what's happening. His fingers are laced together with his palms resting on the back of his neck, elbows providing counterbalance as he tilts back to observe the dull grey Coruscant skyline. It looks like rain. Suddenly he stumbles to a halt as he bumps into something--or rather, someone--knocking that person over. Looking down, he sees he's run into a rather beautiful woman. He offers a hand with a sheepish smile.

"Excuse me, miss. I'm sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going. Are you alright?"

[Kat Kariena]

It had been a while since Kat had visited Coruscant, trapped in her own thoughts she drifted. Glancing at the skyline she saw the clouds forming. Rain, she thought. To bad it won't ever reach the surface of this planet.

Suddenly she found herself on the ground and shook her head. Looking up smiled a bit at the young man, "Just fine." She accepted his offer of help up and stood back up. "I apologise, I'm afraid I wasn't paying to much attention to where I was going."

[Shrin Safserim]

"Hey, I'm the one who's supposed to be saying that..." he mumbles, still embarrassed to have caused a scene. "Can I buy you a drink?"

He blurts the question, feeling more guilty than he really should about having bowled her over. Shrin just wants to be a gentleman is all.

[Kat Kariena]

Kat tried not to laugh a little at his responce, "Sure," she replied. Now that she was back on her feet her hand went to where her lightsaber usualy hung to make sure it was still there. The woman seemed to have an air of confidance, anyone who had known her before would have noticed it, that is... if they reconized her still.

"My name is Kat Kariena," she spoke to cover her movements, extending her hand.

[Shrin Safserim]

"Shrin," he replies, walking on through the crowd. "Have you ever been to Yoghurt's Bar and Grill?"

[Kat Kariena]

"It's been a while... the last time was just over a year ago, I think," the young woman replied with a nod, walking just a step behind Shrin. The now twenty-five year old woman had come to the Jedi Ordier when she was eighteen. It still amazed her to think it had really been that long. "I used to come in here all the time."

[Shrin Safserim]

"Oh? I like it too. I'm not a Jedi, but in here so much people mistake me for one. I guess it's also my personality...I'd rather not fight or hurt anyone if I could help it."

He holds the door open and bows her in.

"After you, m'lady."

[Kat Kariena]

"Thank you," Kat replied with a slight bow to Shrin before stepping through the door. She smiled a bit at him for his earlier comment, "There are things Jedi do other than fight. Some Jedi are healers, others schollars. Others still are experts in the fighting arts. For most it depends on where their skills and/or interests are."

She half wondered if he thought she was a Jedi or not, but then shrugged the idea off. He was a new face... one that wasn't here when she last appeared, he couldn't have known. She sighed inwardly, so much had changed. Were there any faces she would know in this firmillar place?

[Shrin Safserim]

Shrin unhooks his sword from his belt and hands it over.

"I'm aware that not all Jedi are fighters. If I were a Jedi, I imagine I would fall into the category of the more peaceful ones."

[Kat Kariena]

"Do you choose not to be because you can't be a Jedi, then?" she asked. "Or because you don't feel it's your place at this time?"

The young woman watched him curiously.

[Shrin Safserim]

"I...I'm actually afraid of being turned away," he says with a sheepish smile. "I don't know if I'm Force Sensitive or not."

[Kat Kariena]

"Why are you afraid of being turned away?" she asked, her eyes focused on him with curiousity.

"The Jedi I have known have always welcomed with open arms. I can only think of one, maybe two, incidents in which they didn't. That I can remember, anyway. Both cases had extremely good reasons behind them."

[Shrin Safserim]

"It's a silly fear, I know. But...I just can't bring myself to walk into their Recruitment Center." He shrugs. "I feel sort of cowardly when I think of how stupid it is."

[Kat Kariena]

"Silly, and yet not..." the young woman sighed slightly to herself. I should probably go to the recruitment center and ask to come back myself, she thought, but didn't vocalize it to the young man.

"Sometimes I think it depends on how strong your beliefs are... or what you want to fight for."

[Shrin Safserim]

"Reasons for protecting and joining are such opinionated things though. What one person may consider ot be a good reason could be dismissed by another. It's such a tentative thing. I would like to walk in knowing that my reasons and goals are worthy in the eyes of the Order, but I can't."

[Kat Kariena]

"What are your reasons and goals?" Kat asked. The young woman had once served on the council, years ago it seemed now. While it may have been a while and she was unsure how things may have changed, she wondered if she might be able to have some idea of what they would look for.

"Perhaps I can help," she suggested.

[Shrin Safserim]

"My reasons? Well...I want to prevent harm to anyone and anything, even if I should come to harm in doing so. If I can stop a fight or an attack and have no one be hurt, that would be best."

[Kat Kariena]

"Would it surprise you to hear that those are some of the best reasons to become a Jedi?" she asked, tilting her head slightly with her question. Those were the reasons I had myself once, she thought. Though I also thought I think to much... and I do.

[Shrin Safserim]

"Yes, but usually they get countered with a bunch of Devil's Advocacy, and usually I find it hard to counter. It just seems too idealized at times."

[Kat Kariena]

Kat smiled wryly, "It does seem idealized at times, true, but atleast no one can't say the effort wasn't made, can they?" she asked. "That's the point where you let them talk, say their piece, and walk away, letting them believe what they choose to believe... just like you have choosen to live what you believe."

[Shrin Safserim]

"Yes...I suppose..." Shrin concedes. He feels that he has a counter for this, but can't think of what it might be or how to say it. So he opts to let it go for now.

[Kat Kariena]

Spit it out and chew it up later is the best way, she thought, seeing him hold back a responce. She guessed from being unsure how to phrase it. She let the subject drop as well, instead she changed the subject.

"I apologise if I ask to many questions," she finnaly said after a momment. "It's been a while."

[Shrin Safserim]

Shrin simply shakes his head to dismiss her apology. She doesn't need to be sorry for something perfectly acceptable.

"No worries. I was just about to ask you a question myself. What do you mean when you say that its been a while?"

[Kat Kariena]

The question brought a slight smile to Kat's face, though it seemed a sad one in a way. "I was a Jedi Knight here once," she replied. "Far from being a good one in my own eyes. I made a few mistakes that I'm none to proud of. In all honesty I'm not sure if they'll ever accept me back again, it's been so long."

[Shrin Safserim]

"Everyone makes mistakes. That's a given; it's whether or not we learn from the that matters."

[Kat Kariena]

"Exactly," Kat replied. "However the mistakes I'm made I'm not sure they'll forgive... but it's been a long... long time."

This was perhaps the one point in the conversation where the young woman actualy sounded unsure of herself, or, more exactly, unsure of her future.

[Shrin Safserim]

Shrin feels it would be rude to pry into her personal life, choosing only to offer up a bit of advice before turning the subject.

"You'd be surprised at how forgiving the Jedi can be. I heard a rumor the other day that a former Dark Jedi Knight was recruited into their ranks. If they can forgive a darksider, why could they not forgive you?"

[Kat Kariena]

Kat half smiled at hearing this, "True... I remember being a new Knight when they refused to let one Knight back who had gone Sith."

She shook her head, the memmory being nothing more than that, a memmory. "I guess it's the fear of being like him... even though fear is deffinately not a Jedi trait."

[Shrin Safserim]

"Fear is a trait of anyone. It's the ability to not to be controlled by one's fear that is a Jedi trait."

[Kat Kariena]

Kat nodded in agreement to his point. "Give the guy a point he out did me this time," she replied her voice betraying her amusement at being out done by Shrin. "Hazzards of being only human, I guess."

[Shrin Safserim]

"Yes. It's not that we try to simply stop these emotions. It's that we learn to yield with them, and turn their energies away from us."

[Kat Kariena]

OOC: I'm sorry for it being so long, lost internet access for the last week... no I havn't dissapeared again ^_^

IC:

"We do the best we can, but we all fail at one point or another, that's what makes us grow," Kat replied then sighed mentaly. You've come a long way, Kat, she thought and shook her head at herself. Will you ever forgive yourself?

[Shrin Safserim]

"That's exactly right," Shrin says as he stands and stretches. "Now let's go see about this problem of yours, shall we?"

[Kat Kariena]

Kat stood after him and blinked, What problem? she asked in her thoughts, but didn't voice out loud. Or better to the point... which problem.

How many holes have you dug for yourself this time, Kat?

[Shrin Safserim]

Shrin extends a hand with a warm smile.

"Come on. Let's go ahead and deal with this."

[Kat Kariena]

Leap of faith, path of trust. Life to life, dust to dust, Kat throught before she took Shrin's hand and followed him.

"Which problem are we dealing with?" she asked with a wry smile.

[Shrin Safserim]

"I'm going to take you to the Jedi Recruitment Center and lay your fear of rejection to rest. You will see. They will forgive you."

[Kat Kariena]

Kat made a face, but didn't object, she simply went with him. You need to face this, Kat. It's not the council's forgiveness you really need... it's your own.

That's something I can never give...

Maybe someday.