Old Times(Sasha)

[Judas Escariot]

Soon after his acceptance in the Order Judas headed to his room. Half way there he noticed Sasha what seemed to be his private quarters. He quietly shadowed at Sasha's door.

[SashaKovalev]

Sasha always left his door open. He lived at the very end of the hallway, across from Feliciana’s room, and so it wasn’t often that there was traffic, unless someone was exploring, or searching. Not to mention, he was a social kid who rather preferred the interactions with others to the silence of his room.

It was easy to recognize the signature of the one he had spoken with in the recruitment center, and he paused for a moment, looking up from the lightsaber he was constructing for an apprentice of his. When the figure didn’t leave, but seemed lost in indecision, he called out.

“You can come in, you know.”

[Judas Escariot]

Not suprised that he was noticed he proceeded.

"Well I guess were family now, we should get along," he said in a sarcastic tone of voice, "So I see you are constructing a similar device that I have. Will you care to teach me how to contruct this weapon?"

[SashaKovalev]

As Judas walked into the room, Sasha looked to him.

Well I guess were family now, we should get along

He felt his shoulders tighten with the sarcasm but said nothing in return. Instead he merely put another piece together in the lightsaber. If this continued, he would speak with Lady Vader, and then he would teach this one a lesson. He had had enough.

So I see you are constructing a similar device that I have. Will you care to teach me how to construct this weapon?

At this request, Sasha looked up from the saber.

“If you can chill out on the sarcasm, yeah, I’d be happy to.” He replied.

Back when he’d first joined, he’d struggled many times to construct his own. It had eluded him time and time again. Now, it was amusing to him that he’d had such a difficult time.

He still used the saber Mu had given to him. He would use it forever, it was likely. He wasn’t big on material things, but that particular saber had meaning to him. And he wouldn’t replace it with another.

[Judas Escariot]

If you can chill out on the sarcasm, yeah, I’d be happy to.

"Hey, hey simmer down old friend, I was merely toying with you," he quickly replied, "Ok, so we started on the wrong foot did we? He looks around and approached Sasha and asked, "So, may I join you?," he looked around for an available seat.

[SashaKovalev]

Hey, hey simmer down old friend, I was merely toying with you. Ok, so we started on the wrong foot did we?

You bet we did, Sasha thought, though he kept these thoughts to himself, under a well practiced lock on his mind.

So, may I join you?

Sasha nodded, pointing to a chair in the corner.

“Yeah, just pull that one up.” He replied. After Judas had done so, Sasha finally stopped what he was doing and looked to him

“Why do you keep referring to me as if I should know you?” He finally asked, going directly to the point.

[Judas Escariot]

Sasha looked into his eyes and Judas started to reminance that memory again.....

Sasha: Come Judas stop being a woose!
Judas: I don't think we should being doing this.
Sasha: Aaah get over it.

Speeder engine ignites...

Judas: Whoa, hey wait what are doing!

He zoomed back to Sasha's eyes...,"Don't you remember, the speeder," he said with a look of suprise,"You were always energetic, making do things I didn't like to do..."

[SashaKovalev]

There was much of Sasha’s life that he didn’t remember. What stuck out the most to him was not remembering his father. But now, things like this were also beginning to stand out.

Sasha looked away for a moment, and then back to Judas. He was struggling to remember, wanting to know pieces about a life he had not known until recently. He hated this about his life, hated that there were years of his life that seemed to be erased from memory.

“Maybe you could tell me more.” Sasha suggested, his voice oddly quiet as he then stared down at a piece to the lightsaber, giving it more attention than a simple piece such as that one needed.

[Judas Escariot]

Judas felt him, his pain, his fustration. A bit of compassion ran though Judas' body and spoke to Sasha in an easier manner.

"Do you remember the accident? The speeder? Remember when we took the speeder from that spaceport in the Outer Rim?"

[SashaKovalev]

Do you remember the accident? The speeder? Remember when we took the speeder from that spaceport in the Outer Rim?

An accident? A speeder they had taken? His gaze moved to the window for a moment.

Had this happened? How old had he been? He had to have been younger. It had to have been.

He could remember very clearly from the time he was ten or so. Could remember it because it was the first time he remembered seeing his mother cry.

He stood suddenly, his anger at himself, at his mother and father, at the Templis Cult that had caused all of this building to the point that he didn’t want to keep it contained.

He hurled the beginnings of the lightsaber at the wall, and there several unsecured pieces clattered to the floor, followed by the finely crafted metal of the hilt.

“What accident?!” He demanded, turning on Judas.

[Judas Escariot]

Judas was startled. He realized that Sasha did not remember, then, it was clear...the accident.

"Sasha..., the accident, you don't remember," he eplaied.

As Judas eplains to Sasha what happened, Sasha began to have short flashbacks.

You thought that speeder was so cool

Sasha: Come Judas stop being a woose!
Judas: I don't think we should being doing this.
Sasha: Aaah get over it.

Speeder engine ignites...

Judas: Whoa, hey wait what are doing!

Then, it happened

CRASH

We crashed into a ship salvage. I can still remember how you looked that day. You hit your head...you were bleeding. That was the last time I saw you. They all came to see you. I ran away in fear...

[SashaKovalev]

There were pieces that seemed familiar to the story. Oddly familiar. Pictures flashed in his mind, perhaps flashbacks, though the boy in them was not familiar to him just yet. Not even the one he looked upon and knew to be himself.

It was frustrating, and only served to anger him more. He was a kid prone to violence when angered. It had always set him apart from his friends. It was why he had known that he was different from the others. It was why his mother had tried so hard to prevent him from knowing anything about who he was and where he had come from.

We crashed into a ship salvage. I can still remember how you looked that day. You hit your head...you were bleeding. That was the last time I saw you. They all came to see you. I ran away in fear...

Anything. He wanted anything to throw. It was juvenile, he knew, but he couldn’t help it. The picture frame that sat on his desk, the one taken of Feliciana on their trip to Naboo shattered to pieces only moments later as the pillow that he hurled knocked it off the desk onto the floor.

“No, I don’t remember.” He spat, violet eyes filled with rage.

“I don’t remember any of it.” He added, a sense of almost desperation suggested in the tone of his voice. He sat down on his bed, a hand coming to rub his forehead with the headache that had seemed to come.

“What happened after that? Why did we never speak again until now?” He finally asked, calming himself enough to ask.

[Judas Escariot]

Judas slowly pushed his seat in front of Sasha.

"After the accident you recieved some medical attention, I went to visit you but your mother ranted at me that it was all my fault that you were in those conditions. She sent me away but I couldn't bear to abandon a good friend."

Judas reached to his cloak and handed out a familiar talisman.

"You gave this half of the talisman and kept the other piece to symbolize our friendship before the accident. So I came around your window and jumped in. When I went to to see you, you were enraged. You said you didn't know me, and even if you did you would never have any association with a twerp like me."

Judas proceeded to pick up Sasha lightsabre pieces and handed them to Sasha's hands.

"So I did what any friend would of done, I kept my half of the talisman and left hoping that you would change one day. I came about a time later and I found out you were gone. So then, here we are united for some twist of fate."

Judas seated back into his chair and looked at Sasha.

[SashaKovalev]

He accepted the pieces of the saber as he listened to the story. Half of him wondered if he had always been so tempermental as he was now, or if he had been a new person after this accident. The other half of him refused to care, and wanted only to know who he was now, for his past, it seemed, continued only to bring him more and more sadness.

He turned the pieces over and over in his hands, idly slipping them back into place in the hilt for something to distract him. It was soothing, putting this puzzle together, for a saber could be built, and each piece would have its set place. Unlike his life, with so many pieces missing, and others not fitting in where he felt that they should.

“Im sorry that I don’t remember.” He finally offered. He sighed softly, looking away, his violet eyes troubled.

And then he looked back to the hilt of the saber before looking to Judas.

“Perhaps we can start over.” He suggested.

[Judas Escariot]

Judas smiled. As he revealed the talisman.

"We made the promise along time ago. Till the end my friend."

[SashaKovalev]

On another ship. In another place in the galaxy…….
Sasha reached out to take the talisman for a moment. He stared down at it. It felt familiar as he held it in his hand, yet he knew he did not any longer have something like this.

He had grown up with few possessions to call his own. And when he’d left the small planet on the outer rim where he grew up, he’d left most everything behind, wanting to forget the life he’d lived and move on.

And move on he had. His life now was strikingly different. He had grown into an intelligent young man, who was reaping the rewards of a belief in the dark side. The Sith order took care of him well, and finally, he was coming into a bit of his own wealth – earned from his hard work and training. And one day, this would go towards buying a ship of his own.

This thought brought him back to the speeder. So he had stolen a speeder. This almost amused him, for it certainly ran parallel to his love of ships and speed.

Finally, he handed it back to Judas.

“Perhaps fate knew what she was doing." He stated, and with a slow smile, stood and held out his hand to Judas, as if in official welcoming to the order.

“Now we’re more than friends. We’re brothers.”

[Judas Escariot]

Finally the life in the past they had has now been reborn.

He returned his hand in agreement.

"Then brothers we will be..."

[SashaKovalev]

After they had shaken hands, Sasha looked at the lightsaber pieces he still held in his hand.

He looked to Judas.

“You still want to know how to construct one yourself?” He offered.

[Judas Escariot]

"Sure, I have all the time in the world," he replied in agreement.

[SashaKovalev]

Sasha shook his head. Time was one thing he did not have enough of. At least, not for the things he wanted to have time for.

“You got a master yet?” He asked as he stood to gather all the pieces and spread them out in front of the two of them.

[Judas Escariot]

"No, I don't..."

Judas paused for a moment and thought.

"Can you be one, ya'know a master to someone...?"

[SashaKovalev]

He nodded.

"Yeah, I could. I am, actually." He replied, though the tone of his voice seemed to indicate that being a master was more of a chore to him than something he truly enjoyed.

He did it because it was expected of him, and because he knew it would maybe help when it came to being promoted.

He didnt mind sharing his knowledge with others, but most of his experience as a master so far had seemed to him more work than a sharing of a mastery of skills. Just for once, he thought, it would be nice to have an apprentice that took some sort of initiative to come to him with what they wanted to learn, not for him to have to go to them and plot out the plan for the day.

"Why?" He asked as he craftfully connected another piece within the hilt of the saber.

[Judas Escariot]

"Well I was wondering," he paused, " Would you mind if you were to instruct me in the sith arts?. I really haven't picked anyone so I was curious if you had the time..."

He handed Sasha one of the parts of the lightsabre and noticed where he assemble it in the hilt.

[SashaKovalev]

After he’d put the next piece in place, he stopped and looked to Judas.

“You’d want me to teach you?” He asked, an eyebrow raised curiously. He was quiet for a moment, in thought, for their start had been rocky. But they had just agreed to a new beginning…. And he supposed, the best way to show that he meant this would be to help his sith brother to learn.

Slowly, he nodded.

“I don’t have much time lately, it seems…but if you’re willing to work hard, then I’m willing to make the time to help you learn.”

He picked up another piece, and eyed it for a minute before he set it down and chose another very similar to it. He set them both in front of Judas.

“Tell me, why would you choose one over the other?” He asked.

[Judas Escariot]

“Tell me, why would you choose one over the other?”

Judas looked at Sasha's hand and took one of the pieces. He examined it and took the other out of Sasha's opposite hand.

"I don't know, they're similar...how would I?"

He handed the pieces back to Sasha.

[SashaKovalev]

He nodded.

"Yes, they are similar. But..not completely." The young knight replied.

"Try looking at them from a different perspective. Not with your eyes, for your eyes will lie to you more often than not, but by feel."

He placed each of them in Judas's hands.

"Close your eyes if you need to, and tell me what you feel, instead of what you see." He commanded, his voice carrying the tone of a patient older brother.

[Judas Escariot]

Judas took the items and closed his eyes...

"Well..., I feel...like one is warmer than the other, one is a bit heavier, and one is rougher, but I don't understand how would I pick from one another. Such a vague question my brother," he replied to Sasha in a bewildered kind of way but was very curious what he can learn from this lesson.

Judas' eyes still remained closed...waiting for a knowlegeable reply...he was always eager to learn new things everyday.

[SashaKovalev]

Sasha smiled slightly.

"These things are true. But the things you're trying to feel are purely physical. Move beyond physical - search your feelings, seek your instincts." He urged.

"Search deeper, and tell me which piece you would choose to use."

Instinct and the connection to the force would tell Judas. And later, Sasha would teach him how to tune into the force for such things. How to make those instincts call out to him, and come to him with ease.

It was a long process, and took time and effort to bring oneself in tune with the force, to learn to use it, command it - control it. But in time, Sasha would help Judas unlock these abilities that were hidden deep within him.

[Judas Escariot]

Judas took both pieces and looked at them. Little that Judas know that he was always a force savant but never understood how he did certain things. It was like instinct to him to make things just happen for the better of him.

He closed his eyes and the whole room was pure silent. In a matter of moments he replied once more.

"I...I pick this one, I don't know...but I don't understand why I would pick this piece. Something...a feeling pushes me towards this specific one," Judas said as he kept the chosen one and handed the one he didn't want back to Sasha.

[SashaKovalev]

I...I pick this one, I don't know...but I don't understand why I would pick this piece. Something...a feeling pushes me towards this specific one.

Sasha nodded at this in approval.

“You’ve chosen that one because the force has told you to.”

He held up the piece that Judas had given back to him.

“This piece had a hairline crack in the center of it. It would be utterly useless.” He explained.

“That piece,” He motioned to the one that Judas held, “has nothing wrong with it."

He turned the piece over and over in his hand for a moment.

“In time, you’ll learn to use the force, you’ll be able to control it enough that you will know exactly why one piece would be better than the other. And so much more.”

He reached for the piece that Judas held, and then gave the faulty piece back to him.

“Concentrate on this piece for a moment.” He suggested.

“If you close your eyes, and relax for a moment, let the force come to you, you will begin to feel it. You might even see the crack Ive told you about…”

For now, he would work on helping Judas to learn control over the force – later, he would teach him to use his anger to tap into the dark side – where all the power lay waiting for use.

[Judas Escariot]

Judas concentrated on the piece...it did felt a bit odd than the other. He had begun to understand the meaning of the Force a bit more now. He was a amazed of the things he did not noticed to understand in his past, his open mind and Sasha's teachings, he foresees a great future in The Sith Order.

[SashaKovalev]

He could feel Judas as he concentrated.

“Open yourself to the force.” He urged quietly.

“It feels different to everyone, but mostly, its something you begin to feel flowing through you. It flows as your blood does through your veins, only you can feel it as it travels through.” He added, trying to use as many methods as possible to help Judas realize this power locked within him.

“When you do that, you’ll see not only through your eyes, but through your senses.”

[Judas Escariot]

He examined the piece once more...then suddenly he felt as if he was in the item itself. Finally, he saw it as day, there in the piece he saw the defect it had a hairline of a crack...the piece was totally useless. He realized that small things can make a large difference. Sure it seemed like just a small pointless gash but it was sure not reusable.

The question was, how would this experiment benefit him in the future?

"What is the lesson here my brother?"

[SashaKovalev]

Sasha leaned back in his seat, a small smile coming to his face for a moment.

"Dont use defective saber parts." He replied with a small shrug, and then his expression sobered slightly.

"What have you learned from it so far?" He questioned in return. He would not give answers away. Judas would have to work for them.

[Judas Escariot]

"Dont use defective saber parts."

Judas laughed at the remark. He understood the lesson after a couple of moments.

"Well I learned, besides broken lightsabres, is that sometimes the smallest thing in the world, even the invisible ones, can make a great difference. Detail is important and should be never overlooked. Besides this type of thinking can probably save my life one day. I guess this train of thought can benefit me in my further training my brother," he replied to Sasha returning to item back.

[SashaKovalev]

Nodding, Sasha accepted the defective part and then tossed it into the waste basket. It was worth virtually nothing to keep, particualrly now that the lesson had been learned.

"You would be wise to keep that in mind. You would be wise, also, to remember to open yourself as you just did, moments ago. When in doubt, use your sense in the force to guide you."

He continued to construct the saber, pointing out here and there why certain parts belonged where, and the other details that could be added to a saber if one had the inclination to do so.

"How did it feel to you, when you were finally able to see the crack I was telling you about?" He asked.

He was not looking for an emotional response, but rather, the physical aspects. To know this would help in the future to help Judas draw out the force as it flowed within him.

[Judas Escariot]

"How did it feel to you, when you were finally able to see the crack I was telling you about?"

Judas thought of the question. Then, he remembered how he felt when he spotted the crack. He felt...

"Heat...," he replied,"A whole lot of heat. I felt like I was burning...., overheating. My heart was pounding vigoriously, and I felt my palms sweating."

He said this as he looked at his hands.

[SashaKovalev]

Sasha nodded.

“In time, it will feel more comfortable than that. It will still be warm, of course, but it will be less distracting and disconcerting and more…” He paused, searching for the perfect word to explain.

“It will feel like a warm blanket settling over you. And in time, you will grow addicted to it. The key is to control this addiction, and to never let your lust for this feeling lead to down a path of destruction of yourself.”

He took the lightsaber in his hand and stood, walking a few feet away from the desk. He slid the last piece into place and then ignited it. The blade was an odd green color, and for a moment, Sasha stared at it, lost in the light of the saber.

And then he disengaged it, and looked to Judas.

“Do you wish to feel it again? The force…?” He asked.

[Judas Escariot]

Judas a bit intimidated...and nodded...

"Yes, I do, my brother," he replied nervously.

He stood in front of Sasha and felt that burning sensation again. He felt the radiation off the beam of light of the sabre and watched Sasha's eyes commence to gleam.

[SashaKovalev]

Sasha heard the hint of nervousness in Judas’s voice as he responded.

“I am not scolding you.” He began.

“But I heard the nervousness in your voice. And while I understand why you might be nervous, for you are, perhaps, wise in feeling this, know that as a Sith, you are not to feel fear. Under the Sith code, there is no such thing as fear, there is only power. You must learn to take that which you fear, and convert it to a source of power and strength.”

He sat down for a moment as he spoke, opening the saber and adjusting something within it.

And then he stood and ignited the saber once again. The length of the blade was a bit shorter now, the perfect length, he thought, for someone of Zatania’s height.

He stared at it for a moment, and then he looked to Judas, his violet eyes revealing nothing.

“There are several methods for dealing with fear…” He stated, a small, perhaps even evil smile touching the corners of his lips.

“And you will have to decide which method works best for you.” He added as he took a step towards Judas. With the use of the force, he gave the chair in which Judas sat a shove, and over the two tumbled, leaving Judas flat on his back, and Sasha standing above him with the ignited lightsaber.

It was a test of sorts, a lesson without warning, teaching Judas to face his fears.

[Judas Escariot]

He fell on his back and peered at the sabre that was now held to his face. He did not understand what was going on at first, but then he had the idea.

He looked at the beam and then looked at Sasha for a moment. Suddenly he grabbed Sasha's ankles and pulled them towards him forcing Sasha to trip backwards. Judas sprung up forward and Sasha landed on his back.

Judas grew a slight smirk at Sasha while he was on his back.

"See, if you did remember me my brother you would have known that I was a very good evader," he said.

He brought out his hand to help Sasha up and waited for his next test.

[SashaKovalev]

A slight expression of approval might have flickered over his features. It was good that Judas had found a physical way to deal with what he had been dealt, but in the future, he would learn that the force was a much better weapon.

And not to gloat about success. Judas’s proud smirk had not gone unnoticed. Sasha ignored the hand that Judas offered and disengaged his lightsaber. He tossed it aside.

His response, what came next, was not a punishment to Judas for momentarily getting the best of his master. It was instead a reminder of who was in charge – and of the fact that Judas had far to go before he would be a match for someone who was well trained in the arts of the dark side. It was a lesson. A valuable lesson to let Judas know that there was more darkness and power out there than he was aware of. And it was Sasha’s job, as his mentor, to teach him these things – to make him aware of them so that he would not be blindsided by them when someone else used them upon him.

The force lighting, combined with a small shove through the force, was enough to send Judas stumbling back. Sasha did not use it for an extended period of time, in fact, he used it only enough to push Judas away, and to give him a reminder of the pain that the dark side could bring upon those who challenged it.

It was a painful experience, he knew, and for a moment after, his demeanor changed. He allowed his guard down just enough for Judas to get the feeling, for Judas to know that he had not acted out of spite. That he had acted to teach a lesson.

[Judas Escariot]

A shock of pain went through Judas' body. He flew back and grew a bit numb.

"Ah, why did you do that?!," he said in pain and out of breath,"How did you do that?"

He sat up and looked at Sasha as he stood up again. Judas got on one foot and stood momentarily, when the pain and woozyness passed.

[SashaKovalev]

Ah, why did you do that?!,How did you do that?

Judas asked as he sat up. When he was ready, moved to one foot, and Sasha offered his hand to help him the rest of the way.

He did not answer at first why or how he had done what he had done.

“The pain will pass in time.” He stated instead, “But to help with it I will teach you a basic force power. It allows for you to continue on despite great pain, and will be useful in battle, should you be harmed.”

He allowed for Judas to take a seat.

“I know it is perhaps difficult at the moment, but concentrate on the pain that you feel, and summon the force to wrap itself around that pain. Not as…not as a blanket, but rather use your anger at the pain you feel, and strive to control it. To wrap the force around it and strangle the life from it.”

He smiled faintly.

“It will take time, and it will tire you until you master this skill. But you would be wise to learn this sooner, rather than later.” He warned.

“For training is at times quite….painful.” He added. As he spoke, the saber flew through the air to rest back in his hand, where he clipped it to his belt alongside his own.

“Now…control your pain…” He suggested, leaning back against his desk and crossing his arms over his chest.

[Judas Escariot]

He stood up and inhaled for a moment...then released. He felt himself slowly leaving the pain until he was focused with Sasha once again.

"Why did you harm me," he said,"Was it nessecary?"

He looked at his hands and then Sasha's.

"How did you do that," he inquired," Teach me that, that was pretty useful.

He watched Sasha eager to gain more knowledge. He was a slave to learning.

[SashaKovalev]

Why did you harm me? Was it nessecary?

Sasha looked away for a moment, and then back to Judas.

"It is better you learn from me than from one who would kill you without a second thought." He stated.

"You are relatively protected here at the order, among those who consider you a brother. But out in the galaxy...there are others like us who use the darkness, who have no allegience to the order. Others who would find amusement in your pain. Its best that you know these things and not be surprised by them."

He remembered his encounter with Mu Satach who had taught him this same lesson - only with much more darkness than he had done to Judas.

"I was fortunate to learn this lesson from someone friendly to the order. I found it invaluable." He added, saying nothing more to explain what had been done to him so long ago now.

How did you do that? Judas had inquired as he looked to his own hands.

Teach me that, that was pretty useful

For a moment, Sasha's eyes narrowed.

"It is more than useful. It can be deadly, Judas." He stated, his tone very serious as he spoke.

It lightened somewhat as he continued.

"I will teach you when you are ready to learn. Right now, there are basics that you must first understand."

Sasha glanced at the clock.

"And sleep that you must get..." He added.

"Its getting late. Why dont you get some rest for tonight, and tomorrow we will begin your training."

[Judas Escariot]

Judas looked at Sasha's stern look when he answered him about this force power. Then, he was suggested to rest. He nodded and proceeded threw the door.

"Good night, my brother," he said as he left Sasha's premises.

[SashaKovalev]

Sasha watched Judas as he left and then he moved to shut the door behind him, leaving the knight alone in his quarters to think about tomorrow's lessons for both of his apprentices.