Terrible Joke thread

[Marcus Telcontar]

After having their 11th child, a Tasmanian couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed. So the husband went to his doctor/veterinarian and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem, but that it was expensive. A less costly alternative, said the doctor, was to go home, get a firecracker, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.

The Tasmanian said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest man in the world, but I don't see how putting a firecracker in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me.

"Trust me," said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a firecracker and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count:

"1"
"2"
"3"
"4"
"5"

at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs, and resumed counting on his other hand.

[Zeke]

Sick. That's sick.

[Lady Vader]

>_<!!!

MARCUS! That's SIIIICK! :x

*:headbash Marcus*

Jeebers! :rolleyes :lol

[Admiral Lebron]

Sick!

Crazy Aussies and there jokes. . . :x

[Alpha]

:lol :lol :lol :lol!!!!!!

[Chase Starwalker]

:lol

you never cease to amaze us Mark!

[Lord Gue]

A captured POW goes to the doctor becuase of a leg problem and finds out he has to have it amputated. He begs the doctor to send his leg home to his wife to have it buried in the family plot. A few weeks later he comes in with the same troubles to his other leg and again he begs the doctor to send his leg home to be buried in his family plot. Well, the next week the condition moves to his right arm, and the doctor amputates it, but this time when he begs the doctor flatly refuses...
"Ve think you are trying to escape!"

[Sanis Prent]

A bad joke thread? Without Reaperfett???

BLASPHEMY :lol

[Alpha]

:lol! he'll filter in...:)

[ReaperFett]

I dont tell jokes, I just say "funny" things that are terribly unfunny :)




I'll dig one up

[Obiwan2 Kenobi]

There was once a little old lady who lived on a farm with her husband. One day, her husband passed away and all the land was left to her. The woman couldn't do all the work alone so put an ad out looking for help. Only two men responded. One was drunk, the other gay. She immediately figured that she would be much safer having the gay guy around than the drunk...so she hired him.

They worked together long and hard during the day and were quite successful. One day, the woman told the gay guy she thought he deserved some time off and that he should go into town to enjoy himself. The gay guy agreed so he did so.

Well, time went by and the gay guy never returned as he was supposed to. More time passed by and the gay guy still was nowhere to be found. The woman was getting a little worried. Finally, the gay guy walked into the house very late that night. He tried to sneak in but was surprised to find the woman still awake, sitting in the other room. She told him to "Come here" so he did so.

Walking into the room, he was very nervous. She stood up an said "Look at me" and he did so. The woman looked at him long and hard and said "....take off my blouse." The gay guy slowly did as the woman asked. She looked at him a bit longer and said "....take off my pants." Still very nervous, he did what she asked. "Take off my shoes" she then said...and the gay guy did so. The woman continued to look at him and finally said "Take off my bra." Shaking, he did as she asked, slowly taking off her bra. "Take off my panties" she commanded as he was now trembling in fear. There was a long pause between the two until the woman finally looked at the gay guy and said "Now I don't EVER want to catch you wearing my clothes to town again!"



:p

[Chesta]

Oh lordy!

:rolleyes

Here's mine-

A piece of string walks into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve string here." So the piece of string leaves the bar and ties a knot in himself about three inches from the top and frays himself upto the knot. Now the string goes back into the bar and ask for a drink, and the bartender asks, "Are you that piece of string I just saw leave?" and the string replies, "No, I'm afraid not."


:D

[Jedi Master Leia Solo]

:lol Funny..I've heard Marcus' joke before.

>_< OBI!!! Oh well!:\ Guess my mind was in the gutter there. OOPS!! Luv ya Babe!

o_O @ Chester's

[Daanarri Raurrssaatta]

I've heard Marks joke before...from MARK. :lol

ANd...er...what did the fish say when it swam into a wall?









DAM!

[Chase Starwalker]

:lol

[Dasquian Belargic]

"No, I'm afraid not."

I've heard that one hundreds of times :lol

[Alpha]

:lol!!!!!!!!!

[Chesta]

:p

I was low on stupid jokes at the library that day.

Here's one-

A man walks into a bar......




Ouch.

[Alpha]

THAT is one of the worst...