The acceptance of a friendly offer (Xazor)

[Vanair Sharkan]

Vanair picked up his double bladed light saber and walked to Xazor's room getting directions along the way. He arrived at her doorway and knocked waiting for an answer.

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor had been sitting on her bed, reading about her race...the Garou. She heard a knock on the door and felt for who it was. It was the new Padawan, Vanair. She had offered to help him switch the color of his saber blades. She opened the door with the Force and it reacted with a hissing sound.

"Greetings, Vanair...come in!"

She said with a friendly smile. Walking over to a table, she pulled out her chair and pulled up another one with her mind. Motioning for him to sit, she called a black leather bag to her hand from across the room. Call it laziness...if you will, but she enjoyed using the Force to help her around her room.

"Now...if you'll allow me to...I'd like to see your saber."

She said softly, hoping that he would not object to her giving it an "examination".

[Vanair Sharkan]

He walked in unsure of his acceptance. It was still hard to think that no one was going to judge him. "and yet has she not proved that she has not judged that she is willing to be your friend." he berated himself inwardly. Friend.....it was a term he had not used in his entire life. In the life of a merc you had no friends only enemies. He sat down in the seat offered and heard Xazor ask to look at his saber.

"Of course.." he unclipped the saber from his belt. "Although I should warn you it comes apart into two pieces." He demonstrated unlocking the two hilts and igniting each one seperately."So you see it is not merely dealing with one saber but two." He disengaged the sabers and locked the hilts back together and handed it to her.

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor grinned as she took the duel-phased in her hand. Setting it on the table, she unclipped her own from her belt. She too used a duel-phased with blue beams. It came apart in the center as his did, to form two separate sabers. She handed it to him and smiled.

"Here...check it out. I think you'll find that they are quite similar. It's name is "Love"."

She said, picking his up off the table once again. Eyeing it carefully, she took it apart in the center and set one of the sides down. The Knight called a small tool kit to her hand and opened it, taking out a small auto-disconnector. She clipped it to the side of the hilt and twisted gently, opening it into two parts. Inside laid the tiny connectors and two small crystals...one scarlet red, and the other a pure crystal with no color. She removed them and brought the bag over to sit in front of Vanair. Untying the leather strap around the mouth of the bag, she looked at him and smiled.

"Choose the color you want and one clear crystal."

She instructed and motioned for him to do so.

[Vanair Sharkan]

"unfortunately the color I would choose is not the color I can pick. Anyway is it possible to make the blade white like the light of the stars?" His tone is very serious and there is a look in his eye and yet it is hidden as if behind a veil one moment you can see it and the next it was like it was never there only to reappear again moments later.

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor lofted a brow for a moment and eyed him.

"Sure, you can have a white bladed saber...but tell me, what color did you wish to have that you can't? I have crystals to make any color blade...combinations create other colors..."

She informed him with a gentle smile.

[Vanair Sharkan]

"Black, pure and dark like the very essence of the void. A black so dark it blots out all light thrown at it." He looks her directly in the eye. "The reason for that color is so that when I have finished my training and leave, I will hunt down every Sith and Dark Jedi that I can find and destroy them like they have destroyed so many others. So that I can show them where they are going... to the void. Now the reason for the white blade is for the blade of Vengence, the light of Justice, something that even the great Sith Lords will fear."

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor's hands began to shake. How he sounded too much like her. She shook her head and looked right into his eyes.

"You are a Jedi, act like one! H..hunting down the Sith and Dark Jedi to kill them is not what we do! That is the path of the Darkside and your anger and rage shall bring you to fight at their sides! You must get in control of your emotions!"

She exclaimed with great concern for him, while in the back of her mind, she spoke to herself. What a hypocryte you are...saying one thing after you have done the opposite... She pushed the thoughts away, recognizing that she had forgiven herself of her mistakes and had moved on. Now she had to teach this lesson to him.

[Vanair Sharkan]

"I am acting like a Jedi. I am going to rid the universe of an evil presence and protect it from them. This is one lesson I have learned well. If you leave even one enemy behind that enemy will multiply and come back. Which is why I seek to destroy all of them. Once dead they can be of no harm. And maybe by doing that I can redeem myself in the eyes of all."

[Xazor Elessar]

"By doing so you will be killing yourself! Ridding the galaxy of the Sith solves nothing! Killing is a stain upon your soul and a transgression against the Force! We do not teach that kind of behavior here....that is not the way of the Jedi. Fear, anger, agression...these things lead to the Darkside, a path that you sadly are heading toward...."

She looked down at the saber in her hands and sighed once again. The hate in his heart was such a tough thing...it consumed him...and she knew what it would do to him.

[Vanair Sharkan]

"Have you ever seen inside the mind of one of the dark ones. I have when they tried to convert me. It is not sane. It is sick and twisted. Do you know how they try to convert people. They start with starvation. Slowly starving you. Then comes the beatings and cuttings. Through this they try to anger to make you hate them to give in to those feelings. Then comes the torture of the mind. They use the force to try and twist your mind. To where nothing seems real anymore. Your world becomes of of nothing but pain, and madness. One of pure terror. So yes this is personal to me. For I know first hand what it is that they do." During this his hands had begun to shake with the memories that came flooding into his mind, The fear, the pain, and the madness. For a moment he thought he would be lost amongst the swirl of memories...

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor was upset with what he was telling her. She did not want him to succumb to his anger as she had once done.

"I was one of them! I was a Sith Knight...I killed thousands and their blood is upon my hands. I was twisted and insane and I tortured people until they joined us. If they didn't, I killed them. I know even better than you what they did because I was one of them...

She let her voice trail off as she pounded the lesson into his mind. She knew hatred to the very core of the word.....she knew how anger could destroy someone....it had destroyed her.

[Vanair Sharkan]

He went deathly still, and a look of comprehension appeared on his face.

"So that is where I knew you from. I knew that I had seen you before. It was you on the planet Cysaria that led that rabble to capture me and lock me in chains....."

With this he looks her straight in the eye waiting for her response.

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor nodded slightly, she had known this all along but was afraid to say anything.

"Yes....that was me. I did that to you. Then I went and killed some more who did not give me the chance to take them to the Emperor's Head-Quarters. I did it.....Empress Xazor Leo Kama, Sith Knight.....Sith Warrior and killer of all. That was me.....and I have the mark for your confirmation."

She took off her cloak, revealing her sleeveless robes....and a tattoo on her left bicept. It was the Mark of the Most High....for bringing the most honor to the Empire....for killing the most people she could.....it brought sadness to her to know she was once like this, but this was still part of a lesson....she hoped. She knew that he could become angry with her and condemn her, and she did not blame him.

[Vanair Sharkan]

He looked long and hard at the tatoo for any discrepincies. He knew that tatoo well. Yet he came to the answer that he had known he would. That this was her. He bowed his head, "Well at least you have found you salvation, and if it makes a difference I forgive you. I still have my peace left to find."

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor rubbed her right hand over the tattoo and sighed.

"Thank you.....it is a constant reminder to me; encrypted in my skin and blood...unable to be removed, ever. I have encountered another here, who I killed her brother and nearly killed her. She was not as forgiving and threatened to leave."

She said with regret and sorrow in her voice. It was difficult for her to accept that one could forgive her...yet another could not.

[Vanair Sharkan]

"Not able to remove?" He looked at her quizicly. "That is something I can change at least. That is if you will permit."
He looked at her honestly hoping she would accept his offer.

"Yes I can forgive you for it was not your choice. It is the ones who trained you that I cannot forgive. They had a choice...." His woice takes on a deadly tone. "...and they chose wrong."

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor shook her head and sighed.

"Trust me...it can't be removed. I have had many try it. I even cut myself.....I slashed my saber through it and the skin healed immediatly. I did not even have a scar left over it. I have had them remove the skin and do skin grafts.....but it always seems to grow back somehow. It is encrypted in my DNA....it is permanent....and there is nothing I could do."

She sighed to herself as she thought of his words.

"It was my choice, after I was forced into it. I could have refused training, but I didn't know better. As soon as I started.....I loved it. Taking another's life seemed so second nature to me. I didn't know anything else except to kill, and I was good at it."

She said softly.

[Vanair Sharkan]

"Well it seems that you are right after all. I am sorry that I could not remove it for you and where you are wrong is that if you enjoyed the killing you would not be here today you would still beout killing the innocent, but you are not so do not think that you enjoyed it. That is what it may have seemed like but deep in your soul you did not or you would still be doing it." He stated it like a fact and was suprised by his own eloquence.

[Xazor Elessar]

Xazor nodded slightly.

"It is alright, I never expected it to come off."

She sighed and listen to him speak...though she knew the truth.

"No....I really enjoyed it. I am only here because I found out that I was wrong...I began to yearn for what the Jedi had......peace....love....tranquillity. Things that my soul did not know. Once I realized this, I hated killing, but I still did it. So, you are partially correct about me."

The Garou said with a gentle smile.

[Vanair Sharkan]

"As I said when we first met. Perhaps we will help each other overcome our demons. Well we have gotten far afield from what brought me here. I believe I will choose the color white, for it is the first color we see the light of a new begining."

OOC: Sorry I was out of pocket for a few days, I was visiting my uncle in the VA hospital.

[Xazor Elessar]

ooc: That's fine! Real life comes first. :) I'm sorry to hear he's in the hospital...I hope all is well. Both of you are in my thoughts and prayers. :)

ic:

Xazor nodded and smiled gently.

"White is a nice color....and true, it is what we see at a new beginning."

With that, she reached into the bag and pulled out a pure crystal, and one with a bit of silver lining around it. With one last look at all of the connectors, she slipped the pure crystal into place first. Right after it in an adjacent way came the other one with the silver lining around it. This would create a white saber with a hint of shininess to it....indeed, it would be a very beautiful blade. Popping the pieces back together as if she had been doing it all of her life, she quickly took the other saber part in her hand and took it apart as she had done with the first. Taking the same crystal combination, she placed them directly in the same manner she had in the first...and then closed it back up. Smiling to herself, she connected the sabers together to create the duel-phase once again.

"There you go....do you wish to keep these? They might make a fine necklace if you put some work into it!"

She wanted to show him what she meant. She had taken enough crystals out of sabers and replaced them to make some nice pieces of jewelry. Opening a small cabinet on the floor, she revealed several beautiful neclaces and ensembles with many different colored crystals in them. One of which appeared to be the most beautiful. It had a red heart in the center with two small white ones on each side.

"I like to make them as gifts for people...or just wear them on special occasions. I never take this one off though."

The Knight said, gently running her fingers over the soft blue stones in the necklace she was wearing. She had not made it....but it was very impressive.

"It was a gift to me from my best friend....who later became my Force brother. Hard to explain, I guess."

Smiling softly, she said this. The necklace had once belonged to someone he cared deeply for...but she had been killed....and so he gave it to Xazor after a long while of mournining the loss of this other woman. It meant so much to Xazor to know how much he loved her. The necklace was a constant reminder of that...