cultural differences explained

[sIlancy]

ok, I thought these would be funny, so i'm gonna share them with ya'll. Don't take offense as their not intended to offend, ok? I just think they'd be a good read.



Aussies, Canadians, American, and Brits

Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies when abroad.
Canadians: Are indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad.
Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.
Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.

Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates.
Brits: Believe you should look out for those who belong to your club.
Americans: Believe people should look out for themselves.
Canadians: Believe that's the governments job.

Americans: Flag-waving, anthem singing, and obsessively patriotic to the point of blindness.
Canadians: Can't agree on the words to the anthem, when they can be bothered to sing it.
Aussies: Extremely patriotic to their beer, would sing the anthem if they knew the words.
Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a brass band to perform their anthem.

Americans: Spend most of their lives glued to the idiot box.
Canadians: Don't, but only because the government won't let them have more American channels.
Brits: Pay a tax to watch 4 lousy channels.
Aussies: Export all their crappy programs which no one there watches, to Britain, where everybody loves them.

Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball, and basketball.
Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer, and rugby.
Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey, and how they beat the Americans twice in baseball.
Aussies: Will jabber on incessantly about how they beat the Poms in every sport they play them in.

Americans: Spell words differently, but still call it English.
Brits: Pronouncs words differently, but still call it English.
Canadians: Spell like Brits, pronounce like Americans.
Aussies: Add "G'day", "mate", and a heavy accent to everything they say in a futile attempt to get laid.

Brits: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an island.
Aussies: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an island.
Anericans: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, and liquor in a backwards country.
Canadians: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, and liquor in a backwards country.

Americans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.
Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer
Brits: Drink wamr, beery-tasting piss.
Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.

Americans: Believe poverty and failure are morally suspect.
Canadians: Believe wealth and success are morally suspect.
Brits: Believe everything is morally suspect.
Aussies: Believe that none of this matters after several beers.


Hope you guys liked it. <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)">

[Jeseth Cloak]

I guess it would be funnier if I had visited all of those countries. <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)"> Still kind of funny anyway though... Oh well. ^_^

[Lady DeVille]

Aussies: Add "G'day", "mate", and a heavy accent to everything they say in a futile attempt to get laid.

<img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/laugh.gif ALT=":lol"> <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/laugh.gif ALT=":lol"> <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/laugh.gif ALT=":lol"> <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/laugh.gif ALT=":lol">

[Vega Van Derveld]

Brits: Pay a tax to watch 4 lousy channels.


I have a couple of hundred channels and I'm in Britain <img src=http://www.thegjo.com/forum/smileys/magtongue.gif ALT=":p">

[Morgan Evanar]

Sattilite TV, eh?

[ReaperFett]

1. It is FIVE channels, and that excludes Sattelite or digital. Jeez, get your facts straght <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)">



Brits: Pronouncs words differently, but still call it English

We also call it 'correct' ;)



Anericans: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, and liquor in a backwards country.
Canadians: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, and liquor in a backwards country.


lol <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)">



Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a brass band to perform their anthem.

You not seen Zulu? <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)">

[Vega Van Derveld]

Brits: Pronouncs words differently, but still call it English

Also technically you Americans are pronouncing it wrong. English was created first in England of all places <img src=http://www.thegjo.com/forum/smileys/magtongue.gif ALT=":p"> We took it over to the US when we made our colonies there.

[Chaos Alexander]

That is funny as hell. I will not lie.

[Jeseth Cloak]

Yeah but English is really just a messy mix of all the Celtic tongues and stuff, and even some french and stuff. <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)"> So mneh. <img src=http://www.thegjo.com/forum/smileys/crazya.gif ALT=":b">

[sIlancy]

I have this other paper that says what guys really mean, it's soooo funny, I'll have to write it down for everybody sometime, lol.

[Seth Darkserpent]

Canadians: Spell like Brits, pronounce like Americans.

That's so true <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)">

[Marcus QDunn]

Aussies: Add "G'day", "mate", and a heavy accent to everything they say in a futile attempt to get laid.


Who said it was futile?


Americans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.
Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer
Brits: Drink wamr, beery-tasting piss.
Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.


Aussies : Wrong. We Export the piss and drink the real stuff left behind. You see, Fosters is PISS. We wouldn't drink that cat pee for anything. Why do you think we export it?

[ReaperFett]

as Monty Python said. What does sex in a boat and Austraiian beer have in common? They're both f****** close to water <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)">


Think it was Austrailian, might be AMerican <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)">

[Gav Mortis]

I think it was the Americans, Fett.

But y'see the beauty of us Brits is, you go from one city to the next and it's completely different. You could never a cockney for a scouser or a brummy for a jordie, even if they all had the same accent! <img src=http://www.ezboard.com/image/emoticons_classic/smile.gif ALT=":)">

[Marcus QDunn]

It was American, cause Python claims our beer and wine could be used for hand to hand combat

[Morgan Evanar]

Americans, as a whole, lack taste in alchohol.

I, however, drink good beer. Nice, dark beer. Dark beer good. Light beer bad. American light beer (aka absolute shzt) worse. Fosters is better than most popular American beer. However, Sam Adams and Michelob Amber Bock are good beers. I have no idea why most Americans drink such dregs when there are so many better beers.

*shrug*

We do make some good wine, I just don't know anything about it. I'd have to ask my Parental Units.

[sIlancy]

lol, yeah, sam adams is one of my favorites, as well as heineken, but I really don't drink beer that often. I don't drink much wine, either, except for plum wine. What I do spend most of my alcohol money on (if not all of it), is sake. That's my absolute favorite. Gekkaiken is the brand I usually go for, as well as Hakusan.

[Lady DeVille]

VODKA!

[Lil Aki]

:: The chibi speaks ::

Wine and Beer taste like cat-pee to me.

(And no, I have never drank cat-pee!)

:: scurries back to TLP ::