::candle light training::

[Azhure Darkstone]

::THe candles were lit, the two chairs were put in place a fair distance apart and Azhure climbed onto the two chairs with her hands and feet, balancing with just her fingers and toes on the chairs, feeling the heat of the candles on her skin that was covered to the minimum that was still modest and allowed enough room not to get too hot, but then again she had never cared too much about being modest.
She closed her eyes and breathed inwards, letting the body relax but also tighten to the point of control at the same time, every muscle, every twitch controlled. Why did she continue this practise for three hours every morning? Habit she guessed.

She felt the heat rising from the candles and felt her fingers slip, but tightened the muscles in them again to continue holding tight and felt the utter beautiful control of the body. After this she would do three hours of the jedi trance, or try to get into the jedi trance again without anything happening. She did not fully trust herself as yet but knew she had to do it, or she would never get it. She kept her eyes closed and did not notice time go by, and did not notice persperation bead role down her arms and legs as the time went by. Timne was nothing, but her body had been trained to independantly know when three hours was up. Time was also everything. Precision and no mistakes.

The door was half left ajar on purpose, enough to let some air through, but to also block out most of the sound, though she did that anyway. ::

[Azhure Darkstone]

::She kept her eyes closed and did not hear a thing, yet her hearing had suddenly attuned to everything surrounding her and her senses reached out. Only the feeling of heat and deep concentration surrounded her mind as the sub-concionseness too care of everything else. What puzzled her earlier was why it too such difficulty to get in touch with the force when it was much the same thing, accpet you had to let go of physical control to a point to get inot a deep force meditation. It was disturbing and once there, very very inviting to stay. What if she had stayed..?? CONCENTRATE!

She had fallen and burned herself many times with too much thought. Let the thoughts go and concentrate. Two hours went by, her muscles were not too tired because of being forced to do this since she was six but they did feel the struggle as her thoughts kept getting interrupted by the events of the day. She forced herself to block off the thoughts and for an extra hour, making two hours stayed there, motionless, not breaking concentration again until a small sound alerted her to attention and she opened her eyes, noticing the time and the bird that had gotten through her window door and was making a loud sound near her ear before she shooed it away with a hand. Jumping off the chairs carefully, her muscles still alert, she stretched and got a towl to wipe perspiration off her face, not bothering to blow out the cnadles for the moment. 12 PM at night. Still not tired.

More like Azhure avoided sleep, avoided the dreams that haunted her, the voices. You did not dream when you did not sleep and she liked it that way for the moment. Whatever time was not spent sleeping or doing somehtign constructive, she napped lightly, careful not to fall in deep sleep and trained her mind and body, though still wary of not losing all sense of wanting to come back to reality once in a jedi trance.
She perferred her assasin training quirks, but never faded from new things and the force seemed magic to her, inviting and somethign she knew she would always love and trust when it came to the crunch. The light side of the force. Sighing she looked in the mirror to very damp hair and grimaced. She needed a shower before getting into a trance, a trance she might not come out of but there was always risks in life and you learnt better with experience. She took extra clothes and a large towel and opened the glass door to go down to the waterfalls, and to let the stressed bird out.::

[Azhure Darkstone]

::The sky was dark and the the night filled the surrounding area. Darkness did not scare her though, more than half her life had been spent in it. She walked quite comfortably, enjoying th sound of the night life and heard the waterfalls, wet ground touched her feet and she hung her clothes and things on the tree nearby. Twenty minutes later she came back, and got dressed. She looked around, bit did not make her way back to the room. She moved her things to a lower branch of the tree and climbed to oen fo the top branches, crossing her legs and balancing on one. Better place than any to start jedi trance. She felt more comfortable when no one was around to get into a trance. You were more wary yes, but there was also a sense of security and independance, or perhaps the sense of knowing you were alone and you did not rely on anyone in particular at this moment. She closed her eyes and sensed the force, it had become easier as she had kept practising it after her first training session, but it still had it's difficulties. She felt the calming touch of the light side of the force, singing a song to her. Making her feel strong inside, ignoring the want to control the body, not the mind. She had become good at ignorign that, so much she did not notice it anymore, she only used it when needed. Body control was just as important as mind control. But the force sang out softly and she felt the need of why did she need to leave?::

Because I must, because there is thigns I must do, things I must correct. A life I must serve and I will die here for too long

::For now her mind accepted the words, and her spirit stayed there to meditate, to reflect. She never did reflect too long about the past though, the same as nightmares.
You took orders, you killed. it was a job, thats how it was. She never thought on what it really meant until a few years ago and now it hurt. She must forgive herself somehow. For how can others forgive before she herself forgives. The want to stay became strogner again and she had to fight to keep in meditating state until she broke it completely and wiped away sweat that had not been there a moment before. So much for her wash.::

why must it be so hard? What would master Warren say?

[finalkwest]

A knock on the door.

..."anyone home" calls my mind,
i see Azhure in meditation
i feel sore memories pain from an earlier moment in time
a struggle within
a personal trouble
.."mabey we'll talk later"

[Azhure Darkstone]

::Azhure's eyes opened, she felt anothers presence, it felt familiar. She sighed, from the pain in her neck, and cracked it before jumping off the branch and looked around curiously. She was rather glad to have a distraction if it was someone friendly, but if it was not someone friendly.... by instinct she had a small balde in her hand, walking silently, and in the shadows. Her assasin instincts kicked in and her eyes searched every parimeter of the area::

Who are you?

[finalkwest]

kwest fazes into view across a clearing in the wood and bows
"I am known else ware as shadow..
Here i go by kwest, for now."
...sense of feeling down but no more ...
"have thoughts like you Azhure, ill not hurt, only heal."
in past,...now focusing on the greater wellfare of a galactic union ... one that i can be real to myself

[Azhure Darkstone]

:;Azhure eyed him carefully, he was the one she had spoken to earlier and she carefully forced herself to put down the blade, her heart was barely beating, as it did when she slowed down to be a predator and she allowed it to rise to normal capacity. Shadow hmm? He'd been pretty noisy, even with the footsteps. Annoyance at herself flickered, not everyone is an assasin here and they're damn as well healthier in the mind than you are.
She stepped in view, covered by shadows and looked at him, no emotion on her face as she leant against the tree. Her emotional defense was up as her manner became less mannered. Her face became one of dark laughter, then softened a bit as she caught her emotion just in time. being defensive did not help anyone right now::

To heal hmm? and what can you do? You cannot erase the past or make things any better.
But come, have a drink with me, If you dont mind water that has gone a bit warm by staying in the bottle for a couple of hours.

::She looked at him again, this time a friendly look in her eyes surfaced, as she put her other emotions on the shelf::

May I ask why you are not asleep at this point in the night?

[finalkwest]

reason im up is that im in pacific time wave (730 pm)

:;"love to share water with you." kwest says to Azhure. "Forgive me if i intrude. Imm wondering how to maximize my force skills. sometimes i can connect to that next level in my training, sometimes i can attain a state of trance that will let me astral travel"::

[Azhure Darkstone]

::Azhure nodded and escorted him to the area where her towel and water was. As well as her sword and throwing knive for practise. She had achieved in her trance the place where those who die go, she did not know fi that was a place strong went while in trnace, or weak and stupid people. Either way it had not been pleasant. Perhaps one day they could exchange secrets. For now she needed a drink, sudden thirst had came over her which was not surprising. She had lost a lot of water through sweat. She dived into the water nearby first then came back out, and wiped her face with the towel. There was only one cup as she had not vouched on company and filling it, she offered it to kwest. Guests first::

If I may ask, what brought you all the way down here? Not many know of this place. Not that I'm complaining, I like company and you bring a welcome glow

[finalkwest]

Im learning,[\i]
wisdom colecting daily
thanks for the water feels good

:handing back the cup
Kwest asks Azhure "how long have you been aware of the force.
force healing and history of the jedi is my st

[Azhure Darkstone]

::Azhure considered the question. Conciously been aware of it? Quite a while but she had forgotten. At the age of four a jedi wanted to take her, but the woman who took care of them had denied the jedi. The jedi had wanted both her and her brother. years later it was forgotten until four years ago. Unconciously, she had used it all her life, in the littlest of uses such as beign aware of things before they happened.
But how to explain it in simple words?::

Quite a while, perhaps a few years.
I am more a warrior than a scholar, though I am interested in the history in not just the jedi, but also of the sith. How long have you been aware of the force?

::She took a drink from the water dropped into her left hand and sipped it, taste did not matter to her much, she didnt really have the gift of taste::

[benskywalker]

ooc~ catastrophic disaster name change soory
old: kwest
new: benskywalker

ic~::I've been aware of the Force since youth also, lately iv come to work with it in daily life. I believe that the studie of meditation and an active particip..p..p..p..atingcan lead to an opening of precognitions in your life in which time apears to slow down. Meditation especialy battle meditation can be an essential part of a jedi's training to reach out with the force. Remember there is a balance in all things. we all come back ::

[Azhure Darkstone]

::azhure smiled::

What goes up must come down. One of the first laws of physics I believe, though I am not a scholar of any sort.
We all come back, or we join the force. And as each life joins the force dark or light the force becomes stronger and the soul is at home.

::She had some more water, and sat back against a tree, feeling slightly more relaxed. Meditation was good but she had a slight problem with it. One that would not go away so easily. She then thought to asl::

How do you meditatate without reminiscing the past? just out of curiosity.

[benskywalker]

::wow im not sure
mabey you should re-visit the past in meditation, by dealing with your issues in the past, you can open your self up to an increased happyness, but thats just my thoughts:

[Azhure Darkstone]

::Azhure looked at him, feeling a challenge, why not? She felt like she didnt care much for anything tonight::

There was once a assasin nearly every planets looking for, the angel fo death. I'm sure you've heard of the person. Used to be on the news a lot. Is it a male or female? How many had they killed? over one hundred in a single killing? How come the person was so difficult to find?


::She laughed, she never used to able t0o utter it, but Xazor had helped. Voices never left you::

It's not easy to reminisc, It's not so simple to face but even when your half there then you stop, you dont want to know anymore.

When you open yourself up, your not always happy.

::She looked past at the rolling hills in the distance, the waterfalls, water drops that fell into water and became nothing. The jungle's trees and flora. No fauna was to eb seen, only sounds. Tonight it as pretty quiet. Azhure turned back to ben and grinned almost ruthlessly before getting up and diving into the water again::

[benskywalker]

::ben sits back and smiles:)

[Azhure Darkstone]

::Her head resurfaced after a few minutes, a challenge it was to see how long youlasted without breath. In the water no one heard you scream nor did you hear anyone else. it was peaceful.
Something she had learnt to master a long time ago was to stay a long time in the blue peace. She looked at Ben, noticing the smile and looking enquiringly, what was he smiling about::

What?

[benskywalker]

;) i feel that your reaction to the water is a source of happiness for you, the peace, the relaxation, the freedom. do you see how to heal yourself, posituve vibrations water sign?

Just smiling to see that you enjoy such simple pleasures

ooc~have you seen AOTC yet?

[Azhure Darkstone]

OOC: YEAH baby! The only thing to say about Yoda is WHAT a puppet! Better characterisation, better acting, better storyline than Ep1. Still hasnt beaten The Empire strikes back but it certainly does kick ass. :) How about you?

IC:
::Azhure just looked at him, no emotion was on her face and she nodded. She looked at the water again and remembered the first time the trainers ahd forced them to stay under water. Half had drowned but she had survived, it did not tell her orders, it did not judge, expect anything. It was ruthless as well as peaceful. Unlike a lot of things it was unchanged and real. She turned again to ben and laughed softly::

The water is many things.
And sometimes the simple pleasures are all you have left and are the ones that last the longest.

[benskywalker]

ooc~goin to rehab:(

ic~ben suddenly looks up,a look of distress goes across his face, " Azure im sorry but ill be offline for a while another mission calls"


ooc~ just keep me in your ?prayers?:x

[Azhure Darkstone]

OOC:I will.

IC:Azhure looked at him considering, then nodded. AS he left she searched the area using vision and hearing for anything then was satisfied, there were no dangers or surprises around. AS she was in the water she dived back in, feeling the silence. Sometimes she couldnt stand silence, other times needed complete silence. Sometimes you just needed to be away from people to look back into the big picture and not get caught up in small trivials of life. Ben had been interesting, someone who would be good to get to know. The onyl thing that caught her off gaurd was that he observed just as well as she did, she did not like people guessing her moves but life changes.
Softly she went out of the water, standing in the cool night breeze. What time was it? Her body time clock told her around four thirty AM. Time to get back, have a dose of sleep. If you were too tired, you did not dream, at least she didnt.
Taking her things she went back silently into the room, changed and closed her eyes::