Here's a joke you might like.

[Garrett Blade]

It's one of Ken Dodd's...

A producer had a marvellous idea to have a play written for him called "Page 3 Girls". It was an excuse really to get young ladies to take their clothes off. The opening night came. Page 3 Girls - the place was packed! :p The lights came down on the auditorium and there was a complete blackout. Then from the back, a, I think it's called, a pin focus line whent shft! and hit the front of the stage. The curtains parted, and out stepped this beautiful girl - not a stitch on. A perfect, beautiful body, as naked as the day she was born. And she stepped up to the mic, and said...

"Ladies and gentlemen...may I have your attention."

[Morgan Evanar]

I don't get it.

[Slayn Cloak]

I got it, but it's kind of stupid...

[Azure Regalia]

Hehehehe... page 3. Heheheheheheheheheheheheheeeeee!!!

:p

[Loki Ahmrah]

I didn't think that was very good, there are so many amazing ones and you chose that? Besides, his jokes aren't really the type you cane type. You have to watch HIM deliver the jokes. :)

[ReaperFett]

It's like writing Eddie Izzard. 50% of the joke, GONE! :)

[Streetpizza]

Here's a wonderful American style coleslaw recipe from Emo Philips.



Chop cabbage into large bowl.
Look for green peppers.
Drive to store.
Choose green peppers.
Carry them to a cashier.
Drive home.
Find money.
Drive to store.
Buy green peppers.
Drive home.
Chop green peppers into bowl.
Look for mayonnaise.
Drive to stupid store.
Buy mayonnaise.
Drive home.
Mix mayonnaise into bowl.
Look for lousy raisins.
Drive to store.
Ignore cashier’s ignorant snickering.
Buy stupid lousy raisins.
Drive home.
Mix raisins into bowl.
Look for stupid lousy miserable damned stinking carrots.
Drive to blasted stupid lousy store.
Buy lousy miserable damned stinking stupid carrots.
Yell at stupid ignorant Nazi redneck store personnel for laughing at you.
Crawl to car.
Drive home.
Chop stupid lousy miserable damned stinking lousy stupid lousy miserable stupid stinking lousy carrots into bowl.
Look for finger.
Look harder for finger.
Look everywhere for finger.
See cat scurrying away.
Chase cat out door.
Follow cat into new neighbor’s house, surprising him in the middle of a crack deal.
Dive over sofa to escape automatic weapon fire, landing on cat’s tail, causing cat to jump up screeching and claw new neighbor’s eyes as he’s bending over the sofa to shoot you, enabling you to grab automatic weapon from his hand and hold it on him and other crack dealer until police arrive, arrest them, and drive you and cat to hospital, where cat’s stomach is pumped, finger is found and it’s sewn on good as new.
Collect reward of half of neighbor’s property from police drug dealer auction, then just buy all the ready-made coleslaw you want from a nice deli.

SERVES UP TO 50,000

[Admiral Lebron]

I want to make coleslaw like that. :)