Talk Show idea again..

[Moltar]

Ok kids, it's that time of month again. I'm thinking on Feb 23, a Sat evening starting a Talk Show/Jerry Springer type thread, anyone intrested. Socl Puppets may apply. And seeing that I'm board as crazy, and stressed like a Bull about to be branded I was wondering if everyone would like to participate?

[Marcus Telcontar]

LIVE FROM SWFORUMS



We are reporting to you today about the sudden outbreak of.... comedy. Tragic, inexplicably funny comedy.

Look! There! There is a victim..... excuse me.... excuse me!!!! Hi, I'm from the Muppet News Romm and I understand you were attacked by comedy... is this right?!?!

[HaeLari Draevyn]

Oh oh oh! I'm interested!!!:D

[Han Skywalker]

*wants in if he can sit next to haeLari*

[HaeLari Draevyn]

:p Hmmm..... I don't know.....

[Q]

If anyone has ever overheard any of the interesting conversations I've held with a one Mr. Spock, you'd know that I would be interested. Assuming, of course, that it can hold my interest. It's a slippery little devil.

[Charley]

Hmm....fascinating.

slurp-slurp

[Q]

I got his autograph! :D

[Charley]

Was the photo sticky?

[Moltar]

Very well then, on Saturday night we will have a show that will be named in the pages of history! Or maybe just in my mind.

[HaeLari Draevyn]

Originally posted by Lounge Lizard
Was the photo sticky?

O_o Yikes, am I the only one that thought that was wrong?

[Khan Surak]

Indeed.

Vulcans are very squishy.. sticky.... things.

[Admiral Lebron]

Can I be the guest?

[Q]

Originally posted by HaeLari Draevyn
O_o Yikes, am I the only one that thought that was wrong? You... have no idea. :D

[Moltar]

Yes you can be the guest, so can Q! So can anyone!

[HaeLari Draevyn]

I'd be a guest, but there's nothing weird about me.:rolleyes *sarcasm obviously* lol

[The Thread Hi-jacker]

NO BODY MOVE!! I'M TAKING OVER THIS THREAD, YOU REBEL SCUM!!

[Moltar]

Hay, I paid the rent, get out!

Security!

*Two large security guards appear and push the highjacker out of the thread.*

[Luke's Amputated Hand]

(Scuttles into the legally rented space and starts pulling on Moltar's pant cuff. When Moltar looks down, the hand points to itself indicating it would like to be on the show.)

[Old Man Jedi]

By the......!!


Your not related to Thing, are you?

[Taylor Millard]

Thing...isn't he made of Rock? Have blue eyes and hang around Yancy Street?

*Hears whispering as Tomar runs up to him. Listens...

Oh THAT Thing...Sure looks like it.

[Luke's Amputated Hand]

(Starts to tap with one of it's fingers, but the attempt fails. Scurrying up a table, the hand grabs a pencil and begins to write:
I am not related to Thing. I only look like Thing thanks for dear ol dad. he's the one that lefy me in this sorry state. I tell ya, I get no respect! Being uncerimoniously chopped off my wrist! I miss that wrist. And then plummeting down that horrid shaft! It HURT when I hit! And then pummeling even FURTHER into the atmosphere of Bespin! No respect what so ever.
Having finished, the hand placed the pencil done and began to impatiently tap his index finger as various people read the note.)

[Darth Turbogeek]

WTF?!?!?

Can I ask you o Amputated Hand... how do you eat?

[Luke's Amputated Hand]

(If the hand could frown, it would be doing so right now. But it can't. All it can really do when it's angry or annoyed is flick people off. But, it's neither at the moment, so it just picks up the pencil and scribbles a short and simple reply:
I don't eat.
What more need it say?)

[Darth Turbogeek]

For our listeners at home, what do you do all day?

[HaeLari Draevyn]

*blinks at the hand*

Well, there's a definate guest for the show. :p

[Moltar]

Originally posted by Luke's Amputated Hand
(Scuttles into the legally rented space and starts pulling on Moltar's pant cuff. When Moltar looks down, the hand points to itself indicating it would like to be on the show.)

Anyone can be on the Show!
:|

Well, I guess I need to set a few rules.


If it's a sock puppet, please try to make it either Science Fiction or Fantisy related
Please act in accordance with all rules that have been established by SWFans, that includes no God Modding, no maiming, no killing, no showboating, no eating other characters unless their your food, no Imperials drunk after 7 PM, no Jedi having kids with a Wookie, no Sith streaking across the thread, no mojo stealing
4 No New Republic members in the pool after 5 PM unless accompied by either a female or a penguin.
No "Hi I'm Darth Vader, I'm squeezing the frell out of you because you won't give me free cable"
No horseplay unless your a horse, and if you are one you will be sent to the vet for the operation if you do.
No loitering around the set, Death Star, or other huge weapon of doom unless you intend to fire it, destroy it, or redecorate it.
No passing in the right hand lane unless your Gandolf then "NONE SHALL PASS"
The food concourse will be Behind the tenis court, the court will be inside city hall, and if you don't have your hall pass your not getting in.
Please use some common sense when bringing children (specificaly twins) into these "I'm evil now, so go hide and split my children up so I can come after them later" type deals.
No one writes Corran Horn's character except one writer.
No says the Balloon Doggies!
No one else can win the race except for Han Solo, unless it is on Tantooine
Then the winner will be determaned by who doesn't crash.
The French will not be allowed to taunt anyone because of the janitorial bills from last time in 1978
Anyone with writers cramp is obliged eat Spam, not post it.
Anyone named Q has all the power over all things, except for SWFans.net, VBullitin, myself, and this 6 pack of Snapple.
The Borg are not invited to attend unless they can prove that they can sit still and not try to assimulate the set.
There will be no talking about Voyager unless your talking about 7 of 9 and I want pictures!
All Transformers will be in Robot mode, because of regulations.
And if they are in an Animal alt-mode they must stay outside.
If anyone brings minstrials they will be eaten.
All lightsabers will be either on or off. Otherwise they might explode.
All teachers will be giving out homework and there will be a quiz
Long list ain't it
There will be no drinking out of the fountain. Thats not Mountain Dew. And this is not Dewtropolis
Please keep all arms, legs, feet, hands, head, stomach, tenticals, weird thingys inside the ride or you lose them.
All flames directed toward me will be answered, but not here.
Please keep all nessary paperwork untill you are told to turn them over to Anderson Accounting for Shreading
Please leave all flammable things at home except for beer, lighters and a fork.
Cizerack can attend, unless the burning overtakes them then they must leave, and they can return when it is finished.
All Sith will be searched, then searched, then searched again to make sure that they will not bring in any weapons.
If you lose a quarter and find a dollar, keep it you just made $0.75
Unless it was my dollar, then I want it back.
No one will sit between Rama and Nuri Punishment: Death by being torn apart.
No one will sit between Darth Vader and Lady Vader. Punishment: Death (Their choice)
No one will sit between DT's wife and DT. Punishment: Panning
No one may sit between a Cizerack and his or her mate otherwise that intruder will be on the menu.
No one will talk about wrestling unless your going to do it, or your a mark who won't shut up about it.
There will be a petting zoo provided by the "Improve TGE's Fleet Fund"
There will be a Car Wash to wash cars
This list is compiled at 4:00 AM by a college student who is stressed out and can't sleep
Read War and Peace, unless you pass Go
Dinner will be provided by either the Master Jedi Chief or the New Republic, or from AL.............WHAT?
Come 2 hours earlier then you did yesterday.
The little kids room is being remodled, but who cares Kids like power tools.
The Jedi can have the brisket, or the turkey but we do not have any Root Stew
The New Republic will be declared legaly dead untill they rise again and disappear again
Tractor beam on full
The main event will be decided later ON PPV!
Is the buffer full yet?
AT&T will be running the phone service at the show, but bring your Visa card
Calling Yavin 4 will cost $1000000.00
There will be No Monkeys.
No one may run around unless they are hyper.
No one may smoke in front of the building.
The Smoking area is located by The Order of The Fist's box.
The pie is for eating, remember that okay.
Chris Rock will be in the Champain room.
Coffie will be put into an IV for everyone if they fall asleep.
I don't want to go to sleep yet.
No one may park an X-wing in a Tie Fighter space, unless your defecting to the New Republic.
No one may sell Chester, Frito-Lay does that already.
Anyone found singing AYBABTU will be ejected into space.
Anyone found eating The Rock's cake will be given
Anyone not finishing a sentence will be sent back to 7th grade English Class.
Anyone eating The Rock's cake will be given "The People's Elbow"
If you've been in a crash, and have been rebuilt and your name is Lee, then NASA just called YOU HAVE BEEN RECALLED.
Manimal will not be shown tonight.
Anyone found loitering outside of the door will be put to work.
If you have been cleansed, and are from the Cluster you are not required to attend.
If your on a living ship, lost in some part of the universe surrounded by Muppets, give yourself 10 points.
It is now 4:20 AM.
Can we have your Liver?
If the Adminstrator walks by, turn on the Machine that goes Ping.
Warning, Trip Hazzard.
Attention Car 54 Where are you?
If you are using Trillan, you might soon find your computer taken over by AOL.
There will be no weapons in the compound unless Darth Lynch says so.
I have never eaten SPAM, or Spam the lunchmeat.
All Smilies will report to Dr. Smith for their Check Up, except for this guy :rolleyes, your fired.
I SUMMON THE CAN OF WTF!
If we find David Letterman's hair, don't feed it it will reproduce.
And if it does reproduce some Klingons will be mad.
All weapons will be handed to Darth Lynch for "Safe Keeping"
Forks are not considered weapons. And I don't know what a Fork is (long story)
And finally, Brother Mayird says were out of Holy Handgrenades, but we got cookies.



This list was brought to you by Snapple, we have the money to do this in a galaxy far away.

And do you think I'm serious, gosh I hope not. Otherwise it's back to English class for me!

[Can of WTF]

I SUMMON THE CAN OF WTF!

j00 c4773d d00d?

ph34r m3, 4 ][ 4/V\ j00 c4|\|! j00 c4|\| 0f \^/7F!!!


(One of these day, I'm going to set up my signature.... but until then..)

j00 pwnd d00d!!

[TheHolo.Net]

Wields the almighty axe that can get this show cancelled if it’s a flop.

Sweeps can be a real pain, you had best live up or snikt. >D :p

Oh and BTW, I am only kidding, hence the :p in there. :D

[Marcus Telcontar]

Too much very :lol :lol stuff to quote from Moltar



And that's the reason I love this place. You never know what you going to see next.

[vBulletin]

Fortifies its database to withstand the massive influx of posters and viewers an event like this may bring.

We are all now protected by MySQL Dump, carry on and have fun.

(And no dump isn’t not what some of you may be thinking, it’s a real term that means all is good and backups aplenty)

[HaeLari Draevyn]

:lol Nice! And I'm having one of those nights I don't want to go to bed either, and that list has kept me busy for about a half hour rofl

But what about sporks? Are the weapons?

*hides her collection of sporks.*

[Marcus Telcontar]

/geek mode on


We are all now protected by MySQL Dump


But technically, a dump file is an error log or memory hex map produced after a program crashes out on an error state. I hope we have something else, like Beowulf cluster of SWFans.net admins!!!

/geek mode off


:p

[TheHolo.Net]

Originally posted by Marcus Q'Dunn
/geek mode on




But technically, a dump file is an error log or memory hex map produced after a program crashes out on an error state. I hope we have something else, like Beowulf cluster of SWFans.net admins!!!

/geek mode off


:p Technically in some forms of software yes, but not our beloved MySQL. A SQL Dump file in MySQL is the entire contents of our complete Database, which is every bit of text in threads, user information and I could go on and on and on. MySQL doesn't always make a great deal of sense, but it works pretty well and we have a perfect record when it comes to account deletions.....Someone asks me to delete thier account and I do. :)

[Marcus Telcontar]

And unlike EZBoard, if they dont ask, you dont delete.


Ahhh, so in reality, the MYSQL DUMP is in fact more like a Backup action and not an error handler.


And to all prospective geeks out there - be thankful you will never see a mainframe Dumpfile. The worst thing you can see when you get inside a real computer room is a blinking VT100 terminal with the big flashing green text DUMP FILE COMPLETE.

Actually, no, there's worse. It's smoke from a CPU overheat after the air conditioners fail. Then you know your going to have a bad day.

[Moltar]

No, it's only after a water main explodes and ruins your computer that you know your having a bad day!

[Luke's Amputated Hand]

(The hand picks up the pencil yet again and scribbles:
I act like a hand. I shuffle, scuffle, and I'm quite good at getting into those tight spots to gather lost items.
It stops to crack it's knuckles, and as it does so, it reads the incredibly looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong list of rules. A bit bewildered, it picks up the pencil again, notices it needs sharpening, sticks it in a sharpener, and once it's sharpened, begins to write again:
I, uh, do I fall under any of that? Or am I legal?
If it could and had a head, it would be scratching it right about now.)

[Strider]

Let me put it in a way that everyone can understand...

This user Strider can be on the show.

The rules are flexable....

[Marcus Telcontar]

Errr.... wasnt this thread supposed to be the talk show?

[Sith Ahnk]

O, Moltar, what a killjoy.
*puts pants on*

[Marcus Telcontar]

Oh geez..... I really didnt need that mental image :x

[Sith Ahnk]

Just goes to show I go above and beyond the call of duty

And when you say that did you mean you don't want your mental image of me in pants?

[Strider]

No the talk show will be on Saturday, this is just a thread of insanity!