Happy New Year

[Doc Milo]

I'd like to make an announcement to you all. I consider you all a community of friends -- even though we, for the most part, only know each other from our online conversations.

Anyway, I'd like for you all to share in my joy this New Year.

At the stroke of midnight, when 2001 melted into 2002, I proposed to my girl, and she accepted. I am officially engaged to be married, and see myself having a very busy, yet joyous year in 2002.

Happy New Years, everyone, and I hope you all had great times with whomever you spent the day with this year.

[Marcus Telcontar]

Oh wow!

Congratulations!!

[Jedi Master Carr]

Congrats Doc, you picked the perfect moment to propose and most romantic.

[BUFFJEDI]

congrads DOC!!!! hope you guys have a LONG ,happy life together.you ole smoothy.

[darth_mcbain]

Congratulations Doc - that is awesome! You know, my brother did the same thing (proposed on New Year's) - it is a great way to share New Year's with that special someone... Best of Luck to you...

[Jedieb]

Congratulations Doc! I wish you and your fiancee the best. Remember, the ring should be 2 times your monthly salary. Don't let her talk you into 5 times!

:clap

[BUFFJEDI]

heyDOC!!, I heard Cracker Jack makes one hekofa ring;)

[darth_mcbain]

LOL :lol --- Or you could keep pumping quarters into one of those supermarket toy dispensers - a ring is bound to pop out before too long :)

[CMJ]

I'm a bit late...but congrats Doc! Couldn't happen to a better guy. ;)

[Doc Milo]

Thanks all -- and I had the ring at the proposal, Buff, but where were you when I needed the advice! Could have saved me some money.

Jedieb: My mother didn't raise a sucker! :)

Two times monthly salary? Is that gross or net? Because depending on that, I got it for 1.2 to 2 times the salary...

[BUFFJEDI]

:) :) :)

wow doc you spent a few coins on that ring.!!!!

I always tell people no matter how much money I have (or don't have now) I'll only spend 2,000 on a ring.I guess I'm cheap like that :D . Did she have any idea it was coming? or was it a total shock to her?

[JMK]

Sorry, a little late, but congrats Doc! All the best to you and yours in 2002!

[Doc Milo]

Buff: Didn't spend much more than that. I don't have a large monthly salary! I did get it wholesale, so it appraised for more than double what I paid for it!

She knew I was going to propose -- at some point -- but it shocked her at when I proposed... :)

[Jedieb]

As an old married man I feel obligated to share what little wisdom I've accumulated these last 7 years. Whether your fiancee wants a large or small ceremony, she's going attack the planning of the event the way Rommel prepared for war in the desert. Here are some quick rules that will get you through the next few months.

1) Just nod your head and say yes.
This really is the most important rule a man must follow before a wedding. Some say if it's followed after the marriage that marriage is guaranteed to succeed. You are about to be inundated with the most brain jarringly mind numbing questions a man can face. Menus, flower selections, seating arrangements, music, bridesmaid dresses, tuxedoes, vests, bow tie patterns, bow tie color schemes, bow tie sizes, churches, ministers, vows, invitations, envelope colors, envelope designs, envelope sizes, addresses, reception halls, open bar, live music, DJ, wedding videos, wedding photographers, shoe dye, wedding cake, wedding cake flavors, wedding cake layers, wedding cake ornaments, ceremonial wedding cake knife, and I could go on but I'm afraid my computer may shut down on me.

I actually pity you Doc, you poor unwitting fool. You have no idea what's in store for you. It's not really your fault. As a man, you simply are not equipped with the wedding planning gene. There are some men who have this gene, but they're named Franc or Bruce and they make a nice living as Fashion Designers or Figure Skaters. The irony is they never get to plan a traditional wedding. But don't pity them too much, they do get to put on some nice parades in San Francisco every other month.

Doc, becuase you lack the WP gene you have no idea what your fiancee will be saying when she begins asking you for input on the ceremony. You'd have better luck understanding Jackie Chan as MacBeth. Her lips will move. Sounds will come out. Unfortunately they'll come across as incoherent babbling. That's where rule #1 comes in. Hopefully, you'll be able to make out a word or two and realize that you're being asked a question about the wedding. Simply nod your head and say "Yes (fill in your nickname for her.)" But you can't wear it into the ground or she'll catch on to the fact your completely out of the loop. So here are some other responses that you need to rotate in and out;
"Sounds great honey!"
"You'd look great in that color!"
"I like that one!"
"That one looks nice!"
"That shade of pink looks much softer than the other 5,000 we've looked at this afternoon!"

Actually, stay away from that last one. I actually uttered that one in an attempt to reestablish my manhood and I was denied sex for two weeks. Anyway, you get the idea. Now, it's time for rule#2:

2) Go back and read rule #1.
And rule #3:

3) Stupid, go back and memorize rule #1. You're wasting time even reading this.

Well, I hope this helps Doc. Let's us know when she sets the date and we'll all chip in and get you an appropriate gift. You know something usefull like a fake ID, passport, a ticket to Mexico, whatever JMK can put together with photoshop will be at your disposal. Congratulations my friend and MTFBWY!:rollin

[Champion of the Force]

Sorry for being a bit late on the reply, but congrats Doc. :)

[Doc Milo]

Actually, Jedieb, I've been holding my own so far -- how long can I expect that to last?

And is it proper for me to ask, "Which is cheaper?" before saying "Yes, dear" and nodding my head?

[CMJ]

LMAO Jedieb..that was one of the 3 funniest posts I've ever read I think! I laughed for 5 good minutes about it. :)

[Rama]

Staples in the neck




and Congrats Doc.

[Marcus Telcontar]

When we went shopping for engagement rings, the one she liked cost 180 dollars. Mine cost 200. Yes, I wore an engagement ring.

Wedding rings were 100 dollars. It's not the dollars, it's the thought.

Now Jedieb, you forgot the Relatives rule - the more relatives involved in the planning, the more expensive and confusing it gets. The second secret is to get someone else to pay for it. At that point, nodding your head and using rule 1) makes for a good start in married life.

My advice - elope. Say your doing it for love. Chicks love that sort of thing and you can get away with just about anything by saying "But honey, I love you!", said with puppy dog eyes. If that doesnt work, you need flowers.

If that doesnt work, Chocolate.


Seriously, remember one thing - make sure you NEVER have a bucks party closre to the wedding and never go to strippers. Also, get to sleep early and dont drink much. Go out to have fun no matter what happens, get out of the reception early.... and then you will enjoy the night after that far more.

[darth_mcbain]

HaHaHa :lol :lol :lol That was hilarious EB. Having just gone through this myself (not just, but close enough), I know what you mean.

Doc, just read EB's post, keep your head high, and you'll pull through this one just fine...

[Jedieb]

And is it proper for me to ask, "Which is cheaper?" before saying "Yes, dear" and nodding my head?

"Hear you nothing that I say?" Of course that's not a proper question Doc. Actually, it's a SENSIBLE male brained question. Which is why you should NEVER ask it! Female minds in the throves of wedding planning euphoria care not about logic or reason. They care about flower arrangements and balloons.


Seriously, remember one thing - make sure you NEVER have a bucks party closre to the wedding and never go to strippers. Also, get to sleep early and dont drink much. Go out to have fun no matter what happens, get out of the reception early.... and then you will enjoy the night after that far more.

I must disagree with my fellow man in marital bondage. Have your bachelor party as close to the ceremony as possible. The memories of that night will be the only thing that will get you through the ceremony and reception. As for strippers, the more the better. Those will be the last loose women that will dance naked for you and only y
ou and you should treasure the moment. Take plenty of pictures so you can share the night with your children one day. At the very least you could post them here for the rest of us.

Time for a true story.
Obviously I'm having a lot of fun here. Let me take a break and give you one quick story about my wedding day so you can see that even in the silliest of my posts there lurks sad and frightening truths. We had an outdoor wedding at a lovely facility right by a river. It was gorgeous. But not as gorgeous as I thought my wife looked as she walked down the aisle towards me. I could tell she was nervous by the way she held her hands. I stared at my wife and tried to memorize every detail of her face, her expression, the way she walked, everything. A few years later I told my wife about that. When I asked her what she thought as she first looked at me that day she told me these were her first thoughts;
"I can't believe the son of a bitch forgot to shave."

RUN MY SINGLE BROTHERS! YOU'RE STILL FREE! DON'T GIVE IN TO THE DARK SIDE! RUUUUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!!!!:crack

[Jedi Master Carr]

LOL Jedieb that was great. I must say I am still single, but I am sure once I find that special someone I will probably have to take that long walk. Thanks to you I at least know what to look foward to.;)

[BUFFJEDI]

Thats some good stuff there EB(s) :lol :lol :lol

When I get a chance I'll give ole Doc my 3 cents worth( FINALLY there's a topic in here I'll rule WOMEN!!!!!!!!)

[JMK]

Have a glass of JD before the ceremony. It'll give you the cajones you need to get through the rest of the day. Plus it should be like "the hair of the dog" and used to get rid of the hangover...how? By getting polluted again of course!

[Doc Milo]

Don't worry Buff, I know who to come to for advice before the Honeymoon :)

[Jedieb]

Have a glass of JD before the ceremony. It'll give you the cajones you need to get through the rest of the day. Plus it should be like "the hair of the dog" and used to get rid of the hangover...how? By getting polluted again of course!

:lol JMK! I loosened up before my ceremony by chewing out my brother-in-law and kicking him out of the room after one of his little "jokes." It's one of the best memories I have from my wedding day.


( FINALLY there's a topic in here I'll rule WOMEN!!!!!!!!)

Buff's Guide to Turning Women Into Chained-Leia-Metal-Bikini-Wearing Love Slaves will be out in hardcover this spring. Look for it at your local Waldenbooks! :D

[Mu Satach]

Congrats Doc!


Originally posted by Doc Milo
And is it proper for me to ask, "Which is cheaper?" before saying "Yes, dear" and nodding my head?

Absolutely not.

You may just be interested in cost comparison and finding the best deal... but what will come into her brain is, "You care more about money than me."

I know it's illogical... but that's what what will happen.

If I ever figure out how the female mind works I'll write a tech manual for you guys. But I'm still in the early stages of research. ;)

[JMK]

Doc, check out www.bluenile.com
They'll educate you on anything engagement-related that you don't already know, especially about ring buying.

[darth_mcbain]

Yeah, you might also want to swing by www.theknot.com I know I couldn't drag my fiancee (now wife) away from that site for our entire engagement :)

[CMJ]

It's funny..one of my friends back home in Texas just got engaged...he asked me to be his best man in an email I just got. I guess I'm gonna have to fly back for the wedding in June now(if I have a job that'll let me).

[BUFFJEDI]

Doc I'd give you honeymoon tips BUT there are things ONLY a few people in the world are Physically able to do ;)


Eb(s):lol :lol :lol You'll get the first copy big guy.:)


But if I could be serious for a ( moment). :angel Having been around alot of married people and seeing where they screw up , I'd like to give a few little tips to Doc,(not that he needs them) but there maybe those out there that does .

Ist and foremost PUT God first NO MATTER WHAT with him in your relationship it is foulproof.


2

. Marry ONLY out of love or it will fail.You may stay together but you will exits not LIVE.

3. Share your feelings NEVER !!!! lie!!!, NO MATTER WHAT!!! some may say (well what if he got drunk and cheated?? to bad DON"T LIE . Because if you got drunk and cheated in the first place Odds are you relationship ain't right and it needs to be fixed.Even little white lies can hurt a relationship


4.Really 2nd. being the man of the household BE the spiritual leader.





5. WHATs your's is her's whats her's is yours.(except SW's collection ) I see to many married couple that have seperate things (so to speak)ie.. MY car his car . My money her money.etc.. When you inter into marriage you become one. When you start seperating things you become two eh eh don't work that way.you are one.


6.Never be afraid to admit you are wrong.


7.Treat her everyday,as if it were your last together. you never know when it will be,

8.Respect her, her opinions.


9.NEVER tell her you hate her. Never yell /fuss at her in public and round friends and family no matter how upset you are.DON"T be little her.


10.KEEP what happens in your
bedroom to yourself.Never disrespect her bytelling your friends/family sexual things about each other.That does include what happens on the kitchen sink, coffee table, stove, bathtub,shower,desk,wall, flower bed....well you get my meaning:)



But I do know some tricks for the honeymoon:) you know IF you want them.These even the acerage joe can do:smokin

[darth_mcbain]

Good luck on the best man thing CMJ. I did that for my brother this past year and it was a lot of fun, but pretty nerve wracking too. My one bit of advice would be to make sure that you don't wait until the last minute to think of something to say for your speech. Take the time to at least plan it out and have a general idea of what you are going to say, because once you get up there, your mind starts to race and it helps to know where you are going with whatever story you're telling. Other than that, just speak from the heart - be there for whatever the groom needs - and ENJOY THE BACHELOR PARTY!!! :smokin