Species info.

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

I should post info on Mhalbrecht's species before I use the glowing wings or other supernatural powers he has.

He is one of a race of energy beings called the Vok that can take many forms, because they don't consist of matter.
They can be disrupted by high energy things such as blasters and lightsabers, as well as space radiation.

They have often been called angels because they usualy take a robed, humanoid form with energy tendrils that they can use to fly coming out of thier back.

Some interfere in Mortal affairs, while others choose to not get involved.

They came from an alternate universe, called Heaven by Mortals.

Because they exist as energy, once they form, they live for ever as long as they are not disrupted, and the eldest have been around since what mortals think of as the begining of time.

The most powefull of these beings, the supreme leader, created the force.

Some of these beings turned evil, because they wanted to have the Force for themselves.

They created the Dark Side, but were banished to an inescapable realm.

Soon, a few Vok discovered the Dark Side, and created thier own Dark Realm, and dark creatures to help destroy.

But then, sentient beings developed in our world.

These beings could use the force, and became the wild card of the eternal war.

Thus, The Sin War began. good and evil fought to take mortals to thier side.

As the denizens of evil became restless with the War, thier spy, Izual, told them of crystals made of pure Force energy that could be used to trap the Force and harness it. These crystals, called Soulstones, were also able to trap the spiritual essence of Vok.

The Prime Evils made a plan to harness the SOulstones, and staged a false Coup and went to the mortal plain.

The Vok General, Tyreal, showed some warriors how to use the force and soulstones, and they became the Jedi.

The Prime Evils were trapped, and set to work corrupting the Soulstones.

They succeeded, and all got new bodies.

They almost concoured the Mortal Realm, but were stopped by a few heroes and the Last Jedi Master.

They formed a new Jedi, but Tyreal and luckily the Last Evils, and trace Essences of the Prime Evils were trapped in new Soul Stones, accidentaly created by the destruction of the Worldstone.

The world was no longer protected from the Dark Side, but the Leaders of evil were trapped.

They atempt to break out to this day, and can sometimesturn things to the Darkside.

Tyreal used the last of his power to destroy his stone, and sent the other stones to the far corners of the galaxy.

The stone containing Izual, Lord of Treachury, and Azmodan, Lord of Sin, lies on Yavin IV.

The stone containing Diablo, Lord of Terror, and Duriel, Prince of Pain, lies on Dagohbah.

The stone containing Ball, Lord of Destruction, and Belial, Lord of Lies, lies on Kessel.

The stone containing Mephisto, Lord of Hatred, and Andariel, Maiden of Anguish, lies on Tatooine.

Tyreal was throne forward in time as a baby, without memory of being a Vok. Vader found him, and the child pretended to be evil, because he knew, he didn't know why, but he did, that if he was with Vader, there would always be hope of redemtion.

He believed Vaders true principals, that if the Empire wasn't filled with Hate, it would be good, and swore he would create that Empire.

Anyone with questions or comments, please reply.

[Sanis Prent]

So these creatures created the Force, huh? I kinda like the midichlorian idea better.

So you didn't wanna stop with us just saying no to the idea of immortality, but now you want to add other things that destroy the continuity of the SW universe?

No.

[Dark Lord Dyzm]

Hmmmm, for some reason I find some of that hard to belive...
Like All of it.

Your story might work in the Fantasy RPs found around. Or your own Sci-Fi story thing. Its like trying to Mix Star Wars, Star Trek, and Battle Star Galactica into one thing.

[Lilaena De'Ville]

Mephisto

Thats a shoe brand, we sell those at my store! (yes, it is my store. Not only do I work there, I own it! Nah..j/k)

On a serious note, I thought that the above story was very interesting, and thought out, but I don't think it will work in the Star Wars enviroment.

We try to stick as close as we can to the movies and even to the EU...when we do make up our own things, its with the understanding that we can't mess with what we consider "canon." Like midichlorians. Sorry, I don't think that it will work.

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

Change: They Geneticaly Engineered Midichlorians.
Is that better?
And, don't bring up the imortality thing again.
These guys can be killed by energy waepons, or matter explosives, or space radiation.

[Seth Darkserpent]

Well, you're dictating the Star Wars Universe by saying this all powerful race genetically engineered Midichloreans. Surely, they would have to be Immortal if they created the Force, which is immortal itself.

Remember the saying, The Force will be with you, always.

Don't like it one bit. Just go for a simpler race instead of trying to create your own.

[Dark Lord Dyzm]

Space Radiation huh... Hmmm, thats like, everything. Radiation would travel everywhere, even on to planets.

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

It is stronger in space.
And, the whole problem with Imortality was that if someone put a lightsaber through an Imortal, they would survive.
If a Vok gets stabbed by a lightsaber, it would disrupt the energy field of the being and it would disipate into nothing.

[Dark Lord Dyzm]

Lets see, You cant be on Space Ships, massive amounts of Radiation and Electricity flowing through the metal... You Can't Fly through Space, The Radiation Caused by suns will kill you. If you think about it, your species is proberly the weakest thing in the universe. Almost everything will kill it. Question, Does strong magnetic objects also cause damage? Its powerful energy

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

Shields/atmosphere dampen the radiation.
Magnets could disrupt the field, but only very powerful ones.

[Dark Lord Dyzm]

then boom! Your Screwed! The Magnetic Fields on planets are quite powerful! Your Species is Extinct before it lived.

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

Scratch the magnetism thing then.
Instead of posting the problems one by one, put all the problems, so they can be corrected.
The Vok are basicaly in Bata Testing Phase.:D

[Jubei SaDherat Vader]

Scratch the creating the force / dark side, etc...and anything that disrupts the continuity of SW canon

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

A list of what exactly disrupts cannon would be apreciated.
The first change is simple:
Instead of creating the force, they are beings of pure force energy.
One type made of the Dark Side, the other made of the Light Side.

[Jubei SaDherat Vader]

List all the rules of canon?

Just watch the movies and use common sense.

Beings of force energy? You wanna be a midicholrian? Go ahead, I guess...but this Vok thing is a bit on the ridiculous side.

[Grand Admiral Thrawn]

Lucasfilms Limited has also stated that the novels and comic books are respectively canon.

Anything outside of the novels, comics, sourcebooks, or movies is not Canon. In this case, all one would have to do would be to watch Episode I to understand that your species cannot fall within the canon restrictions due to their back history.

[Admiral Lebron]

I wanna be a midi-clorian!


MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHA!

[Grand Admiral Vriss]

:lol XD

[Lady Vader]

Uh, that whole thing about making some story up about where the Force originated or was created by or whatnot... no, I don't think so. Leave all that lore and those particular facts to the movies and EU. It's fine the way it is.

And as to being a creature of energy, well, you [i]could[/] be a midichlorian... though that'd be a pretty dull existance.
Or you could be a bogey, an energy creature that lives in the spice mines of Kessel and is the main food source for the energy spiders that spin the web of glitterstim spice... though that'd be an even more dull existance.

As to any other creatures of energy I can find within "A Guide To The Star Wars Universe", well, it would basicaly require me reading the whole damn book of 597 pages while I make this post. I don't think that's gonna happen.

But that doesn't mean i won't keep my eyes open.

For now, you can actually work on the specifics to the creature you mention... Vok, was it? Figure something out with them where they won't kick the bucket at every radiated turn or whatever.

*Salutes and vies into a 597 page source book... starting with page 1 :x *

[Lady Vader]

Uh, that whole thing about making some story up about where the Force originated or was created by or whatnot... no, I don't think so. Leave all that lore and those particular facts to the movies and EU. It's fine the way it is.

And as to being a creature of energy, well, you [i]could[/] be a midichlorian... though that'd be a pretty dull existance.
Or you could be a bogey, an energy creature that lives in the spice mines of Kessel and is the main food source for the energy spiders that spin the web of glitterstim spice... though that'd be an even more dull existance.

As to any other creatures of energy I can find within "A Guide To The Star Wars Universe", well, it would basicaly require me reading the whole damn book of 597 pages while I make this post. I don't think that's gonna happen.

But that doesn't mean i won't keep my eyes open.

For now, you can actually work on the specifics to the creature you mention... Vok, was it? Figure something out with them where they won't kick the bucket at every radiated turn or whatever.

*Salutes and dives into a 597 page source book... starting with page 1 :x *

[Lady Vader]

Uh, that whole thing about making some story up about where the Force originated or was created by or whatnot... no, I don't think so. Leave all that lore and those particular facts to the movies and EU. It's fine the way it is.

And as to being a creature of energy, well, you [i]could[/] be a midichlorian... though that'd be a pretty dull existance.
Or you could be a bogey, an energy creature that lives in the spice mines of Kessel and is the main food source for the energy spiders that spin the web of glitterstim spice... though that'd be an even more dull existance.

As to any other creatures of energy I can find within "A Guide To The Star Wars Universe", well, it would basicaly require me reading the whole damn book of 597 pages while I make this post. I don't think that's gonna happen.

But that doesn't mean i won't keep my eyes open.

For now, you can actually work on the specifics to the creature you mention... Vok, was it? Figure something out with them where they won't kick the bucket at every radiated turn or whatever.

*Salutes and dives into a 597 page source book... starting with page 1 :x *

[Gitane Van Derveld]

Holy crap, LV...How did you manage to post 3 times? o_O

Anyway... Mhal, seriously, you've been downed by everyone. GIVE IT UP. I mean, at least you put some thought into it, and that was intresting to read, but it just would not work here. If you want a character that has wings and other features, such as a longer lifespan on average, then look into EXISTING species. Otherwise, you need to find another, more broad RP.

Also, the whole "Heaven" and "Angels" thing... If you think about it, it's not gonna work here. SW takes place, as so often said "A long, lon time ago, in a galaxy far, far away" The religions and beliefs of everything in here, though maybe similar, will be different. There may be no such thing in any religion here that talks about Heaven. Or anything like it. Though, someone can feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

What i'm trying to say, is that, even though you put a lot more thought into it this time, the species just isn't going to work. You need to find something that exists in the SW universe, instead of creating your own.

[Vega Van-Derveld]

If you're going to create your own race you need to be realistic and take into account things that have taken place in the Star Wars novels/movies/etc. Try maybe taking an existing race and altering it slightly or splicing two together if you really want to be different - but remember that you can't be a 'god' race, you have to have disadvantages. When I decided to make Vega Lupine, I had to make sure everything would fit and that I wasn't breaking any rules through what I was doing, and from other peoples comments I shaped the idea into something more reasonable, you've got to do that too.

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

Here is Vok version 1.o1:

He is one of a race of energy beings called the Vok that can take many forms, because they don't consist of matter.
They can be disrupted by high energy things such as blasters and lightsabers, as well as space radiation.

They have sometimes been called angels by primitive beings because they have amazing powers that seem to defy mortal abilities to primitive beings

Some interfere in Mortal affairs, while others choose to not get involved.

They came from an alternate universe, sometimescalled Heaven by primitive Mortals.

Because they exist as pure Force Energy, once they form, they live for ever as long as they are not disrupted, and the eldest have been around since what mortals think of as the begining of time.

Some Vok are created from the Dark Side, and are Evil.

They long ago made a new World, called Hell by primitive mortals.

For Eons, Vok fought Vok in a battle of eternal proportions.

But then, sentient beings developed in our world.

These beings could use the force, and became the wild card of the eternal war.

Thus, The Sin War began. good and evil fought to take mortals to thier side.

As the denizens of evil became restless with the War, thier spy, Izual, told them of crystals made of pure Force energy that could be used to trap the Force and harness it. These crystals, called Soulstones, were also able to trap the spiritual essence of Vok.

The Prime Evils made a plan to harness the Soulstones, and staged a false Coup and went to the mortal plain.

The Vok General, Tyreal, showed some warriors how to use the force and soulstones, and they became the Jedi.

The Prime Evils were trapped, and set to work corrupting the Soulstones.

They succeeded, and all got new bodies.

They almost concoured the Mortal Realm, but were stopped by a few heroes and the Last Jedi Master.

They formed a new Jedi, but Tyreal and luckily the Last Evils, and trace Essences of the Prime Evils were trapped in new Soul Stones, accidentaly created by the destruction of the Worldstone.

The world was no longer protected from the Dark Side, but the Leaders of evil were trapped.

They atempt to break out to this day, and can sometimesturn things to the Darkside.

Tyreal used the last of his power to destroy his stone, and sent the other stones to the far corners of the galaxy.

The stone containing Izual, Lord of Treachury, and Azmodan, Lord of Sin, lies on Yavin IV.

The stone containing Diablo, Lord of Terror, and Duriel, Prince of Pain, lies on Dagohbah.

The stone containing Baal, Lord of Destruction, and Belial, Lord of Lies, lies on Kessel.

The stone containing Mephisto, Lord of Hatred, and Andariel, Maiden of Anguish, lies on Tatooine.

Tyreal was throne forward in time as a baby, without memory of being a Vok. Vader found him, and the child pretended to be evil, because he knew, he didn't know why, but he did, that if he was with Vader, there would always be hope of redemtion.

He believed Vaders true principals, that if the Empire wasn't filled with Hate, it would be good, and swore he would create that Empire.

The boy constantly played chess with Palpatie for the SOul of Vader.

That boy, was called Mhalbrecht.

It would be apreciated if people would point out the exact area where something is screwed, so that I can fix it.

This is in Beta Test Phase for an upcomeing RP that I am Planning.

[Jubei SaDherat Vader]

The major sticking points are the immortality, and the beings being created by the force alone.

[Vestec Za Temonta]

Garrh... Mhal. PLEASE. Take our advise and stop this.

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

Here is Vok version 1.02:

He is one of a race of energy beings called the Vok that can take many forms, because they don't consist of matter.
They can be disrupted by high energy things such as blasters and lightsabers, as well as space radiation.

They have sometimes been called angels by primitive beings because they have amazing powers that seem to defy mortal abilities to primitive beings

Some interfere in Mortal affairs, while others choose to not get involved.

They came from an alternate universe, sometimescalled Heaven by primitive Mortals.

They form from Force Energy in a super heated white hole in another Dimension, and they live a few billion years, though gradualy lose Force Energy, though there are some documented cases of Vok encreasing thier life span by draining Force Energy from others.

Some Vok are created from the Dark Side, and are Evil.

They long ago made a new World, called Hell by primitive mortals.

For Eons, Vok fought Vok in a battle of eternal proportions.

But then, sentient beings developed in our world.

These beings could use the force, and became the wild card of the eternal war.

Thus, The Sin War began. good and evil fought to take mortals to thier side.

As the denizens of evil became restless with the War, thier spy, Izual, told them of crystals made of pure Force energy that could be used to trap the Force and harness it. These crystals, called Soulstones, were also able to trap the spiritual essence of Vok.

The Prime Evils made a plan to harness the Soulstones, and staged a false Coup and went to the mortal plain.

The Vok General, Tyreal, showed some warriors how to use the force and soulstones, and they became the Jedi.

The Prime Evils were trapped, and set to work corrupting the Soulstones.

They succeeded, and all got new bodies.

They almost concoured the Mortal Realm, but were stopped by a few heroes and the Last Jedi Master.

They formed a new Jedi, but Tyreal and luckily the Last Evils, and trace Essences of the Prime Evils were trapped in new Soul Stones, accidentaly created by the destruction of the Worldstone.

The world was no longer protected from the Dark Side, but the Leaders of evil were trapped.

They atempt to break out to this day, and can sometimesturn things to the Darkside.

Tyreal used the last of his power to destroy his stone, and sent the other stones to the far corners of the galaxy.

The stone containing Izual, Lord of Treachury, and Azmodan, Lord of Sin, lies on Yavin IV.

The stone containing Diablo, Lord of Terror, and Duriel, Prince of Pain, lies on Dagohbah.

The stone containing Baal, Lord of Destruction, and Belial, Lord of Lies, lies on Kessel.

The stone containing Mephisto, Lord of Hatred, and Andariel, Maiden of Anguish, lies on Tatooine.

Tyreal was throne forward in time as a baby, without memory of being a Vok. Vader found him, and the child pretended to be evil, because he knew, he didn't know why, but he did, that if he was with Vader, there would always be hope of redemtion.

He believed Vaders true principals, that if the Empire wasn't filled with Hate, it would be good, and swore he would create that Empire.

The boy constantly played chess with Palpatie for the SOul of Vader.

That boy, was called Mhalbrecht.

It would be apreciated if people would point out the exact area where something is screwed, so that I can fix it.

This is in Beta Test Phase for an upcomeing RP that I am Planning.

Does the fact that a white hole (the other end of a black hole, where all that energy goes to in thier dimension from ours) clear up how they form from the force?

[Vestec Za Temonta]

-_- Mhal! You just keep copy/pasting it with minor adjustments. It's not getting any better, either.

[Taylor Millard]

Ron...listen. It's creative yes. It draws heavily on most gods lore. One correction: Baal, to the Israelites (under the rule of King Ahab and Queen Jezebel in First Kings), was a god of fertility not a god of destruction.

Now before you go correcting this, let me tell you now. STOP! It's not worth it...really it's not worth it. Frankly, the Council of Vader idea doesn't work either. Nor does the mitechlorines or the stones. It doesn't fit the Star Wars expanded universe

Let me say that again:

IT DOESN"T FIT THE STAR WARS EXPANDED UNIVERSE OR THE FILM ONE!

First off, I've never heard of a white hole. I'll need scientific proof for that one.

2) Pure Force beings. Uh-uh. THey'd be ghosts. Luke could interact with Obi Wan but he never touched him. Besides...disrupting blasters and light sabers...still wouldn't work. NOw some stuff can disrupt lightsabers. But not the FOrce, to my knowledge.

3) The gods and those stones. Huh?? What? No.

4) Mhalwhathisname played chess with Palatie for Vader's Soul? First off, who's Palpatie? Second, Vader's soul would be Anakin Skywalker's soul and Anakin Skywalker's soul is a part of the Force. Doesn't work.

You gotta think about these things.

Is it interesting? Yes. Creative? Yes. Works in the Star Wars universe?

NO!

Take it elsewhere and play it there. Or write it as a story (using original characters out of the SW universe) and save it. Also, please do not rewrite Star Wars history to suit your own. The stuff that I used to write Millard's history is from Star Wars History. Go play TIE Fighter, plus, I believe I ran it by a few people (Mods and RPers alike) to get confirmation it was okay.

Listen, and I mean LISTEN, it doesnt' work okay. It just doesn't. Think on it and use your head. If you're trying to impress people, it's not working. Do your homework, keep your grades up, and then do RPing. And remember this is the Star Wars universe, not StarCraft or something of your own.

It just doesn't work.

*Now goes back to his, "No OOC posting until he returns to RPing rule." Hey, I'm on vacation. I'm just sorry I had to post here and not in an RPing thread. Siiigh...one more month I suppose.

[Domini Leveresk]

Jezebel and Ahab don't count. Jezebel was a Pagan from Palestine, and most Hebrew cursed and hated Baal.

[Lilaena De'Ville]

Domini, I think what Taylor meant was that under the rule of Jezebel and Ahab (yes she was a pagan) was one of the occasions in which Baal worship was prominent among the Israelites...and that was recorded in 2nd Kings...and that was where he got the reference that Baal was actually a god of fertility.

Of course, if you want to talk about the Israelites, there were numerous occasions where they worshipped Baal, Ashtoreth, and even Molech (sacrificing children...tsk tsk)...but I digress ;)

[Domini Leveresk]

Alright: You win. My picture bible doesn't go into that much detail :p

[Mikey the Midichlorian]

No! Without me, you are all nothing!!!

[Leeloo Mina]

Wonders if he's edible

[Seerrasseei Tsseerra]

eww....whjy?

[Vestec Za Temonta]

:lol Midichlorians taste good?

...Hmn... They seem like they would be minty...

--Sniffs Mikey--

[Leeloo Mina]

Actually.. they ARE slightly minty.. sorta taste like that dental floss..

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

Taylor, I think you misread a little.
Blasters and Lightsabers disrupt Vok.
I misspelled Palpetine.
I was using a Metaphor.
All right, I'll just go back to being a being with wings.

[Leeloo Mina]

Like a chicken? CHICKENS ARE COOL, DUDE!

[Arya Ravenwing]

MD: Being just a being with wings is a good idea :) Don't let everyone squash your creativity, but *do* be willing to listen to constructive critism. :) I think you have a good imagination, but as everyone else said, your ideas just wouldn't work in the Star Wars Universe.

I'm sure you'll have other ideas that *will* work. :) Keep at it! But I'd come from a different angle than the "supreme being" angle. More like an underdog who has to struggle to gain powers. Or who lost them...or who has them and doesn't want them...Things like that, challenges, make characters interesting to write and fun to read about.

Of course, using a race that already exists in the SW universe if always helpful, you *can* make up your own race, but it takes a lot of work, as I'm sure you've noticed. If you want help formulating a character, PM me, I'm willing to let you bounce ideas off me if you need a less public sounding board. :P

[Vestec Za Temonta]

Hey Ron, if you want help with making a *sensible* race, buzz me on AIM sometime..(FallenMelusine)

^__^;; I'm always bored.

[Taylor Millard]

Originally posted by Arya Ravenwing
I think you have a good imagination, but as everyone else said, your ideas just wouldn't work in the Star Wars Universe.
I'm sure you'll have other ideas that *will* work. :) Keep at it!

I agree with Arya on this one. You've got a good imagination, but your ideas do not work in SW. But again, keep at it. If you need help, you can email or PM me. I'll be happy to help, if I've got time.

Don't always come from a supreme being form though. Sure we'd all like to be a 'demi-god' of one sort or another, but sometime it doesn't work. Now a winged guy sounds kinda interesting.

I hate to use the comment, 'What's my motivation?' but try to get into his head. If you think he's too powerful scale him down a bit.

But send me a PM and I'll see what I can do to help. And hey, be willing to listen to critism too. It can help sometimes. It really can. I've had more than a few ideas shot down before, 'cause they were bad and didn't fit the character. But critism helps.

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

How many times do I have to say I don't use AIM!
I would appreciate some help, so contact me on MSN at sandy_brophy@hotmail.com.

[Aurelias Kazaar]

There's a Private Message feature in your User Control Panel. That's what we mean by PM. Ain't that hard :cool

[Vestec Za Temonta]

Sorry, Ronny. :p I've never heard to say that, so meh.

And you're really friendly with help, aren'cha?

[Arya Ravenwing]

MD, if you would like my help I made it clear that you could contact me. I'm not going to hunt you down and MAKE you take my advice. Its an offer. Not a candy-gram.

[Mhalbrecht Dalarsco]

Well, you could have posted your MSN in that last post, enabling me to contact you over it.

[Aurelias Kazaar]

*Shakes head.

Did you ever consider that some of us might not have MSN? As I said before, there is a Private Messenger service at SWFans that you can use to get a hold of either Arya or me.

Go to your User CP and click on the thing that says, "Private Messaging."

It isn't that hard, geez louise. If you don't seek help you won't get it, can I remind you of that too?

[Lilaena De'Ville]

Arya doesn't have MSN. Don't be rude when people are trying to help you. If you don't want help, just say so.

[Vestec Za Temonta]

It's the same here. I have AIM only because you don't have to download AIM Express. I can't download things without the risk of my comp access being taken away.. -_-