Blame the Canadians

[Daemon Hyfe]

This records the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US Naval ship and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, Oct 95.

Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations
10-10-95.

CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South, to avoid a collision.

AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North, to avoid a collision.

CANADIANS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

AMERICANS: This is the Captain of a US Navyship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

CANADIANS: Negative. I say again, You will have to divert your course.

AMERICANS: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN. THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET, WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS, AND NUMEROUS
SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY AGAIN, THAT'S 15 DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTERMEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

CANADIANS: We are a lighthouse. Your call.

[Force Master Hunter]

Sorry to knock what is a great story, but that's been verified as a hoax.

[Daemon Hyfe]

So?

[Jeseth Cloak]

Hehe...

[slayn rainyer]

Could be funnier...It could be true and jr.(Bushy boy)the capt....Wait no on second thought it would just make seance...:P

[Delirion]

*scratches head*

Damn, if only I could remember where I've seen that one before.... I remember laughing about this story before...

[Baiohaza Do]

:mad:

*doesn't find it funny*

[Jedah Lynch]

*Still gets a good laugh out of that joke about that Bush guy pretending to be president of the USA*

Oil Tycoon: Can we drill for oil in a nature preserve?

Bush: Sure....how much money did you give me for my campaign?

Oil Tycoon: Several million

Bush: In that case would you like to drill for oil in Teddy Rosevelts head?

:p

[Delirion]

*laughs to anything as long as it isn't a joke about the Irish*

:p

[DarthHERA]

I think I read that story in a Readers Digest once.

(Lynch - the *winks* joke is funnier) :cool:

[Pierce Tondry]

So anyway...

Once upon a time there was this Irish woman named Mara... :p

[Teka Kenobi]

:lol:

[ReaperFett]

Paddy and Murphy are tying to light a fire...

::Sound of Del getting incensed, and attacking Fett::


....And Murphy said "So we can save it for later"


:)

[Delirion]

:lol:

Oh thank you - this just made my day!!!

[Seth Darkserpent]

*Happens to live in Canada*

"Have the fleet go to the far side of Newfoundland. There it will stay, until called for."

[Admiral Jyener]

Wait, wouldn't it be the Lincoln's captain's fault?

[ReaperFett]

say the word Canada, he gets defensive :)

[Admiral Jyener]

lol, yeah that too. I'm just confused on this one.

[Darth Eve]

Sounds like something an American would do, whether the story is true or not. If it's not, then someone is just trying to make a point about something true.

[Satine Capashen]

:lol:

I think I've read that somewhere, but I can't remember where...Ever notice how Canadia is our scapegoat for just about everything...

[Seth Darkserpent]

"A legion of my best Navy Seals awaits them!"

Wait a second...Satine, wtf is Canadia? :)

[slayn rainyer]

I can't really think of anything to say but i really want to pick on bush some more sooooooo...

Oil tycoon:can we drill for oil in a nature preserve?
Bush: Whats a drill?
Oil tycoon:It what we use to dig into the ground to get to the oil
Bush: Oil comes from the ground?! I thaught it came from the Exxon.

Wait wait wait
I just realized that oil is probably the only thing that junior knows about and it wasn't really funny to begin with. So this is just a pointless post and im gonna put it anyways MWuhahahahahahaha HAhahahahahaaha HAHAHAhahahahahaha ...
HA!
:rollin:

[Lady DeVille]

I love Canadians, and all those people from Canada.

You know how they named the country? The leaders all got together and put a bunch of letters in a hat, and then they pulled them out:

"What do they spell?"

"C, eh*, N, eh, D, eh."



*eh, of course is pronounced, AY, like HAY...I'd be TELLING this joke, and it sounds really funny, honest.

[slayn rainyer]

Hmmmm...I belive you...This is a real quote from the discoverers of Canada...
"Surely this is the land god gave to caine"

So go figure....

[Seth Darkserpent]

You know how they named the country? The leaders all got together and put a bunch of letters in a hat, and then they pulled them out:

"What do they spell?"

"C, eh*, N, eh, D, eh."

This proves our School systems are a lot better then those of America :)


Hmmmm...I belive you...This is a real quote from the discoverers of Canada...
"Surely this is the land god gave to caine"

Go figure how we have the best medcare and are one of the most peaceful nations in the world. :D

[Valk Twilight]

Ya know, I love canada as much as the next beaver, but there a willy bunch of people up there ya know. Military masterminds. Hideout forever, become innocent looking, nothing hostile mind you, then STRIKE. Operation Beaver cheese, look it up man, there commin, there commin to getcha!

[ReaperFett]

George Bush recently visited Britain. His first words?
"You people speak English?"
:)

How can you mock Canada, when you have him as your president :)

[slayn rainyer]

Dude chill...That was a real quote...I wasn't mocking...
Are schools do suck,Bush is an idiot and i personally think that the majority of the American people are allot dumber than they get credit for...

[Valk Twilight]

Of course were idiots, all of are great advancements typicaly came from people in other country's giving it to us, like nuclear fusion or the apple pie (which i do believe is chinese in origin)

[ReaperFett]

I wouldnt say Bush is stupid, but he thought Kuwait was what you did when there is a line at a shop
:)


And now, some of his finest quotes:

"I think anybody who doesn't think I'm smart enough to handle the job is underestimating."

"Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning"

"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."

"I think we agree, the past is over."

"I understand small business growth. I was one."

"I think we need not only to eliminate the tollbooth to the middle class, I think we should knock down the tollbooth."

"The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case."

"I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family."

"Put the 'off' button on."

"I would have said yes to abortion if only it was right. I mean, yeah it's right. Well no it's not right that's why I said no to it."

"Down in Washington they're playing with Social Security like it's some kind of government program!"

"It's going to require numerous IRA agents." (This was about tax :) )

"It is clear our nation is reliant upon big foreign oil. More and more of our imports come from overseas."

"They misunderestimated me."

[Ryu Warusa]

Canadia! Most people in Canadia live closer to the south. Namely because that land is only useful for drilling and cutting down and testing bombs on, speaking of which its time for the bombing run right now.

::Leaves this thread::

[slayn rainyer]

lol
I'd like to add two...
"I have no problem hiring blacks;just so long as they can do the cotton picking job"(that was when he was gov. a speech on =opps)
"There's work being done,but there is progress.It's alot of work,but its being done.there is progress."(I don't remember where that one is from...I watch c-span sometimes just to listen to him.)

[Force Master Hunter]

No, Bush is NOT the biggest idiot.

That was the PRIOR President.

[ReaperFett]

Clinton did a lot, for both the US and overseas countries. Ill always respect him fully for that

[Nichos Marr]

Dude chill...That was a real quote...I wasn't mocking...

Sorry, it's a habit. When people diss my country I tend to get all patriotic. :)

[Dark Jedi Jehova]

Patriotism isn't fun.

[Lady DeVille]

Clinton was the true idiot. Bush actually has values, thank God.

Clinton was a lying, cheating, and (edited for content)ing SOB. Really. Do I care that he had an extramarital affair? Well, not really, its none of my business. BUT he lied under oath about it. His campaign contributions from China were always suspect, and he and the Missus stole furniture out of the White House when they left office! The list goes on and on. Why on earth would a country let itself be run by someone who was as unscrupulous as that? Personal life does affect public life, especially in the area of morals. Clinton lied to us again and again. I could never trust him to lead America in the right direction. Maybe into the hands of the Commies, though.

Bush is a much better president than Clinton, and I respect him. Even if he isn't the sharpest crayon in the box (and I don't think he's as near as dumb as your out of context quote make it seem).

[ReaperFett]

Bush is a much better president than Clinton, and I respect him

He wants to drill for oil in Alaska, something CLinton refused to do

Bush is even more supportive of the STar Wars scheme, the thing most likely to start a Nuclear war


He was done NOTHING so far that Id respect him for. And of course, not like hed lie, is it? Bet hes the perfect guy. NOT

[Force Master Hunter]

At least Bush came out and SAID he was going to do it and has so far backed up his campain promises with some real action.

At least he has some HONESTY, unlike, the lying, cheating, snake oil selling bastard in before him. Sure, no politician is fully honest, but I can respect someone who says what he thinks and then goes to DO it. Good for him so far. Maybe he aint the best, but he had the intelligence to surround himself with strong people like Colin Powell who DO know what they are doing.

And at least with Bush, I dont have to worry if he's going to run off and try to shag my wife / daughter / cow / sheep / turkey.

[ReaperFett]

At least he has some HONESTY
How do you know that? How can you say ANYONE is honest?


but he had the intelligence to surround himself with strong people like Colin Powell who DO know what they are doing
He did? HA! More likely the same spin doctors who were telling him what to say and whatnot. There was a big thing over here because Blair had spin doctors. Bush has more, and are used more


And at least with Bush, I dont have to worry if he's going to run off and try to shag my wife / daughter / cow / sheep / turkey

Because naturally, we knew Clinton would the moment he stepped into the office, didnt we?

[Force Master Hunter]

I can see your not even being the slightest bit objective about Bush and you dont want to be.

Tell me something. Why do the people of Texas, the place he governed before taking office rather like him? Two terms I believe he had.

He's a good deal more honest than most politcians and he even admits he gets things wrong and also he admits he doesn't know the answers at times and admits he cant be everything to everyone. If Bush had spin doctors, he would sound like every other damn politician. Political double speak is an art form and obviously, he doesn't know much about it. If he had doctors, he would appear to be less of an idiot.

Ever met Political people? I have. My mum worked for the Liberal Party of NSW and I had the displease of meeting most of them. My God, what a slimy, scum sucking bunch of eels they are. They are lying when they ask how your going. When a slightly honest politican comes along, it's easy to pick - he's the one without the polish, who makes verbal gaffes. Odd, Quayle and Bush are very much like that.

And dont you remeber Clinton had a sex scandal right before he was elected first time?

[ReaperFett]

Tell me something. Why do the people of Texas, the place he governed before taking office rather like him? Two terms I believe he had.

I dont know. Maybe someone who has spent 15 minutes deciding if someone should be given the death penalty makes them feel more safe, despite some cases where even AMnesty International has said he was out of order?

Now, Tell ME something. Why did the people of America vote him in both times? He had two terms too

[Sanis Prent]

The President really isn't the important part of the executive branch, sorry to burst your bubbles guys. All he really does is write speeches, go to dinners, kiss babies, and be on TV. Its his CABINET that truly defines a good president, and if you look at the people that Bush has surrounded himself with...he's got the best cabinet around since the Reagan administration. So, sure, he might not be the most media-friendly prez....but Bush knows how to assemble a team that can work, and thus, he's a pretty damn good president so far :)

[ReaperFett]

yeah I hear Bushs cabinet was great. But then those Swedes sure make good DIY equipment for us to use :)

[Sanis Prent]

Now...if we want to talk Legislative branches :evil:

(looks across the pond)

Last I checked....an uppercut was NOT an accessory to a civilized argument :p

[ReaperFett]

what, you mean Slugger Prescott? Hey, the protester deserved it. ANd what a swing it was :)

[Admiral Jyener]

I think Bush is pretending and trying to look not too smart, so everyone underestimates him. But in his secret lair at night, he's working away at his plan to take over the world!

[ReaperFett]

Bush as a criminal mastermind? Nahhh :)

[Lady DeVille]

You know what I find INFINETELY funny about this thread? It started as a dis on Canada, and deteriorated into a debate about how dumb the President of the United States is (with a person from Australia and one from England debating, no less!) and now all I can do is laugh. :lol:

But I agree with LL and FMH and not with ReaperFett. Mneh! :p

[Morgan Evanar]

I'm not going to post anything except that we are all in deep @#%$ if the environmental policy is going to change for the worst as it has.

[Lady DeVille]

I'm not even going to go into how the Greenhouse affect is total bull. I'm just going to walk away and not say anything. :)

[ReaperFett]

thats ok LD. You just wait until your house is underwater, then what;; you do?

[Jubei SaDherat Vader]

Swim to the fridge and grab a beer.

[Valk Twilight]

All im gonna say is i voted for gore

[Lady DeVille]

:lol: @ Jubei

Gore was a total liar too. Everyone knows that I invented the Internet.

[Nupraptor]

I'm not even going to go into how the Greenhouse affect is total bullThat's effect, not affect. And that's not entirely true. It's not a problem in the way they're making it out to be: We're not creating little holes in the Ozone Layer every time we drive our cars. In fact, a single Volcano eruption has a far worse effect on the atmosphere than the exhaust of every single car since their conception. But the fact is that this planet is getting hotter by the year.

[Force Master Hunter]

In the late 60's early 70's it was a given the world was getting colder and we were all going to freeze.

Seriously, that's what was said by - some of the same people who are now proporting the Greenhouse effect, and for The Exact Same Reasons.

Excuse my doubting about the current prophecies of doom.

[Rama Sha]

Go figure how we have the best medcare and are one of the most peaceful nations in the world.


Thats cause if you got in a fight you would lose. :lol: I mean it's kinda like the nerd at school who is really weak.....he never fights either. :lol:


And Americans are tough! We don't need no medcare.....we go to work sick and wipe our noses with sandpaper just for the hell of it! :D


And if the Us navy told that lighthouse to move! BY GOD THAT LIGHTHOUSE BETTER MOVE IT'S ASS!!!!! :lol:

[Morgan Evanar]

Or we could move it using missiles =]

[Rama Sha]

Damn Straight!

[Anbira Hicchoru]

I'm sure we've got some CV's who know how to relocate things like lighthouses, too.

After all, they did carve a highway from Washington to Alaska in record time. They can do many things

[Lady Vader]

And I have thus far agreed with FMH, LL, and LD (though that whole debate between the Auzzie and the Brit was a bit of a surprise).
And, sorry Fett, I don't agree with you one iota (I wonder how much Clinton bribed the UK?).



Swim to the fridge and grab a beer.

I normally wouldn't grab a beer, but in a case like that... HERE HERE! :lol:



All im gonna say is i voted for gore

Not the best of plans to go saying that aloud.


:lol: !!!!@ Rama

[ReaperFett]

Clinton "birbed" the UK by having strong foreign policies. Now, we have a man who'd rather Aerica had nothing to do with the rest of the world from the seems of it

[Lady Vader]

Birbed? Aerica? Dude, what have you been drinking?! :lol:

And what's this "we"? Did you become a US citizen without our knowledge? Quick! Call the FBI! We've got a spy in our midst! :p

Oh, and about that bit about him not wanting to have anything to do with the world, well, last time I checked, everytime we try to be buddy-buddy with other countries we get harrassed about it. But, turn it right around, we get harrassed if we DON'T try to be buddy-buddy with them.
Sounds to me like a "Damned if you do; damned if you don't."

[Admiral Jyener]

At least we can make fun of ol' dubya. If there's one thing wrong with this country though, it's our presidents. First you have scandles, then you have one drunk and on cocaine, with his daughters drinking too.

That's okay, you think that's bad? Just wait till I'll run for president one day.

[Lady DeVille]

He isn't doing that anymore. Heck, Clinton dodged the draft and did drugs too. Oh, wait, he didn't inhale. Riiight. He didn't do anything with Miss Lewinsky either, don't forget.

And about his daughters...who cares!? No one says anything about Gore's son, and he was in worse trouble the same time as the girls' accident. Heck, I drink too! But not all the time. They're not alchoholics, and if they were I'd feel bad for the guy, not say he's a terrible president.

[Lady Vader]

He isn't doing that anymore. Heck, Clinton dodged the draft and did drugs too. Oh, wait, he didn't inhale. Riiight. He didn't do anything with Miss Lewinsky either, don't forget.

It was the tabloids, wasn't it? :rolleyes:

[Lady DeVille]

Sarcasm, LV, sarcasm

[Lady Vader]

:lol:

I know that, LD. I was just making fun of it! :lol:

[Lady DeVille]

NO! You can't make fun of my sarcasm! Its....its just not *gasp* done! :lol:

[Rama Sha]

We would love to have Forgein relations.......



I can see it now....the American World Empire....Were you'll all pay taxes just like us.:D You Brits should know something about this. :lol:

[Lady Vader]

Touche! :lol:

[ReaperFett]

just remember where a lot of you originate from Rama :)

[Rama Sha]

Scottland? They think you guys are wankers. :lol:

[ReaperFett]

I'm 1/8 Scottish IIRC, and I think youre worse :)

[Rama Sha]

Oh I figured as much Fett. It's your sunny disposition that clued me in. :lol:

[ReaperFett]

Well, I had to let you figure SOMETHING out :)

[Rama Sha]

Oh come on Fett.......don't let all those pesky wars were beat/saved you ass get in the way of our friendship. We can bridge the Alantic! :D



I feel a hug comeing on! :D