to face ones past

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire looked at her corellian VY 2400, Blood Rider, and no smile touched her face as she saw how close they were to the destination.
It had been a long time since she had been back to where her planet, Alenn, once stood and she had no desire to visit the 'new' planet that had myseriously appeared. She wasnt even sure it existed, only trusting sources of one of her race that had died from the explosions radiation a few weeks after. Her old planet had blown up by the imperials latest laser ray and her whole dragonlord speciaes had been wiped out, only leaving the other dragonlord races. Her planet, her home and her family all gone by those imperial she dispised. So many memories rested on that dead planet and so many things she'd rather not relive::

::She returned her attention to the beeping of the Blood Riders control system and sighed as she saw a message appear on the screen. Fifteen minutes away the location of her old planet and supposedly new planet::

:;She looked at MnT sitting beside her on the weapon control seat. He had volunteered to come, but it had still taken convincing.
Her letter calling her back to the planet by an unknoown source, saying she must confront her past, that it was her destiny had shaken her. Saphire had no wish to go. The arguement that there would be adventure had been the only salvation of the reasoning to take this trip. MnT seemed to know her pretty well know. Not many people did, she didnt like many people knowing her too well.
People came, you value them as a friend and then they go forever::

::Her eyes met with MnT's for a second as he looked at the screen and she smiled thinly, tightly::

Nearly there Miryan.

::Her eyes widened when a feeling crossed her mind, her world going blank then.......::

[Miryan no Trunks]

*He was not sure what exactly it had been, that had compelled him to come along on this journey.. He knew little of Sapphire's past, but from a few small things she'd said before, was able to figure out that whatever was causing her destiny to be going in the loops it seemed to be, had something to do with her past.. Perhaps he was here, merely to support his friend, in a time of need.. But then, he thought, why would he have insisted on them carrying out the journey? Perhaps he was truly being optimistic that they'd find something that would help to snap Sapphire out of the funk she'd been in.. It did seem rather unlikely that they'd find anything important, but he'd still had a strange feeling, like they should... Or perhaps...*

*MnT felt Lady Sapphire's eyes upon him, and looked over..*

"Nearly there Miryan."

*With a pleased smile, and a nod, MnT was about to turn his vision to the monitors, to see what they were coming up on, when something happened. Saph's face suddenly lost all color, going completely pale, her eyes completely whited-over, and her features began melting together. MnT calmly watched as the ship began to lost all texture and hue, becoming a single grey, merely a few shades darker than Sapphire. He considered what this must be like for Sapphire, seeing the same thing happening to him, as was happening to her. He had rarely ever seen another person go through a dimensional rift before, and it still fascinated him, how the process worked.. It was like taking information on a computer, and cut/pasting it.. Time essentially would stop for the target, the details of it's existance would be taken from one dimension, and left in the next, awaiting the body of the target to arrive, to apply itself to again. It was a weird feeling, having your memories and thoughts taken from your mind, only to return a second later, but one that MnT was used to.. Then he went blank*

......

*MnT opened his eyes, and turned his head towards the forward monitor.. There was the planet... But why had the dimension been crossed? The location was the same, coordinates matching what they had been a moment before, but now there was a planet where there had been none before.. Deciding it didn't really matter, they were there now anyways, MnT turned to Lady Sapphire, and spoke*

.. Sapphire.. Are you ok..? How did you enjoy your first para-dimensional rift...?

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire looked at MnT, still feeling dizzy. That had been totally out of her control and she hadnt liked it. She had just faded to nothing, just been nothing::

What was that? That was plain disturbing.
I'd rather not do that again.

::She looks confused as she sees her planet. there was something famliar, eerie about it.
Blood Rider landed softly on the ground and she looked around, memories blurring her mind. Mental hits banging her to the ground.
The lake stood there as usual, beautiful green water. The missing sound of no flame birds made the place...empty.
The sun shone over the golden grassy slopes, as if no war had been upon this land. Yet looking into the distance there was a dark marshy patch of brown. Just like the practise battlegrounds that had been there in her childhood.
This was wrong. The new planet was supposed to be perfect, there shouldnt be the battlefeilds there::
::In the west of the distance stood buildings. Buildings? But people had to build buildings, the new planet had no people to build buildings. her eyes grew more confused and she turned into the western direction::

This is wrong Miryan, there is something wrong.
That battlefield should not be there, nor the buildings.


::The house she had once lived in beckoned to her as she saw in her minds eye the ugly, tall stone building with the black roof::

I guess we better look around huh?
Lets start with the village.

[Miryan no Trunks]

*MnT smiled softly as Sapphire made her displeasure at the effects of the rifts well known..*

.. That.. was my transportation of choice.... One gets used to it.... It wasn't my doing though, and I don't know why it happened... but we're here..

*As they landed, He listened to her words, and nodded... Sapphire was right.. something Was wrong here... MnT couldn't quite put his finger on it, but there was something.... There was something completely unnatural about the feel of the planet.. Not just the area they were in, but the entire planet..*

... Right...

[SapphireDragoness]

::She nodded and walked softly down the yellow patch of grass, her feet finally echoing on the stoney ground of the village opening. Everythign was the same. There was even washing on the lines out the window. what the hell was going on!?::
::No noise disturbed the silence that echoed into nothingness. Shivering her eyes set upon one particular house::

::She runs up to her old house and smashes the door in for no particular reason. She'd always wanted to do that.
The room contained the same furniture, the same pictures and the same smell it always possessed. That soft smell her mothers perfume always wavered around everyones nose.
She passed the family photo wall without looking. She headed straight for her mother and fathers room. Well, at least she could take his saber 'killer' as a prize.
She left Miryan at the first room and climbed the dirt stained stairs::

[Miryan no Trunks]

*As MnT slowly walked throughout the house, he grew more and more troubled... it was obvious that the house had had people in it an hour ago at the absolute Longest.. Washclothes were still wet, there were drawers half opened, there was even a meal sitting in mid-preperation in the kitchen.. But there wasn't anyone there... And worse yet, when a living thing passes through an area, it leaves a slight "ghost" of life-energy, that remains for about 30 hours.... There wasn't even a Trace of it Anywhere in the house, with the exception of where him and Sapphire had been..*

... This is completely wrong..... It's like nothing's ever Actually lived here.. even though there are so many signs displaying otherwise...

*MnT felt a chill run down his spine, which was a fairly rare event...*

... I wonder what Sapphire's finding...

[SapphireDragoness]

::Going up the stars Saphire shivered. It had the same forboding feeling of her father, As if any minute he'd come up and beat her for going to his room. She could even taste blood on her lip. She could feel her brothers presence near too, as if Anarak was right next to her. It brought her close to going soft but she hardened herself, remembering that he's dead.
Opening the door she walked into the room. The room was neat as always, her fathers blades neatly showing on the walls, her mothers picture hanging beside the bed.
She could see her father and mother in here, as if it was yesterday. her fathers voice raging all over the house as he relized his children were hiding behind the door, watching him beat up his wife.
Saphire looked at the cupboards and opened them carefully, knowing full well there was an alarm-like system her mother kept. Things were creepy, but she'd play alogn with it.
She waited until the trap thjat never went off started and frowned as she oped a drawer. The clothes were still there folded in the drawer, the smell of her mothers perfume waffling in the air.
Chucking cloths on the floor she opens the secret box inside and brings out a saber that is silvery when ignited. Saphire touches the hilt carefully and feels the on switch.
She walks out of the room, the smell fo perfume was getting too strong and she wlaks down the stairs, the smae eerie feeling of her brother around her only to look at MnT studying her as she comes down::

::She looks down on what he's studying::

It's my fathers saber. I couldnt be bothered looking at my room

::Saphire doesnt let it slip that she didnt have the guts to look in her room and the memories it held::

[Miryan no Trunks]

*MnT heard the words, but did not fully believe her... Something in her aura didn't feel right.. She was probably hiding something, but it was not his place to probe...*

... I found... I found a lot, but nothing seemingly significant to your search.. What I found, was that it seems that this house was lived in, until about the same time that we went through the rift.... However, and this is very disconcerning, I also found that there are no signs of there having ever actually been Life here.. One's ki usually leaves traces, but there are none here, with the exception of our own...

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire nodds slowly and accidently drops her fathers saber. The saber hiuts the ground and the hilt opens up revealign a peice of paper saphire had long forgotten::

It cant be....

::She looks at it as if it was diseased. She had a copy of that in her room. Now or never......::

::Saphire ehads up the stairs again and cautiously opens the door to the dark and dingy room. She opens the dusty draw that had never been opened as a kid accept for rare times and a peice of paper and two old dull photos fell out. The photo was of her brother and parents and a mysterious boy she now knew as Karsar. The second one was of two other friends that had dissapeared long ago with no trace and no goodbyes. That wasa local story, things like that had happened a lot and was considered normal. She remembered their laughter still, and cringed at what would have probably happened. She pocketed the photos, sayign nothing and opened the paper. A poem hwer mother recited many times was written in her mothers beautiful writing::

When Love beckons to you, follow him
Though his ways are hard and steep
And when his wings unfold you yeild him
Though the sword hidden among his feathers may wound you
And when he speaks to you believe in him
Though his voice may shatter your dreams.

::Saphires eyes swelled with unwanted tears. This wa swhat her mother recited whenever her father hit her mother and did somethign thta was hard to register or live with. Thsi is what she would recite to us when he tortured his family, one by one for a hard day or a defeat on his part::

NO! no. I cant... Make it stop. please...

::Her fatehrs eyes leered in her mind and she felt every sting and wound he had ever encountered on ones she loved. he had a lot to answer for and a lot that she couldnt forgive, she didnt want to remember::

please....

[Miryan no Trunks]

*MnT walked up the stairs slowly, waiting outside the room.. He could hear Saph choking back tears, and knocked on the door...*

... Sapphire.. Are you alright..? What's wrong..?

*He knew well that she was likely Not alright, but it was too late to erase the words now..*

[SapphireDragoness]

:;Saphire doesnt respond, she walks over to the bed and looks at her families photo again and is about to rip it when she looks up at a familiar face::

You dont know what it was like. How he hurt us, how he messed us up. How much these things live on when you have one sentence your father said to you, his last words to you befroe he dies. Your worthless saphire, you'll come down to nothing.

::Saphire gets up abruptly and faces the mirror::

You knwo what, maybe he's right. I failed at beign a jedi, and I sure as hell aint goin well as a sith. Look how weak I am.

:;She looks at Miryan level in the eye and turns to walk away::

Dont get mad, get even.
I dotn live by that poem anymore, its a bunch of crap.

::She throws the poem to the ground and leaves it there at Miryans feet::

A bunch of crap.

[Miryan no Trunks]

*Looking briefly down at the shredded paper on the ground, MnT began walking forward, to catch up to his friend..*

... Sapphire.. you are not weak, not in the least.... I think.., Excuse me if I'm wrong, but I think the reason you find yourself not going anywhere is because you've lived your life under the belief that you had to prove yourself to a person who's not alive to admit he was wrong...

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire laughed coldly and turned around::

He's always been wrong, but he's my father. I dont know anyhting about your family or your past but when i was young all i wanted was my father to be proud of me, and you know what? He was so blind he could not see that small innocent child in front of his eyes, wnting one single nice word.
You live a long time with someone and still dont know them at all, but he's my father. His words meant something to me Miryans. Ones words should be ones truth, I've always believed that and I always will.
Tell me, how do i erase those words from his mind?

::Saphire stared at Miryan silently, sending him one tiny mind message for future reference::

[i]anything that is said here stays here[i]

[Miryan no Trunks]

*Listening to the words, MnT closed his eyes, and sighed, before replying..*

... I've never known a family.. My parents were killed by the Jedi when I was but a child.. Before I can remember, anyways... As for one's words being one's truth..

*He opened his eyes and stared into her own..*

... It's the way it should be, but it's not the way it is.. Some people lie to get ahead, because they don't care about who it hurts.. Others just don't say anything because they don't want to face the consequences of their words.. Perhaps...

*He hesitated a moment, thinking over what he was about to say.. He would be making assumptions on a man he did not know, and he didn't feel particularly right about it.. Still though, he thought what he had to say might strike a chord in Sapphire that could help turn things around....*

... Perhaps your father wanted you to be as strong as you could be, and felt that telling you you were great or whatever words you wanted from him would only hinder you.. That by knowing you had met his goals, you would stop striving to become stronger... Unfortunately, the need to grow stronger is useless without a reason to get there.. If you don't have a goal, what will you use the strength for once you have it..?

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire stares at him::

My father was the leader of a whole planet, he controlled our weather, he was held in fear by everyone.
He had great power, he didnt need that power. I was in no way a threat to his mightiness.
You sound like you know him.

::She is abotu to say somehtign when she hears a voice from behind that freezes her insides::

[i]sa[hire, its time to come...[i]

[Miryan no Trunks]

*MnT looked on in slight confusion as she spoke.. After what he had said, it didn't entirely make sense.. A moment after, her facial expression made it known she was going to add more on, but she just stopped, not saying a word..*

... Sapphire..? Is everything all right..? What's wrong..?

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire uncharitaristically looks at Miryan, all the fears in her eyes unmasked and present::

he's here.....in this room. he's here.....


:;She unsheaths her dragon balde and looks around to see a large figure loom in the room. dark green eyes flash and black hair hides a hard cold face. Large muscles and huge shoulders covered by a red robe make her look and her hand shivers::

Father......

[Miryan no Trunks]

*MnT unsheathes Damnation's Touch and brings it to a battle position in the time it took Sapphire to blink. He didn't know who the robed man was, but from the looks of him, he was fairly well built. Not quite as muscular as himself, but the robes draped over the man's bodily a lot more complimentary than a trenchcoat.. *

*As Sapphire spoke, MnT was taken back in shock.. Wasn't her father dead?*

... Sapphire...

*He said her name merely as hopes that she would know what was going on, and could explain..*

[SapphireDragoness]

::The mans face, the strong jawline and the fire in his eyes, similar to saphires own shines with amusement. His muscles showing move smoothly as he gets out his saber, without turnign it on. Saphire looks shocked, but sahe had his saber.. She looked over the bed and there was an exact copy of it. They were both her fathers.
His laugh rumbled around the room, like a volcano abotu to pour out lava and hes mighty hands gripped his saber::

Youve grown Up saphire, but I still sense your weakness.
You look like your mother, are you as senseless as her?

::saphires eyes fill with rage at the disgrace of her mothers name and she is reminded of the rijng she once gave to a master before she switched::

How how dare you!!??

::her father walks up to her, green eyes meet green eyes, black hair meets black hair and he grabs her arm::

I dare because I am your father and I am better than you, I always will be.

::saphires eyes go wide and her mind fills with pain as his face grows harder::

[Miryan no Trunks]

*As Sapphire's father spoke, MnT began charging ki energy through the metals of his sword, letting it flow freely into the blade, which started to glow, a purplish hue adding to the others of the room..*

.. Wait... no...

*MnT held his place, not about to attack.... A moment of clarity, and felt he understood what was going on... To help Sapphire out could ruin their entire trip, and her future... this would be her battle... Backing off slightly, MnT cast his eyes to his friend, closed them, and let his thoughts touch her own, telepathically..*

" ... Sapphire, this battle is yours... good luck..."

[SapphireDragoness]

::Her fathers menacing grin paralyzes saphire and as her world goes balck both bodies drop to the ground, leaving only Miryan standing in the room..........::

::Saphire opens her eyes and looks around at the rbeath takign scene. Soft green grass blows in the wind and rocks form scenes of utter beauty. Trees sway in the soft fresh air and the sound of a water fall comes behind her. Her father was getting up too a few miles away and she shivered despite the warm weather this place held::

::Her fathers tall fram got up and she turned to face him as she got up::

::Using all her strength her eyes flash and she speaks::

When love beckons to you, follow him.
Though his ways are hard and steep
And when his wings unfold you yeild him
Though the sword hidden among his feathers may wound you
And when he speaks to you believe in him
Though his voice may shatter yoru dreams....

remember that father. I wont live be it anymore, NEVER!
I wont let you rule me!

::D ragon Saryin gets up and laughs, pure force pulls her towards him, more power than Dara held, more power than any sith held. No one would dare fight him, and tears wrre nearly evident in Saphires eyes::

I'm not worthless ::the whisper dissapears into the air and is not heard by anyone::

[Dragon Saryin]

:;Dragon feels the power in his hands, in his fingers, in his soul and he thrives as he holds his daughter tightly around the throat, using the psychic connection and waving pure pain through to her mind. He can feel every part fo her mind scream in terror and this only makes his own mind laugh with glory. She had grown up but her feeligns towards him hadnt changed. he still didnt understand why he had been brought back, back into the cross between the spiritual and physical world, but he wasnt complaining::

::He lets go of Yaran as she kicks him in the groin and his expression turns into fury. She still had that fire he never had in her. her mind was likely to explode with incredible power soon, and he must squash it down again, with the little time he had now. He looked at his daughter, her face tear stained and her expression full of fire he had never seen before in no-ones eyes but his reflections. She was the spitting image of him, though he would never admit it.
Dragon was, had always and would always be better than anyone, and he would prove it to one who seemed close to shattering his illusion he had wrapped around himself for his whole life::

Ah, Yaran...Your a fiesty one, like Astarinya, your mother. And look how I squashed her spirit, look how I defeated her soul into following a greater mind, me.

Yes Yaran, You are worthless, i heard that. In my eyes you are...you will end up nothing. what happened with the jedi? you FAILED! you failed that test and now your coming back to your original path set by ME. Yes, I have followed both my children......
What of Karsar? I banned him from our planet and yet he still found his family? where is he now? do you see him anymore?
no.... He has forgotten you also. You werent worth his time little one....

:;Dragon laughs at his daughters look of anger, of embarressment and of ...yes...a look of failure. he knew of her moral standards and her loyalty. he suspected her old loyalty to her jedi master had faded, but it was still there to cut a deep wound into her mind. he had worked hard to crush every strong side of his childrens mind as far as he could, but she had escaped and become strong. But her walls were falling....he was winning.....::

[SapphireDragoness]

::She could feel his spirit squashign hers as he had done so many years ago, all that strength she had built up voer the years breaking away. She stang at the words of her brother, stang just like the time he had balmed her for her mothers death, though his words had been true. She ahd distracter her mother and paid for her mothers blood on her hands::

I am NOT worthless! I made it and I'll be a better sith than you ever will..

:;It took all her strength to say that and to her utter surprise he flinched, he actually flinched. Dragons cocky smile came back quickly and his laugh cut like a knife::

Child, you may be older but you still ahve much to learn.
Everyone you know ends up dead or hurt. Your mother died, yoru bestfriend long ago dissapeared and never was found, yoru brother never talks to you, and look at your last marriage. Dont tell me youve made something of yoruself Yaran, you've just struggled all the way..

::His sneer sent a message to her heart, and she felt somehtign she hadnt felt in a while, some strenght Warren Azalin ahd given to her, even though he was a jedi, had given to her and made her stronger. She would always thank him for that::

My brother is dead, you knw that. My ex is a jedi and i was sith, even a fool like you would know that doesnt work.
Long ago you said Im worthless, well I've finally figured somethign out father, I'm not worthless. You are more worthless than I. You've hidden my powers as long as you can out of fear, out of that fear that I'm stronger, smarter and faster than you ever could have been. You hid my brothers potential but your not hidding mine, not anymore!

::Saphire stood stunned. Where had that come from? Had she said that? Confusion was on the sith womans face and fury on the males::

I'm sure yoru mother woudl agree with tha child!! Yaran, you KILLED your mother.

::His words hit the spot and tears welled in saphires eyes, unwanted tears that had waited for years to come out, emotions thta ahd waited for years to be released. Her mind whirled and thunder struck in the air, fury penetrated every cloud appearign into the blackening sky::

You..you...You have no right to say that, to torment me like that! You didnt care aout her at ALL! Not at ALL! You dont care about anyone but yourself. I will NOT BE LIKE YOU!
NEVER! I will nto go donw to yoru level...father....

:;Her voice was icy, like the coldest of wind in the hardest season of the antartic, and she felt the truth penetrate her soul. She ahd not killed her mother and as she stared into her fathers eyes she felt for once in her life, free. Free from hsi grasp, he would not touch her again. Her mother and herself could live or rest in peace. The past was ast and for once the future had no clouds of past interference::

I am the master of my soul, the master of my future, you have no say anymore!!!

::Fury and pure joy mixed into the clouds and fear lay in her fathers face as her mind unlocked lettign out those hidden secrets of her inner soul. She was free and he had finally realized his mistake. Her father would pay, but she looked at him and felt pity..not anger anymore..pity. He did not deserve to die by her hand, even though technically he was dead. A smile lit her lips and she started to walk away::

GO to where you belong spiteful one...I found my way, I thank-you for that father. This is the one gift I will ever love you for...

::The sith woman walked into the air, leaving behind the pain and misery that was her past, remembering the bad and good times, but the emotions that made her what she was before was stripped. Her emotional cage was open and as the door closed for the last time, no soul was left behind, no small child huddling in the corner, fearing that hand of pain was left behind. The Child was free and there was no going back.
Saphire didnt know how she felt, or what she would feel later, but for now the pure taste of victory was enough. This trip had come to something, she was meant to ahve come here...

She heard a howl of a man with pure anfguish and as tears of pity touched her face, her smile stayed the small. Now he woudl know the pain fo all those years.::

[Dragon Saryin]

OOC: lol, ok. the last post was long.

IC:
Dragon stared at the face of his daughter, at the way her eyes changed colour, he stared at horror as the eyes turned brown, that trap he had put on her a logn time ago was striped, gone. All that work, all that power hidden tha ahd made green eyes now turned back to the original brown::

NOOOOOooo!

::His yell as his green eyes followed his daughter leaving left echoed as every part fo his beign that had remade him for an unknow reason, but now known was pulling him apart. He had set her free without knowing...He had lost...::

::A silent curse, and maybe even an angry, sullen look of unwanted father pride came into his eyes. Shehad turned out having his stubborness, and that had made him lose. To hate but to love, one more scream of anguish and anger lit the sky as his world he ahd just been cast into blackened into the nothingness of what he had come to live with in the world of spirits.....::

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire wakes up, someon holding her up, brown eyes open and a small smile lights up on the angelic looking sith as she feels a weight off her shoulders fly away..forever::

Im ok..

::Her eyes go to her fathers saber, she would keep that and use it as a way of rememberance. She had other business, for another day::

[Miryan no Trunks]

*The second Sapphire had began to respond again, MnT had sat her up, leaning her against him, so as to help her fully wake up..*

... Sapphire, are you alright?

*Her response left a huge grin across his face, but that was soon replaced by surprise, as she opened her eyes and looked towards the saber that lay by her unmoving father's side..*

... Your eyes have changed color... What happened..?

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire looked at the mirror as she unsteadily got upo, her mothers eye colour staring back at her::

I..I dont know. Maybe its a sign.

::Her smile reflected with the light reflections coming onto the mirrors surface and bouncing off::

I won Miryan, I didnt fight him to the end, I left him and walked away...but I won.

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire looked at the mirror as she unsteadily got up, her mothers eye colour staring back at her::

I..I dont know. Maybe its a sign.

::Her smile reflected with the light reflections coming onto the mirrors surface and bouncing off::

I won Miryan, I didnt fight him to the end, I left him and walked away...but I won.
The trap of the father is gone, and I defeated my own personal trap layed out by him.

::Saphire turned to face MnT and smiled softly::

I relized the truth, and you know what? It feels good.

[Miryan no Trunks]

*MnT smiled.. He had been right about the whole situation, from the start... He had not known what to expect, but his thoughts on her problem had been proven true...*

... I'm glad to hear that... I hate to rush celebration, but the emptiness of this planet is leaving me unnerved, and I wish to leave it as soon as we can.. Is there anything else you wish to do..?

[SapphireDragoness]

::Saphire nodds::

yes, it is time we go.. thank you Miryan

::Surprising him she give Miryan a hug and goes out the door, walking towards her ship. She did have amother thign to do, but that could wait, and Miryan had done more than enough for her, he had done mroe than she could repay::