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View Full Version : Well, this is awkward...



Captain Untouchable
Mar 7th, 2013, 06:08:47 PM
I don't want to be melodramatic (for a change :uhoh), but this is something that is probably going to leave a lot of people in the lurch, so I felt I owed it to you all to give you a proper explanation.

You all know that I'm kind of ill right now, but I've mostly been too proud to go into any specifics about it. The doctors aren't really sure what it is: what matters is that it's having a pretty adverse affect on my physically and mentally. Between the symptoms and the impact they've been having on my sleep, my brain power has been steadily declining over the last few years. It's been quite a while since I have been able to read books, and it's now reaching the point where even reading posts is a struggle. For someone who studied astrophysics but now has to count up on his fingers, it's all pretty frustrating.

It's also reached the point where writing posts is much harder. You've probably noticed that I've been getting quite pushy on spurring up activity lately. The reason is that I'm desperate to keep exercising the writing part of my brain: posts that would have taken me minutes in the past are now taking agonising hours, and if I spend too long without writing I'm worried that I won't be able to start up again.

However, it's reaching the point where my desire to keep writing at all costs is adversely impacting other people: and I can't stand for that behaviour in myself. I think it's best (for myself as much as for anyone else) for me to hang up my keyboard for the foreseeable future. Maybe I'll be better in a matter of months, or I could be like this indefinitely: there's no way for me to know, and I can't in good conscience screw you guys over like that.

I have my fingers in a lot of pies, so it's not like I can scurry off into the night without having an impact. Where I can - with your help - I'll try and tie up loose ends and scurry off gracefully. This is not an impulse decision, so please don't think that: it is however a rather unpleasant one for me bearing in mind how big a part of my life roleplaying here has been for such a long time, so you'll have to forgive me for making a big deal out of it.


For Star Wars -
I know that the Dan/s'Il situation is something I'm quite heavily entrenched in, so if you guys are willing to be patient with me, I'll try and muscle my way through to the end of that arc so that Vansen can fly away from the Wheel into obscurity without too much muss or fuss. I'm sure I can probably do something similar with the Vanguards arc: I'm sure Charley can help me cook up something suitably exit-worthy for my characters there. There are a few characters that I'm kind of possessive of, but if anyone wants to take characters off my hands to minimise the disruption (be that now, or at any point in the future), the worst I can do is say no. If anyone wants anything finished off, please hit me up ASAP so that I can get it done before I can't.

For Mutants -
I wasn't planning anything between now and the riots anyway, and that seems like a suitable place for most of my characters to start getting lost. I'm really sorry to Droo and Vince in particular on this front: if you guys (or anyone else) want to try and soldier through threads we had planned just so that they're done and on record, I'm happy to try. I'm much less attached to my Mutants characters in general, so if people want my stuff feel free to ask for it.

For DC -
I got way too heavily involved in this which was really stupid of me, all things considered. That said, interest has been steadily waning on this, so I guess I can take some solace in the fact that it probably would've fizzled out with or without me anyway. If there's a surge in activity, and my horde of characters is needed... see above.

I'm not out for sympathy, so please don't give me any - I'm so frugal with the details of this to avoid that kind of thing, and in all honesty it makes me feel ridiculously uncomfortable and guilty. If there are things you want to finish or characters you want to appropriate, chime in.

If not... hush up, else I'll fall back on my default threat and mail bees to your house. :shakefist

Lilaena De'Ville
Mar 7th, 2013, 06:20:51 PM
Don't feel uncomfortable or guilty, you know that we all think that Real Life comes first before any RP obligation. If you need to step back and take an extended or indefinite LOA, then you should. Especially if your quality of life is impacted adversely. Take the time to get your health in order or controlled, or figured out.

The good thing is you're telling us rather than just disappearing. I think the break will be good for you, and I wish you all the best. I'll see you on Facebook I'm sure. :hug

Captain Untouchable
Mar 7th, 2013, 06:23:30 PM
Don't feel uncomfortable or guilty, you know that we all think that Real Life comes first before any RP obligation. If you need to step back and take an extended or indefinite LOA, then you should. Especially if your quality of life is impacted adversely. Take the time to get your health in order or controlled, or figured out.

The good thing is you're telling us rather than just disappearing. I think the break will be good for you, and I wish you all the best. I'll see you on Facebook I'm sure. :hug

It's not the having to do it that makes me feel uncomfortable - I'm just so stubborn that I don't like admitting that there's anything wrong.

And I said no sympathy. Mail beeeees! :shakefist

(but thanks)

Dee
Mar 7th, 2013, 09:28:07 PM
http://i51.tinypic.com/mha9uf.jpg

Park Kraken
Mar 8th, 2013, 03:52:13 AM
As Holly said, do whatever you have to do to get better. We'll be fine here and awaiting your return. :thumbup

TheHolo.Net
Mar 8th, 2013, 08:38:57 AM
Best wishes.

Cirrsseeto Quez
Mar 8th, 2013, 12:13:10 PM
Let me know if there's anything I can do for ya, brother.

Loklorien s'Ilancy
Mar 8th, 2013, 12:23:00 PM
^What he said.

We talked last night for a tiny bit I know, but I'm gonna be online all weekend so we'll be able to have more time to chat.

Dragon
Mar 8th, 2013, 10:59:53 PM
Know that while we greatly value your contributions to Fans, we value you a whole lot more. Best wishes, and feel free to contact me if you want to shoot the breeze about anything at all.

Morgan Evanar
Mar 8th, 2013, 11:12:55 PM
Damn man. I know stuff has been rough. I hope someone can figure out wtf is going on with your body =/

Miranda Tarkin
Mar 9th, 2013, 09:25:44 AM
hugs you :glomp

Emelie Shadowstar
Mar 10th, 2013, 10:29:35 AM
:( *hugs* boo...

Captain Untouchable
Mar 11th, 2013, 08:31:39 PM
I've been talked into keeping a couple of characters simmering, for my sanity as much as anything else. I will only have a couple (instead of fifty bajillion), and I'll only have background people like Regan Altink, or old bureaucrats like Vansen Tyree: people who can potter about and be in threads from time to time, but no one who is going to hold up any major stories or anything.

At last count, there's only four. Please make sure to let me know if a) there's any threads/plots you want to urgently deal with, b) any minor characters (siblings/dads/etc) you'd like me to try and keep up with, or c) any characters you'd like taken off my hands.

Also, I want to last hurrah / blaze of glory some people, if anyone has any input / requests / suggestions regarding that.