Any Twi-Hards May Want To Avert Their Eyes....

[Rutabaga]

I'm not a Twi-Hard, I'm a Twi-Hater :evil. Read the first book and considered it to be a goofy poorly written angsty teenage romance, just not my cup of tea at all. So I couldn't help but laugh when I saw this...oh, if only, if only!

<a href="http://roflrazzi.com/2009/07/18/celebrity-pictures-radcliffe-pattinson-stab-sparkle/"><img src="http://roflrazzi.wordpress.com/files/2009/07/celebrity-pictures-radcliffe-pattinson-stab-sparkle.jpg" alt="daniel radcliffe and robert pattinson" title="celebrity-pictures-radcliffe-pattinson-stab-sparkle" width="428" height="285" class="mine_4615806" /></a><br />see more <a href="http://roflrazzi.com">Lol Celebs</a>

[Tear]

Whats a twi?

[Miranda Tarkin]

Twi(barf)light saga crap

[Taataani Meorrrei]

I hate this franchise harder than I hate almost anything nerds have ever made.

[Darth Turbogeek]

I hate this franchise harder than I hate almost anything nerds have ever made.

I lost a bet and had to see New Moon.

Bad?

No, TPM is bad. Ameile is bad The last Indiana Jones was bad. Transformers 2 was bad. New Moon is a sick, repulsive joke that I am struggling to insult with enough venom. It is the single worst piece of utter decrepit shit that I have ever seen in a theatre. I hate any person associated with tis abuse to the senses and I utterly hate any fuckwit who laps this utter crap up, becaue you have been part of infliciting the worst mental damage possible.

No wait, you HAVE to be mentally damaged to even bear this shit. And fuck you if you are offended by that statement, look at your utter sad lives, realise how undereducatesd you are and go learn how to read.

Holy shit, New Moon was offensive in it's awfulness. And the fangirls are just plain stupid. Or cant read beyond 2nd grade level.

I'm so going to get back at the bugger who bet me.

[Dasquian Belargic]

I really dislike Twilight but I can't help but feel sorry for Robert Pattinson right now. I know he must be rolling in money but still... he is going to foreverbe Edward Cullen in the eyes of so many hysterical morons.

[Rutabaga]

I hate this franchise harder than I hate almost anything nerds have ever made.

I lost a bet and had to see New Moon.

Bad?

No, TPM is bad. Ameile is bad The last Indiana Jones was bad. Transformers 2 was bad. New Moon is a sick, repulsive joke that I am struggling to insult with enough venom. It is the single worst piece of utter decrepit shit that I have ever seen in a theatre. I hate any person associated with tis abuse to the senses and I utterly hate any fuckwit who laps this utter crap up, becaue you have been part of infliciting the worst mental damage possible.

No wait, you HAVE to be mentally damaged to even bear this shit. And fuck you if you are offended by that statement, look at your utter sad lives, realise how undereducatesd you are and go learn how to read.

Holy shit, New Moon was offensive in it's awfulness. And the fangirls are just plain stupid. Or cant read beyond 2nd grade level.

I'm so going to get back at the bugger who bet me.

You have my deepest sympathies. Seriously.

I have to admit that a co-worker is completely right, if I had read the book before the big "it's the biggest thing since Harry Potter and Stephanie Meyer is the next JK Rowling!" hype, I probably wouldn't have reacted so harshly. I still wouldn't have been impressed, but the hype just made it all the more stupid and offensive in my eyes. The comparison is ludicrous. I so hated the first book that I refuse to read any more volumes in the series or see the movies. Real vampires do NOT sparkle, and women should aspire to more than just being with the hunk of their dreams. :shakefist

I actually do feel sorry for Robert Pattinson, though, like you do, Dasq. I actually really liked him as Cedric Diggory. And he is a very good-looking young man. He really is going to be typecast as Edward Cullen for years. Plus I've read some comments from him about some of the fans he's run across, including some under 10 years old, and it really does give him--and me--pause. :eek

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

Hopping on the Pattinson pity train. He's pretty OK in my opinion, since he hates the books and thinks Stephenie Meyer is a complete nitwit.

[Dasquian Belargic]

<object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" data="http://www.collegehumor.com/moogaloop/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=1923605&fullscreen=1" width="640" height="360" ><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"/><param name="wmode" value="transparent"/><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"/><param name="movie" quality="best" value="http://www.collegehumor.com/moogaloop/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=1923605&fullscreen=1"/><embed src="http://www.collegehumor.com/moogaloop/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=1923605&fullscreen=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="640" height="360" allowScriptAccess="always"></embed></object><div style="padding:5px 0; text-align:center; width:640px;">See more <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/videos">funny videos</a> and <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/pictures">funny pictures</a> at <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/">CollegeHumor</a>.</div>

[Nathanial K'cansce]

"Six! Six vampires! a-ha-ha-ha!"
-"Part of a balanced breakfast!"

Haa.

That being said, I have and will continue to avoid this crap like the plague.

[Droo]

I hate Twilight with a passion. I couldn't care less about sparkling vampires, a writer can play about with vampire lore all they want as long as they turn out a decent story, but what I cannot abide is Bella Swan. What a loathsome character she is; a grumpy, humourless, colourless, selfish, self-pitying, self-loathing, sulking little cocktease. She makes quite a deplorable heroine. And yet, these teenage girls scream. Oh yes, I forgot, Cedric's pretty.

[Taataani Meorrrei]

I don't mind the sparkling or whatever all that much. It's stupid but then again occasionally re-writes of vampire rules can be stupid. The problem is that Meyer's vampires have literally no weaknesses. They are complete Mary Sue characters that every 14 year old retard on an EZ-Board writes and thinks are the best ever. That's great and all if you're just writing bad fanfics and keeping them confined to your circle of friends, but how did this shit make it past an editor? How the fuck could this happen?

[Tell Cho]

My issue with the series is completely on principle. Vampires are evil. There are mythological reasons for each of their weaknesses. They were never described as being pretty in the original folklore, but they had some sort of magic or charm that drew and enchanted and entranced their prey - HUMANS. Vampires do not sparkle in sunlight, they burn. Even if I dislike Anne Rice for being the goth attention-seeker she is (or was), she at least made her vampire characters close to the mythological sources and more importantly, she made them at the very least readable.

One thing Meyer does capture about Vampires well: the complete sense of mockery of human love, desire, and attraction that they embody. Only, it's not creepy, but mocking in the sense of being absolutely childish.

I haven't cared enough to actually take a look at any part of the movies or books after my first simple information seeking.

And Droo, I may have to steal that statement about it being a brother's duty to help their sister develop taste - just in case I find my sister being the same way.

[Rutabaga]

I fear that the apocalypse is truly upon us. New Moon broke The Dark Knight's one day record by about $5 million. What a salute to mass marketing and the disposable income of teenage girls. It's just a shame that their collective taste is only in their mouths.


I hate Twilight with a passion. I couldn't care less about sparkling vampires, a writer can play about with vampire lore all they want as long as they turn out a decent story, but what I cannot abide is Bella Swan. What a loathsome character she is; a grumpy, humourless, colourless, selfish, self-pitying, self-loathing, sulking little cocktease. She makes quite a deplorable heroine. And yet, these teenage girls scream. Oh yes, I forgot, Cedric's pretty.

I have to admit that I don't always see eye-to-eye with you, Droo, but in this case I agree with you 100%. About halfway through Twilight, I was ready to drive a stake right into the heart of the book and then light it on fire for good measure. Because it's written in first person, in Bella's voice, it's page after page after nauseating page of just how beautiful Edward is, just how perfect Edward is, how cold Edward's skin is, blah blah blah :x. It really rankles me that as a character, Bella truly does want nothing more from life than to be with Edward. It truly is super-bad fan fiction gone horribly wrong. Bella really is a horrible role model for young girls. I was gratified to see an article online at CNN yesterday about mothers who were refusing to let their daughters see the movies, or they were at least seeing the movies with them and then discussing it with them afterwards, making it clear to them that the romance portrayed in Twilight is not reality at all, and that they shouldn't expect that kind of romance in their lives.

Believe me, I have nothing against romance novels as a genre, as long as they're well-written and tell a good story. Twilight fails in both categories for me.

It's why I really really prefer Charlaine Harris's Sookie Stackhouse books. Yes, those books are not perfect either, but they are much better written than the Twilight series. And Sookie is a much better role model, as far as I'm concerned. She's a young woman with a life, a brain, and a backbone of her own. Her life ultimately does not revolve around having a relationship with a man. She works for a living, struggles to pay the bills, and is very, very capable of telling a man to get lost if he does something to hurt her or betray her. Sookie's life ain't perfect, and I like it a lot more than I like Bella Swan's life.

The one thing I do give Twilight credit for is that, in this hypersexualized culture of ours, the relationship between Edward and Bella is chaste until they marry in the final book. BUT that completely negates the whole vampire genre. Vampires are basically walking sex, for God's sake, and that is what has made them so attractive to people over the years.

And I'm still noodling over how Edward manages to impregnate Bella in the final book. After all, the guy is dead, c'mon! :shakefist

And yes, I realize that I'm using unmasked spoilers, but from the tone of this thread I can pretty much figure that no one is going to care. ;)

[Rutabaga]

Sorry, just have to add a few more here:

<a href="http://roflrazzi.com/2009/10/29/celebrity-pictures-robert-pattinson-edward-cullen/"><img src="http://roflrazzi.wordpress.com/files/2009/10/celebrity-pictures-robert-pattinson-edward-cullen.jpg" alt="robert pattinson" title="celebrity-pictures-robert-pattinson-edward-cullen" class="mine_2763998464" /></a><br />see more <a href="http://roflrazzi.com">Lol Celebs</a>

<a href="http://roflrazzi.com/2009/07/29/celebrity-pictures-snipes-pattinson-stewart-wanted-see/"><img src="http://roflrazzi.wordpress.com/files/2009/07/celebrity-pictures-snipes-pattinson-stewart-wanted-see.jpg" alt="wesley snipes, robert pattinson and kristen stewart" title="celebrity-pictures-snipes-pattinson-stewart-wanted-see" width="400" height="267" class="mine_4775224" /></a><br />see more <a href="http://roflrazzi.com">Lol Celebs</a>

<a href="http://roflrazzi.com/2009/06/10/celebrity-pictures-pattinson-stewart-ate-movie/"><img src="http://roflrazzi.wordpress.com/files/2009/06/celebrity-pictures-pattinson-stewart-ate-movie.jpg" alt="robert pattinson and kristin stewart" title="celebrity-pictures-pattinson-stewart-ate-movie" class="mine_4363517" /></a><br />see more <a href="http://roflrazzi.com">Lol Celebs</a>

And finally:

<a href="http://roflrazzi.com/2009/08/11/celebrity-pictures-william-shakespeare-stephenie-meyer/"><img src="http://roflrazzi.wordpress.com/files/2009/08/celebrity-pictures-william-shakespeare-stephenie-meyer.jpg" alt="william shakespeare" title="celebrity-pictures-william-shakespeare-stephenie-meyer" width="450" height="536" class="mine_4884386" /></a><br />see more <a href="http://roflrazzi.com">Lol Celebs</a>

[Rutabaga]

OMG, this is priceless! :lol :lol :lol

<object width="512" height="328" classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" id="ordie_player_f57c441be1"><param name="movie" value="http://player.ordienetworks.com/flash/fodplayer.swf" /><param name="flashvars" value="key=f57c441be1" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed width="512" height="328" flashvars="key=f57c441be1" allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="always" quality="high" src="http://player.ordienetworks.com/flash/fodplayer.swf" name="ordie_player_f57c441be1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object><div style="text-align:left;font-size:x-small;margin-top:0;width:512px;"><a href="http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/f57c441be1/twilight-cycles" title="from Brandon Routh">Twilight Cycles</a> from <a href="http://www.funnyordie.com/brandon_routh">Brandon Routh</a></div>

[Darth Turbogeek]

I fear that the apocalypse is truly upon us. New Moon broke The Dark Knight's one day record by about $5 million. What a salute to mass marketing and the disposable income of teenage girls. It's just a shame that their collective taste is only in their mouths.


There cant be that many stupid people..... but the proof is right there.

WHY?????

[Jedi Master Carr]

I know I can't believe it made that much. Luckily, I think it will be very frontloaded. Probably will have a multiplier under 2 and do like 125 over the 5 days and make somewhere between 270-290 which is still too much for it.

[Tear]

Yeah! Go Twilight! Take that haters!

[Darth Turbogeek]

Yeah! Go Twilight! Take that haters!

Didnt say that even as a joke, we need to stop this stupidity! :twak

http://tantusinc.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TD&Product_Code=VAMP

NOT SAFE FOR WORK .... or your mind. Especially if you read the comments. Which made me laugh and gag at the same time

[Tear]

Wow, it even sparkles :love

[Mu Satach]

Seems an appropriate moment to share my buddie's blog about it.

http://boogiespeaks.blogspot.com/2009/11/new-moon-preview.html

Sums up my feelings better than anything I could write. It's a fun fast read. :)

[Darth Turbogeek]

http://www.spill.com/Movie-Reviews/MovieReview.aspx?Name=The%20Twilight%20Saga:%20New %20Moon&VideoId=475922

[Rutabaga]

Seems an appropriate moment to share my buddie's blog about it.

http://boogiespeaks.blogspot.com/2009/11/new-moon-preview.html

Sums up my feelings better than anything I could write. It's a fun fast read. :)

You know, I already had so many complaints about the series that I never thought about the absolute stupidity of a decades old vampire going to high school. Damn, he's right about that. Thoroughly and completely right. :thumbup

[Rutabaga]

http://www.spill.com/Movie-Reviews/MovieReview.aspx?Name=The%20Twilight%20Saga:%20New %20Moon&VideoId=475922

Must. Share. On. Facebook. NOW.

bwahahahahaha!!!! :lol :lol :lol

[Tell Cho]

http://www.spill.com/Movie-Reviews/MovieReview.aspx?Name=The%20Twilight%20Saga:%20New %20Moon&VideoId=475922

Must. Share. On. Facebook. NOW.

bwahahahahaha!!!! :lol :lol :lol

DONE!

[Mu Satach]

http://www.spill.com/Movie-Reviews/MovieReview.aspx?Name=The%20Twilight%20Saga:%20New %20Moon&VideoId=475922

"Get the two-ply!"

:lol

[Darth Turbogeek]

http://www.spoonyexperiment.com/2009/11/22/vlog-11-22-09-new-moon/

And this is just as good :D

[Yog]

http://www.spoonyexperiment.com/2009/11/22/vlog-11-22-09-new-moon/

And this is just as good :D

ahahahahaahaha! Best movie rant ever! :lol

[Dragon]

Anybody else see SNL's send-up?

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/clips/digital-short-firelight/1173548/

[Mu Satach]

If you ever find yourself living in the Twilight universe, with the only difference being instead of real vamps and wolfies, a fringe # of people who desperately wish they could be vampires or werewolves... give me a call, because you are now in Utah.

Seriously, I'm not joking. I grew up surrounded by Bella's. And the author is from down the street so to speak. :p

[Darth Turbogeek]

If you ever find yourself living in the Twilight universe, with the only difference being instead of real vamps and wolfies, a fringe # of people who desperately wish they could be vampires or werewolves... give me a call, because you are now in Utah.

Seriously, I'm not joking. I grew up surrounded by Bella's. And the author is from down the street so to speak. :p

You can claim refugee status in Australia, you know.

[Yog]

.. or in Norway.

[Jedi Master Carr]

Here is Kevin Smith's rant on it, it is great
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQ6W7wzTY0o&feature=fvw

[Lilaena De'Ville]

That Spoony rant is EPIC. :D

[Rutabaga]

That Spoony rant is EPIC. :D

Finally had a chance to watch the whole thing, and yes indeedy, it is EPIC! :clap

[Lilaena De'Ville]

I love the SNL 'Firelight' spoof with Taylor Swift, too, its hilarious. :D

[Darth Turbogeek]

http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/celebrity-pictures-dirk-benedict-ah-vampires.jpg?w=500&h=375

[Rutabaga]

http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/celebrity-pictures-dirk-benedict-ah-vampires.jpg?w=500&h=375

hahahahaha!!! :lol :lol :lol

[Rutabaga]

See, cats ARE smart!

<a href="http://icanhascheezburger.com/2009/12/06/funny-pictures-later-trust-me/"><img title="funny-pictures-cat-does-not-want-you-to-read-book" src="http://icanhascheezburger.wordpress.com/files/2009/11/funny-pictures-cat-does-not-want-you-to-read-book.jpg" alt="funny pictures of cats with captions" /></a><br />see more <a href="http://icanhascheezburger.com">Lolcats and funny pictures</a>

After 2 huge weekends, grosses plummeted this weekend, so it definitely was front-loaded to a certain extent. Plus being in theaters around Thanksgiving helped a lot.

Fair warning, though...we must suffer through all of this again on June 30th, when Eclipse comes out. :eek

[Darth Turbogeek]

See, cats ARE smart!

http://icanhascheezburger.wordpress.com/files/2009/11/funny-pictures-cat-does-not-want-you-to-read-book.jpg (http://icanhascheezburger.com/2009/12/06/funny-pictures-later-trust-me/)
see more Lolcats and funny pictures (http://icanhascheezburger.com)

After 2 huge weekends, grosses plummeted this weekend, so it definitely was front-loaded to a certain extent. Plus being in theaters around Thanksgiving helped a lot.

Fair warning, though...we must suffer through all of this again on June 30th, when Eclipse comes out. :eek

Actually the second week plummet was pretty epic at 70%. Third week was 67%. Looks like it's doing pretty awful repeat business and front loaded as all fuck.

[Jedi Master Carr]

I think mainstream audiences didn't like it at all. Also, it doesn't look like it has a chance at 300. It will probably do around 290-295. I am still hoping it finishes below Up.

[Darth Turbogeek]

I think mainstream audiences didn't like it at all. Also, it doesn't look like it has a chance at 300. It will probably do around 290-295. I am still hoping it finishes below Up.

Anyoen with a scrap of intelligence should utterly loathe that piece of outright shit.

[Dragon]

Alas, I can't remember which critic said,

"This is not a book to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown away with great force."

Twilight wasn't the target, but it might as well have been.