O Salem, Where Art Thou?! (A Joke Thread for the amusment of sick minds)

[Razielle Alastor]

Once upon a time...

There was a disgruntled Princess by the name of Raz. :grumble

Raz was bored. |I

So, bored disgruntled Princess Raz went to find a friend to play with and she found...............


PHOENIX:samSon-nuhvah Warlord Whyte.

:ninjaShe thought he looked pretty cool, and decided to play with him...

They played, and no one died.. (but there were many lost eyeballs) O_o then they became friends.


So then one day, Phoenix found Raz sulking and asked her the cause of her misery and she said....


:cry Salem has vanished into the nexus of RL! It's AWFUL!

[Lucianus Adair]

The mighty warrior-man looked at his sweet, little friend.

Oh, what a pretty face has come to me! :eee The man thought with glee.

See Razzy pout. Pout, Razzy, pout. Pout, pout, pout. :mad

A pretty sad face, Razzy, sweetcakes. :glomp That Salem-man is too serious. :| He needs his head checked. :headbash


See Phoenix think. Think, Phoenix think. Think, think, think. Phoenix sat down with his friend and patted her head, and thinked through his thoughts. He was a really good thinker of dastardly things.

:ideaSomething must be done! >D He must be punished for his ways! :spank

Phoenix thought again.

But what? :huh

[Razielle Alastor]

:o "Punished?!? Salem....?" She exclaimed with terror! :eek

"Oh, but we couldn't! Oh, but we shouldn't! He'll be mad, very mad.. :verymad"

"And then I'll be sad.. very sad...:cry"


But she started to think, and she thinked..
and she thinked...
and she thinked thinked thinked THINKED! until her thinker was all thunked out. |I

And then, suddenly Phoenix's plan began to make sense. :clap

Salem must be punished... but how? :whip

She could not do it on her own.. She would need help... :help

"Phoenix my Dove, to catch Salem, my Love, we'll have to get him in his sleep.." :zzz

[Lucianus Adair]

"He SLEEPS? What a fool. I hope he doesn't put his back to the door." |I

Phoenix thought again about what to do with the fool. The way his tongue stuck out when he thought really hard looked really, really, really....silly.:hurr


"He needs to be put in his place. He needs to know he's special...." :mischief ... "A-ha!" :idea

Phoenix bounced up and down and clapped with giggles and glee. :eee

"You..." He pointed at Razzy with a dainty flop of his hand. "...need to show him just how much you really care, lovey." :cat

[Razielle Alastor]

:headache Her head began to pound, pound, pound..

"Oh, but I've tried! That and this! This and that! What should I do? Go and buy him a hat?" :clint


"Tell me, Phoenix.. Should I write him a letter? Sing him a song?"

:whaa "I can't even think.. the list is too long..."

And Raz lay on the ground and kicked her feet, completely at a loss..

[Lucianus Adair]

"A declaration of ownership, my little rose." :love

Phoenix stood over her, a tall, tall tower. Mischief in his smile, his eyes, they did glower.

"We must be sneaky. :ghost Right under his nose." He crossed his big, strong arms, and held his head high.

"He must be marked. The circumstances demand it!" :shakefist

Marsuo rubbed his hands together. The thought he held in his head was cause for great personal excitement.

"I am saying, my child, the man must be...branded." :spank

[Razielle Alastor]

:eek Branded?! She couldn't even think of it! Her head fell in a slump.

But.. then, it might just be cute, a little red heart on the side of his rump? :mischief:love

:idea "Oh yes.. I like this idea!", she exclaimed with a sigh..

"Indeed, I like it.. Oh me.. Oh my....":yum