Adagio for Strings

[Zem-El Vymes]

I'd awoken to the chill of morning air blowing through the open window. I lay amid a pile of books in varying stages of openness, on a bed that I seemed to sink into. My Padawan learner lay beside me, a book pressed between the both of us. She'd read to me long into the night, and when the effort couldn't be maintained, we drifted to sleep in the midst of our surroundings.

I slid out from under her, easing her figure back to the sheets below, and gently removed the book from beneath her. I set to the task of arranging them back into a manageable pile. Once that was done, I gently roused her with a shake at the shoulder.

[s'Il]

As long as she could, s'Il had translated what had been written in the Book of Records, weariness eventually taking its' toll and sending her into a deep, peaceful slumber.

Images of her ancestors going about their daily lives so long ago danced behind her eyelids, and the Lupine took it all in with a sense of giddiness she had not felt since her first change. It was all so wonderful; men and women of both Greater and Lesser Houses interacted with one another and children - humanoid and vornskr - ran about laughing and barking. Scwhartzweld was alive once more.

And then a new feeling, of being carfeully shaken. The world before her began to dissolve into the light of morning.

Her brows furrowed; whether due to the sun's brightness, or frustration at having to leave the world in her mind, one could not tell. It was more than likely both.

She rolled to her side, her back to her master.

"I was having happy dreams," she grumped almost unintelligably.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"And you can be happy awake."

On cue, I produced four lumpy fruit from my robe's pocket.

"I didn't figure the pantry would have anything that kept, so I picked these yesterday. They're either deadly poison or delicious fruit."

[s'Il]

She sat up at the mention of food; albeit slowly. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, s'Il letting out a long breath before squinting at the fruit he held.

"Edible," was the mumbled response.

A yawn, and he Lupine shifted so that she sat in front of Zem while moving the covers to the side, letting her legs fall over the bed's edge.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Good, I'm starved."

I took a plug from one piece, tossing another to her as I sat adjacent to her.

"Forget the books, I'm getting these. Living on Cizerack rations is making my brain hurt."

[s'Il]

"You'd be surprised at how similar the two are."

She bit into the ripe fruit; it was tart, yet had a sweet aftertaste. Eating in silence, s'Il took a moment to look at the books he'd tidied up.

"We have to take the books.There's more than what I told you last night, you know."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Oh I know. I'm being facetious."

I took another bite, giving pause to regard the strange fruit.

"As long as we can fit it in the ship and still move. Think of it another way, this may not be our last time here."

I gave her a glance.

"When we get this whole mess past us, you know."

[s'Il]

Swallowing, s'Il looked to the open window and the view it afforded. Who knew when next she would be able to look upon her home.

"Promise?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

How did she expect me to promise something that was so very much in doubt? I thought about it. She just needed to hear me say it. Silly as it was, she knew what we were in as much as I did. It wasn't a white lie. Lies are at least written down.

"Yeah."

I clamped a hand over her knee, holding it there for a moment, and then rose to my feet.

"Some day."

I scooped up a few tomes that she hadn't made her way to reading, and hefted them up.

"Get something to eat. I'll start packing on the ship."

[s'Il]

s'Il watched him walk away, her eyes lingering on the back of his head until he was out of sight.

Standing, the Lupine took another bite of her fruit before going to work; sorting out the still useable articles of clothing and setting them aside. Unlike what she had worn the day before, she chose more useful, everyday fare. She was tired of wearing Cizerack maintenance coveralls, if nothing else. Unlike Zem though, she'd found herself thoroughly enjoying what had been stocked in the galley.

Her thoughts went to Zem. His 'promise' - to her - was not hollow in the least, and she fully expected them to come back.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I dug in and headed out, hauling the books down the pathway that led to the ship. It was a bit of weight, even for a Jedi, and I found myself breathing harder than I figured I should. It didn't slow me down, and I hopped up the gangplank to deposit the payload in what had become the lady's quarters.

As I set the books on the floor opposite her bunk, I heard a familiar squawk on the ship's subspace radio, which I'd left on in passive detection. It was picking up an active band, albeit barely.

[s'Il]

The selection of clothes that she'd folded neatly wasn't extensive, but it was enough to make her smile.

Setting the pile atop the large Book of Records, s'Il gathered them up into her arms and began following after Vymes.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I didn't hear her enter. Sitting in the pilot seat, I hunched over the radio, listening to the static-filled message as it cycled over itself. It was 24 seconds long, on a loop.

"...no food, running out of water...adrift...CSS Dysan...400 prisoners...adrift...dying"

[s'Il]

Smiling at the sight of the books that Zem had already placed in her quarters, s'Il set her own armload on the bed. Even if they had to leave today, she knew they would be back; when, she didn't kow, but the Lupine knew that they would come back.

Setting off to look for her master, s'Il had only to look as far as the bridge. Her brows furrowed as she stared at his back, catching the tail-end of the message before it began looping in on itself.

"What's that."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I didn't figure out that she was talking for another five seconds. I turned abruptly, looking up at her.

"It's a distress signal, on loop."

Turning back to the set, I increased the volume. The same voice, same message. Whoever was broadcasting, their voice sounded completely absent of hope. I set to work triangulating the source, pinging an active signal at the nearest celestial body to see the source. It was risky, since we'd also give ourselves away if the enemy was out there.

[s'Il]

Still watching him, s'Il listened silently to the repeating message. During the fourth cycle, she spoke.

"We're going to help them, aren't we."

His motions hadn't been lost on her, and though she knew next to nothing when it came to operating starships, she knew enough to recognize what he was doing.

And for the briefest of moments she felt sadness. She had thought they'd take a little time before leaving, but now...

She bit her lip in mild frustration.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I paused, sensing her frustration.

"What would you do?"

Silence would have filled the gap between us, but instead it was the signal.

[s'Il]

Blinking, s'Il silently rebuked herself for what she'd felt.

The message still played, and she stepped forward to lower herself into the copilot's seat.

"I'd go after them," she said quietly.

[Zem-El Vymes]

Of course it wasn't going to be easy for her to leave this place, and I knew that. She needed a little more time to let it go, at least for a while. Unfortunately, fate had a different hand dealt to us.

I said nothing, and squeezed her arm in understanding, drawing up the plank and beginning the pre-flights. Within minutes, we were skyward, heading to the stars.

"Don't forget my promise."

It sounded like such a shoddy consolation prize, coming out of my mouth.

[s'Il]

Watching as the blue morning sky faded into the inky blackness of space, s'Il gave him a ghost of a smile. She leaned partially across him then, one slender finger toggling the still-playing message off.

"I won't."

[Zem-El Vymes]

Leaving the embrace of Schwartzweld, we navigated out of the system. The coordinates pegged to the signal were relatively close, only one system away. Even then it was incredibly weak. We were able to come up on them within thirty minutes on sublights alone.

"There."

I pointed through the viewer at a rust colored speck, somewhere between a gas giant, a living planet, and the system's star. The light from the star caused it to pick up in our vision slightly. Still far off.

At the risk of drawing more attention our way, I went to the active array on the sensor bank.

"This isn't good."

[s'Il]

She was a fish out of water, and the Lupine bit at the inside of her cheek in a mixture of confusion and anxiousness. What was it that he could see, yet she could not?

"What? What's wrong?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Looks like a bulk freighter, back from the war. Confederate."

I panned a zoom over the ship, and it grew on a separate screen. The dome-shaped engine clusters at the back of the ship were raked by pock marks and tears.

"It's completely adrift. Looks like somebody attacked them, destroyed their drive systems, and left them dead in the water."

A sinking realization came over me, and I added.

"Our people. Well, used to be our people."

[s'Il]

Swallowing, s'Il regarded the enlarged ship. She could see the damage he was indicating. Her eyes were alert though, and the Lupine pulled her gaze from the screen to look out the viewport.

"What about the Empire? Are they still here? What if they're waiting to ambush any rescuers?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"I haven't seen anything, and I've been running active sensors for a minute. Either way, it doesn't make sense to spring a trap out here. This is nearly wild space."

Something unsettling dug at the pit of my stomach.

"It's as if they didn't even bother using enough firepower to destroy the ship. They were content to let them drift until they died. That's barbaric beyond thought and reason. For all we know, this could have happened a parsec away, and they've cold-drifted all this way."

[s'Il]

She said nothing at his last words. What was there to really say? If the Empire had seen fit to strand a group of people in space, than what else would they do? She'd already seen how the Jedi' had been dealt with.

"Can you tell if anyone is alive?"

If what he said was true - and they had been adrift from any distance away, she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to hear that answer.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"The sensors on this ship aren't the strongest. Hang on."

It took a minute of second guessing and tweaking to get the tolerances where I needed them. Even still, I wasn't sure. Half of it was due to the Cizerack system, and the other half was out there.

"It's a coin flip. There's livable temperature and atmosphere on the ship. This might be bio rythym here, and it might be noise. My best answer is maybe."

[s'Il]

Well. That only delayed the inevitable answer.

She scowled almost. That there was breathable air and a reasonable temperature was good. She still didn't relish the thought of possibly having to step around bodies. It was enough to make her draw her arms around herself in some semblence of comfort.

"How long till we get to them?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Two minutes."

I thumped the sublights, and took us in at the safest vector. With the ship drifting with no stabilization, it was going to be tough at close distances. Once we neared, I cut the subs, and relied on thrusters only. Giving quick bursts to the attitude control, I tried best to mimic the yaw that the freighter had. Beads of sweat started to form on my forehead, and I paused, sighing.

"Ok, I'm hooking up gently."

A short lateral burst from the thrusters crept us closer to one of the freighter's airlocks. Our own airlock mated up, and the accordion sheathing extended, sealing the pressure rings on the freighter's superstructure. A second later, a clank and an audible hiss let us know that we had atmospheric integrity.

[s'Il]

Was she ready for this? Was she ready to run the chance of wading through the dead once more? It had been one thing on Schwartzweld - there were no bodies to see, just emptiness. At the Temple it had been so horribly different; carcasses had littered the ground there as if they were nothing more than floortiles.

She looked to Zem then. Stone-faced and stoic, he cut an almost serene picture of calm.

Just like a Jedi should be...

Steeling herself, s'Il gripped the chair's armrests and levered herself to her feet.

[Zem-El Vymes]

She was up first, and I followed. I didn't have to be a Jedi to know that she wasn't comfortable with this.

"Wait."

I placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Let me go first."

Squeamishness of the dead (and who could fault either of us after what we had seen) aside, we had no idea what we would find on the other side. I palmed my lightsaber, putting it on my belt as I opened the yacht's hatch, and stepped gingerly through the accordion sheath. Tapping a frost-crusted button on the freighter hull, the door in front of me shuddered open with a heavy clank.

I almost vomited at the stink.

[s'Il]

If the stench was overpowering for him, it was beyond tolerable for her. Her physiology was at times a burden, and now was one of those times. Even though she was behind him, it was like being hit with a pry-bar in the back of her head. The olfactory overload was enough to make her retch.

The Lupine very nearly staggered back, screwing her eyes shut as one hand went over her mouth. Turning on her heels she bent over, dry-heaving.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I pressed on in spite of the wave of nausea. The lighting inside flickered on and off, and everything was in disarray. Cargo and waste was scattered on the deck, making walking a careful task. Turning down one hallway, I spotted a survivor. Soon, others stepped out into the hallway from other rooms. Not stepped. Shambled. They slowly stumbled toward me, and as they were close, I gasped. They were withered and emaciated walking, more walking corpses than men. What hair they still had was thin and loose. Their teeth were likewise. The skin was pale, clammy, and hung loose from their bones. Many couldn't even muster the strength to walk all the way. Some fell, and some had to be dragged along.

[s'Il]

With steely resolve, s'Il followed after him. It was a hard time; suppressing the urge to regurgitate the fruit that she'd eaten earlier that morning.

At the sight of the survivors though, the Lupine found herself clutching one of Zem's sleeves. She watched as what was left of the ship's crew shambled toward them. For a few brief moments she recalled an old holovid that her father had let her watch long ago - something with walking undead. These shreds of humanity that had been left for dead now looked much like what she had seen.

Without thinking, s'Il breathed out two words.

"... like zombies..."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I nodded to her macabre observation, and stepped closer. Pairs of weakened, atrophied hands reached for me, running fingers along me as if to see if I was real. The survivors started sobbing when they confirmed that we weren't illusions. Many offered repeated thank-you's with shaky, raspy voices. Some pleaded for food, some for water. A mother held her dead boy's limp body as she looked to me, wordlessly hoping for some miracle beyond my capacity.

It was overwhelming, and utterly heartbreaking. How long had they been like this? Doomed to starve unless their ship crashed on some planet and offered a brief mercy.

[s'Il]

The Lupine stared wide-eyed at what was happening around her and Zem. Most seemed focused on him, as she cautiously kept herself behind him. She was horrified; almost slack-jawed even, at what she was seeing.

Transfixed by the near-dead, s'Il barely noticed as a pair of arms clutched her right leg.

She had to stop herself from shaking free, and looking down she found herself staring at the emaciated figure of a small girl - barely four years old. Thin blonde hair covered her head, and a pair of green eyes, almost as big as saucerplates, gazed up to meet the metallic blue of s'Il's own.

She was frozen, and it was as if the world and those around her faded away as she was swallowed by the girl's green gaze.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Master Jedi, I knew you would come. Please help my son. He won't eat anymore. He must eat."

The woman pleaded with me on behalf of her boy. Her dead boy. His eyes stared glassily at nothing, head hanging back slack against his mother's arm. I wanted to reach out to her, but to do what? There was so much urgent need here, in ways I hadn't even seen in my service in the Clone Wars. This was an atrocity. My virtue and my disgust grappled for the forefront in my brain.

"Easy now. Rest. Everyone rest. You're going to be fine."

An old man collapsed into sobs, his rickety bones falling against me as he no longer had the strength to hold himself up. I kept him from falling, but the emotions were wildly contagious. Relief, grief, and every other raw feeling that had come exposed by this war crime was coming out, and even more people shambled toward us.

I looked back to s'Il. I needed something. Anything. What could we do?

[s'Il]

Lost in the eyes of the little girl clutching her leg, s'Il slowly reached down. Careful lest she hurt the child, the Lupine unlatched tiny, bony fingers from her clothes while in the same motion lowering into a crouch.

She felt almot helpless. They had cfound these people, yes. But now, what were they to do? If they were to take the survivors onto the yacht, would there even be enough room? And what about food, water, everything else?

Suddenly overwhelmed, she looked back at Zem from over her shoulder.

"I don't... " a thought occured to her then, "Is the captain alive?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Captain? Captain?"

I asked to the people, seeing if they had a response.

"Where is the Captain?"

A few urged me on down the hall, though most remained silent. Either way, it didn't take long.

I found his decomposing body lying on the floor of the observation deck, at the very spot where he'd blown his brains out. The corpse was maybe two weeks gone. He'd lost hope that long ago. What was keeping these people hanging on?

Nobody looked at his body. They kept their eyes on me. I think they'd seen more than enough death to last.

"s'Il! These people need food and water."

I looked back to her.

"We have to go back. To Schwartzweld."

[s'Il]

The Lupine's eyes went wide. Not from any sort of excitement, this was a strange sort of horror. Schwartzweld had been her people's homeworld. It was very nearly sacred to her. She opened her mouth - how could she even hope to protest something like this?

The little girl clinging to her tugged at her pantlegs, causing her to look down once more into those green eyes.

With a myriad of emotions playing over her face, she relented. Bending down, the Lupine took the girl's hands in her own.

"Where's your mommy, baby?"

A bony arm lifted then, tiny finger pointing to one of crumpled heaps lying in the passage way. A heap that mode no movement in any way. Again, a feeling of pity and revulsion swept over her, and s'Il pulled the little girl up into her arms before heading for the airlock.

[Zem-El Vymes]

By now the trickle was a river. In spite of the myriad of corpses I'd seen, there were still many more who were living horrors, people less alive and more simply waiting to die. They looked at us with unsure eyes, sunken and ringed from their trauma. Were we here to help them? They were too cautious for even hope.

By now it was time for me to stop recoiling in horror, pity, or whatever I was feeling. Every living person on this ship was coming to us, and hoping we had something good to tell them.

"We don't have much to offer you. We have no means to repair your vessel, and there are limited rations on our ship. However, we can provide safe transport to a hospitable planet near here."

This caused a clamor from the emaciated survivors. One woman fell down to weep, and no tears ran from her dried ducts. A ribbon of mucus hung from her nose as she sobbed, threatening but going nowhere. Several tried to embrace me, and I calmly laid hands on their shoulders to empathize.

s'Il was having a hard time, and I could feel her conflict behind me. Disengaging myself from the crowd, I turned back to her, squaring her shoulders up with mine with hands at each side as I looked at her fully.

"It's all I can think of. Temporary. We'll move them when we can. They need food, water, and care right now. Schwartzweld can afford all of that."

Looking back at the mob, I sighed. I still didn't know how we were going to tend to them all.

"We need to prioritize. The sickest, the most urgent. They go first."

[s'Il]

She defaulted to him as if it was second nature. To her, there was no need to do anything but stay at his side. These people were looking to him for salvation, and he'd offered it. She was content to stay as background noise. She would help and care for those that needed it.

Still holding the girl, the Lupine nodded.

"Maybe if there are any left strong enough, they can help us."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Yeah, maybe somebody the others trusted."

I looked to one of the survivors. He looked gaunt and weak, but he carried himself a little differently than the rest. He returned my gaze in kind.

"He looks promising."

Looking over s'Il's shoulder, I called out to him.

"You there, what's your name?"

[General Dan]

A survivor parted from the rest of the huddled mass, and looked to the Jedi with relatively-sharp eyes.

"Dan."

[s'Il]

At Zem's call to someone in the crowd of survivors, s'Il turned her head to look at the person he'd addressed. She frowned; by the way he looked she had serious doubts as to whether he would be able to offer any sort of help. Her eyes narrowed almost imperceptibly as she looked him up and down. Pulling an odd face then, the Lupine turned back to Zem.

"If you think he can, then fine."

She hitched the girl up a little more onto her hip, looking back to cast a less than faithful look to 'Dan'.

"Best to get moving," she relented finally.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I didn't pay s'Il any mind. She was being aloof and it wouldn't get us anywhere to crawl in her head for the here and now. We needed to get work done.

"Dan, we need the sickest survivors. Whoever needs help first. We'll get them out of here first, and come back for the others."

[General Dan]

Dan nodded wearily.

"You'll understand if there are limits to what I can do. There are a few infirms in the mess, mostly children and older people. We've been stewing rats for them, but even that's out now."

[s'Il]

Mortified, s'Il stared at the girl she held. Rats?! They'd been surviving on rats??

The Lupine could say nothing at the thought. Instead, she turned to walk towards Dan. "Take me to them."

[Zem-El Vymes]

Dan led us to the ship's mess, and the gravity of the truly bad cases hit us. These people were too weak to move. They lay against each other, moaning occasionally. They'd wasted away to the point in which even standing up and walking was too much exertion.

I stooped to the first, a young boy, and applied a hand to his forehead. Using basic force techniques, I calmed the child, and sought to instill a sense of well-being in him.

"Come now boy. We're going to get you out of this."

Gently, I cradled his head with an arm slung beneath his neck, and another at his knees, and carefully lifted him. He was dreadfully light, and I could feel his torso shiver with each breath that seemed to take more effort than was normal.

[s'Il]

If the stench in the corridors had been bad, than what was in the mess was unthinkable. The olfactory overload made her retch once more, and the Lupine shook her head to try and rid the stink from her nostrils. It did no good, and only illicited vacant stares.

She did her best to breath as infrequently as possible, and looked at the girl she carried. "Can you walk?"

A nod, and s'Il gently placed her back upon the deck. Close by, a pair of twins; a boy and a girl, were curled together against one of the walls. s'Il wasn't as adept in the force enough to be able to offer the kind of calming that Zem was able to, so she settled for simply picking the two up as carefully as she could - one in each arm.

With both hands firmly holding onto the tail of dark blue linen wrapped around the Lupine's waist, the green-eyed girl followed in silence as s'Il made her way from the mess and back towards the airlock.

[Zem-El Vymes]

We continued to work to get the serious cases onto our ship. The space issues soon became apparent, and we quickly began using up the room on the ship. Those who could sit, were seated on the couches and in the bunks in the quarters. Those too ill to do anything but lie were eased on the floor to the best of our ability. In want of pillows, we cannibalized linens off the beds and from elsewhere, bundling them up to cradle their heads.

s'Il didn't seem too comfortable with attending to the survivors' frayed psyches, so I asked her to drum up the water stores. It was only a few liters, but a few gulps for each refugee was a relative godsend that would help ease their minds more than anything I could say.

The boy I'd helped on the first run called out to me as I offloaded my third, and I knelt to him on the bunk, gently clasping my hand over his smaller one.

"What's your name?"

"Ishac."

I gently ran a hand along his thin head of hair.

"My name's Zem. Ishac, I need your help. This is my ship, and I'm the captain. I need me a first officer. Somebody to keep the crew in good spirits."

[s'Il]

In the galley, s'Il set about gathering as much water as she could. The little girl was still with her, silent the entire time the Lupine went about her activities.

The fruit that Zem had gathered was also pulled out, and she began slicing them into as many pieces as she could. Pausing after a few minutes, she reached down to pluck the girl up and set her gently on the countertop. Handing a piece of fruit to the child, s'Il continued cutting.

"What's your name, baby?"

Between bites, the girl spoke. Her voice was thin, quiet, and fatigued. Something disturbing coming from one so young. "Teagan."

"That's a pretty name. I'm Lok."

Another bite, "That's pretty too."

The Lupine smiled, then tousled Teagan's hair. "Not as pretty as yours though."

[Zem-El Vymes]

It took about twenty minutes to get a full compliment on the ship. By that time, we had them packed in about as well as we could, without causing serious discomfort. The rations of fruit and water were dispersed so that each had a little food and drink to hit their bellies. Not too much, because in their deprived state, they could very easily eat or drink themselves to death.

I wiped sweat from my brow, and looked at my Jedi companion.

"Looks like a full house."

Dan was in the threshold of the airlock, looking expectantly at us both. I turned to him.

"We'll get these people to a temporary safe harbor, and come back for the rest once we unload. Can you keep the others in good spirits in the meantime?"

[General Dan]

Dan's jawline tensed. Nothing more he wanted than to get out of this horror, and he had to draw himself back from begging to get aboard. After a moment of conflicting expressions, he reluctantly nodded his head.

"Don't be long. If this little hope is dashed, I don't think any of us can hold out."

[s'Il]

Teagan had remained her shadow for the entire time it took to get everyone situated, and s'Il found herself growing accustomed to being followed around by the little girl. Idly she wondered if this was how Zem felt, sometimes.

"We won't be long," she assured Dan, addressing him directly for the first time.

[General Dan]

"Please don't be."

There wasn't an edge or malice in the reply. Just a calm plea.

Dan nodded, stepped back from the threshold, and hit the switch to seal the bulkhead. People behind him wailed in protest at the ship leaving, but as the doors sealed, Dan could be seen turning to the crowd, raising his palms as if to demand they wait just a little longer.

[s'Il]

The sight before the airlock closed was enough to make s'Il turn away, her eyes resting on the top of Teagan's head.

And then it all rushed in on her; the events of the day so far inundating her mercilessly. The worst of it all was that it was not over - they still needed to come back for the rest. For a few brief seconds the Lupine felt herself becoming overwhelmed, but she pushed the feelings aside while taking Teagan by the hand and leading her deeper into the yacht.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I sealed the bulkhead on our end, and as the atmo seals hissed shut, I cut the umbilical, and gave a gentle push from the thrusters, easing us away from the derelict. s'Il was bonding with Teagan, or at least trying to keep it together.

I sighed, closed my eyes for a few moments, ran my hands down my face, and engaged the sublights, taking us back to Schwartzweld.

"Who wants to hear a song?"

How ludicrous. I was actually asking something like this, but what was I to do? There wasn't a response, but I started singing anyway. I don't even remember where I'd picked the songs up. They were various folksy tunes I'd had passed along from digging trenches on a few dozen contested worlds in the Clone Wars. They all had a kiddish appeal and were generally upbeat, if not darker overtones. It was all I knew to do as I was slaved to the helm.

[s'Il]

The trip back to Schwartzweld seemed to take no time at all. Surprising to s'Il, as she'd expected the ordeal of being in such close quarters with a group of near-dying survivors to be almost unbearable for the stench alone. Slumping against the bulkhead that seperated the bridge from the rest of the sip, she let herself slide down to a crouch.

She'd known that being a Jedi would entail helping others, but the Lupine in her screamed at having to be subjected to such conditions; to be surrounded by such filth. And there was a small bit of shame to be felt as she listened to the sound of Zem's voice carry through the ship. It served as a reminder as to who he was - who she wanted to be.

Her eyes lifted from the deck to travel over the survivors. It was strange, how it seemed the lines on there faces had become less severe. Even some of the younger children were moving about with a little more strength. Even Teagan, who s'Il noticed still stayed within a close distance to her, had more energy.

The Lupine even thought she saw smiles on a few faces.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I continued singing as we entered orbit around Schwartzweld and began our descent. By now, the mood had lifted noticably. First the survivors, then s'Il herself. I was cautious, but it was an improvement. We still had so far to go. After we rescued these people, where would they go from here? We couldn't simply leave them to be here, but getting them elsewhere would be an immense challenge.

I paused from my singing, my throat a little dry. It was a lot to think over.

"Almost there." I told my passengers, as I plunged into the atmosphere.

[s'Il]

As the yacht hit atmo, s'Il steadied herself with a hand to the deck. Still crouched, she bit her lip in thought before rising up carefully. Sending one last look out over the collection of bodies littering the passageways of the ship, she turned on her heel, taking a step through the hatchway that led onto the bridge.

Through the viewport, the Lupine could see the continents of Schwartzweld take shape, coastlines becoming more discernable. One hand resting on the back of Zem's chair, she pointed out a small island.

"Land there - Koenohg'sihg. House Richter had a stronghold there. It's large enough to house everybody."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I followed her instructions, carefully putting down in an open courtyard on the island citadel. No sooner did the struts bounce upon touchdown than I flipped the systems to idle and lowered the plank.

"Alright, we're at a temporary shelter. Listen to my friend s'Ilancy for what to do. We have to quickly leave you, but we will return with the others."

As I let her speak to them about what to do 'in her house', I helped the first few down the plank, leading them to a comfortable shade tree on a knoll.

[s'Il]

To be truthful, the Lupine felt that she wouldn't have to worry too awful much about wandering feet and greedy eyes.Those she was most concerned for were the children. Some may perhaps venture about, but House Richter's stronghold had withstood the ravages of time far better than House Aulflendte's simple home.

Anything of particular interest; the library, the armory, the chambers of the Rei'dulf; all of those weren't easily accessible. At least for these people. They might've ben regaining their strength butnot enough to where they were able to get in anywhere that they weren't supposed to.

Offloading the survivors was a much easier effort than when they were being carried aboard, and s'Il spoke in crisp tones as she explained what was to be done.

The warm sun was inviting, and the Lupine let her toes curl into the wild grass - she still had neglected to put on her boots - as she finished.

A momentary pause later, she looked to Vymes, unsure of what to do now. speaking.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"In your condition, you need to be careful. You're famished and dehydrated, but if you eat and drink too much, you could do yourselves great harm. I ask that before anything, you wait for us to return. You've waited this long, so please try to endure a little longer."

The group murmured a little with protest, but it was muted. Hopefully they understood we were after their best interests.

"We will return shortly. Ishac, you're in charge now."

The gaunt little boy nodded his head in response, and weakly saluted to me.

For lack of anything further, I turned back, and went into the ship again. I quickly got seated, and prepared to lift off. I didn't have time to be introspective.

[s'Il]

She'd said all that needed to be said, and with Zem's parting words it seemed as though any other instructions of any kind would be useless.

And so she followed her master back into the yacht. Teagan was hot on her heels, and the Lupine made no motions to quell the girl's desires. She herself was in need of some sort of companionship, and until she was able to be alone with Zem, it was Teagan that would be her companion.

Stopping at the top of the boarding ramp, s'Il looked out over the ramparts of House Richter's citadel, the survivors, and the sunlit courtyard.

With the girl at her side, tiny hands clutching the hanging half-skirt wrapped around the Lupine's waist, she depressed the button that would bring up the ramp.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I looked back to see that we had a passenger. I wasn't about to argue with s'Il on this in front of the girl, but we needed room for the others. I said nothing, and lifted the yacht skyward, back up through the atmosphere toward space. My entire routine was on automatic pilot. I was vaguely aware that I was even flying the ship, until I was back in view of the freighter again.

[s'Il]

There was something; a feeling of mild disapproval?

It was coming from Zem, and s'Il instantly found herself feeling in the wrong over... something. She pulled in a breath through clenched teeth, having sent the little girl into the galley to prepare more water rations.

Now, as they approached the freighter, the Lupine carefully stood behind the copilot's seat, both hands resting atop it.

Her eyes weren't on the wreckage however; they were on Zem.

Finally she broke the silence, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I've done something wrong," she started in a half question.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"No." I insisted, and continued toward the freighter.

"It's fine."

[s'Il]

She looked away then, out the side of the viewport before going on.

"But I felt disapproval... "

[Zem-El Vymes]

I turned to face her, and kept my voice low.

"We can talk about this later. Right now, the only thing I care about, up or down, is getting these people out of here. Don't worry about what I'm feeling."

[s'Il]

The tone in his voice took her off gaurd. Involuntarily, her ears tiked back; a habit she'd garnered from her vornskr form, and she clenched her jaw tight.

Turning on her heel, the Lupine left his presence with a parting, "Yes Master."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I let her leave the cockpit, and sighed, rubbing my temples as we approached. Something on the instrument screen caught my eye as I looked away from the view.

"What?"

I brought up a few readings, and confirmed my suspicions. It looked like the drift path the freighter was on wasn't stable. The gas giant they'd passed had given enough of a tug to put the drift on course for the system's star.

Suddenly, we had even less time for these people than I thought. I gathered my wits, and thumped the drive, dumping extra power to the subs as we sped up our approach.

[s'Il]

Making sure that Teagan was safe in the galley, s'Il smiled at her. The girl had done a good job of preparing the water, and with a few last words to be ready for when the others were brought on board, she made her way to the airlock, content to wait patiently until Zem had them docked and ready to bring the rest of the survivors on.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I ran through the docking procedure in a blind rush. By now it was second nature, and I didn't have a moment to dwell on it. The moment the ship bumped and the umbilical connected, I was on my feet and hitting the hatch.

"We gotta go. Hurry."

[s'Il]

She'd felt the rushed docking, and had to place a hand on the bulkhead for support. The ship's jostling lasted all of two seconds however, before it connected with the freighter.

Zem's tone and the way he moved were enough to tell her that something was wrong, and of course his words didn't help to put aside any worries about his hurried state.

She pulled at the emergency lever, rewarded with the familiar hiss of the airlock opening. And again the stench hit her harder than any slap to the face could.

Eyes watering, s'Il followed her master in.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Dan? Where's Dan?"

I walked quickly through the milling group, already trying to swarm me and be the next to board. I spotted the familiar liason among the thrall, and took him aside.

"We have less time than was thought." I spoke low to him once I'd pulled him out of earshot from the rest. We stood along with s'Il, near the airlock.

"This ship passed too close to a planet, and the gravity has thrown your trajectory. With the ship adrift and the engines destroyed, we can't correct the path."

[s'Il]

She felt pressed in on all sides; which in fact was the truth. Desperate to get onboard the yacht, the remaining survivors seemed almost ready to storm the two Jedi and take the one remaining functioning ship for their own.

She felt the first stages of panic, fueled by those around her, and turned wide eyes to Zem.

If these walking skeletons turned mob... the Lupine's chest rose and fell at a quicker pace, her gaze going then to Dan.

[General Dan]

"We're on a collision course?" Dan cautioned, knowing that it was best to speak low. His face looked troubled, and he looked back to the emaciated throng.

"The star?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

I closed my eyes, and nodded.

"By my calculations, in an hour, give or take. That gives us one, maybe two more trips, but we're still left with the lion's share still onboard when..."

[s'Il]

"What about a tow cable... ?"

Her fear was growing.

"Can't we just tow them back?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Even if we had a towing package, which we don't, I doubt the yacht could shoulder the tonnage. The shear would break us up."

[s'Il]

s'Il felt lost; helpless, unable to do anything. She looked from Zem to Dan, then back to Zem.

And then something hit her.

Something heavy. It struck her jaw with surprising force, and the Lupine was nearly spun around. As it was, she was sent staggering backwards, managing to catch herself on the airlock doorway as a hydrospanner hit the deck at her feet.

A chorus of "Let us through's" was followed by a surge in the group.

Too dazed to offer resistance, she found herself being rushed, floundering to regain her senses.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Stop!"

I threw out my hands, resisting against the crush of onrushing refugees with the force. Some at the forefront fell to the ground. The entire mass flailed about, wailed, and were a wrhting mass of misery.

"We can only carry so many at once! The youngest will go, then the oldest. The less time we squabble here, the faster we can rescue you!"

[s'Il]

Stumbling upright and letting go of the bulkhead, s'Il felt at the now tender spot on her jaw. She shook her head to rid her mind of the jarring effects, and knelt to pick up the 'spanner.

Her fear turned to a mild, low-burning anger at the attack, and the Lupine gripped the tool with a whiteknuckled fist. Only the fact that Zem had placed himself between her and the group stopped her from lashing out in retaliation. Instead she remained quiet, standing behind him and stewing in her own silent anger.

Her master's bid for control over the crowd was shortlived though, as not even the power of the force was enough to dissuade those still left aboard the derelict.

The wave of desperation swept over her senses, and s'Il acted quickly, knowing what was about to happen. Grabbing Zem by the neckline of his robe, she threw herself to the side, bringing him with her to crash jarringly against the bulkhead.

Not a second later another tool sailed through the air where his head had just been.

[Zem-El Vymes]

The crush of refugees engorged the yacht like a river, and we ducked out of the way. I pulled one frail woman aside as the push behind her became overwhelming. She barely avoided being trampled. Two others I saw weren't so lucky. I regained myself, and cut through the advancing refugees, pressing some of them back to the airlock.

"I can take two more. That's all I can do!"

[s'Il]

The words weren't taken well, as an angry shout was Zem's only answer.

This chaos was maddening, and s'Il had to stop herself from changing in front of them all. Such disorder was horrid in her eyes, and the Lupine despised it. She did her best to help the woman that Zem had pulled from the rush, indicating that she continue onward into the yacht.

Nothing was doing any good, and s'Il found herself pushed up against Dan as the sea of bodies pressed further inward.

"Control them," she snarled; an unnatural gutteral sound. Her anger had taken firm hold upon her, and a dangerous yellow sheen took over the normal blue of her eyes, "Or I'll control them for you."

[General Dan]

Dan had taken a bad rap to his head as he was pushed aboard, and he looked blankly toward the lupine as he put his hand to the bloody laceration. He opened his mouth to speak, and then closed it, at a loss for words.

In the meantime, the crowd continued to destabilize on both sides of the airlock. Everyone was screaming.

[s'Il]

This was no good. They were outnumbered terribly, and the instinct to survive was driving these people to deranged madness. And Dan was doing nothing. He only stared at her, a hand over a wound to his head.

Another snarl, and s'Il abandoned all forms of decorum. Any thoughts of staying human were swept to the wayside as she wheeled away from the lanky survivor.

Her change was swift, her body used to the transformation. With a feral cry that went from human to enraged beast. Her entire body shuddered as she turned from Dan, shoulders bunching up as her muscles shifted over a changing skeletal structure. One hand came to rest on Dan's shoulder - or was it a hand? In the span of two seconds what once had been slender fingers were now a massive paw that roughly shoved him further into the yacht.

A sheen of white fur spread like wildfire over her body, and the Lupine fell to her hands and knees as her back arched.

In the confusion, no one seemed to notice the immediate change, until the maddened howl of the white vornskr drowned out all other noises. A whip-like tail lashed back and forth, and the animal stood tall before the now terrified mob. Opening a tooth filled maw the beast snarled again, white fur bristling at her shoulders as she snapped her jaws.

This was going to stop now.

[Zem-El Vymes]

On cue with s'Il's change, I had drawn my saber, and the blue blade snapped to attention with a flash. What was I doing? We couldn't stay here, but was I really willing to kill these people if they tried to storm aboard?

"Get back! We don't have the room!"

[s'Il]

The monochromatic world before her was filled with terrified faces. She could smell the force aura around Zem. It calmed her somewhat.

And ever so slowly the crowd backed away. Some hesitated, but soon joined the others as the vornskr took a menacing step forward, her growl punctuating Zem's sentance with finality.

By now she was at her master's side, claws clicking ominously on the decking. She huffed a breath from her nose as the hair on her back began to flatten over lithe muscles.

What was left of the survivors now stared back at them through the airlock door - subdued for the moment. The beast sat then, waiting for Zem to make the next move.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I stepped back toward the yacht, and that's when she ran.

One woman broke from the huddled group on the freighter, and made a lunge for the doorway. I turned about as she was upon me, and my lightsaber plunged into her chest.

[s'Il]

The chaos before had been bad. But now this... this was something else entirely.

The mob started up again, and s'Il shouldered her way in front of Zem, who was wrestling with the skewered woman.

Slavering and snarling, the vornskr reared up, a massive paw slapping over the button that would seal the airlock. She bulled into Zem, pushing him and the woman back further as arms reached through. All but one were pulled away before it sealed, and as human and animal alike crashed to the yacht's deck, a single arm - sheered off just below the elbow - dropped to the deck at s'Il's paws.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I deactivated the saber, lying on my back for a moment as I just stared at the severed arm, and the woman dying on top of me. The wailing of the other passengers was at a crescendo, and some of them crowded around the woman I'd killed and wept over her. I just looked at it all, unable to move. I felt numb.

[s'Il]

As if possessed, the Lupine lumbered up to her feet, shaking her body out. Her tawny yellow eyes fell on Zem then, and she dipped her head down. Her cool nose met the skin of his neck, and she nudged at him with a whine.

He still had to pilot them back to Schwartzeld.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I vaguely recall standing up, making my way back to the cockpit, and strapping in. I didn't even look back at the freighter as we separated the umbilical. The people we left behind were damned. I turned the ship about, and resumed course for Schwartzweld. What were we to do?

[s'Il]

The Lupine left the group that'd gathered around the now dead woman, her claws making soft taks on the deck as she entered the bridge.

She made no sound as she came up to stand beside Zem's seat, instead simply looking up and out through the viewport.

A few seconds later and she'd reverted, her body shuddering once more with the change and leaving her to sit; tired and naked, on the deck.

Finally, she reached a tentative hand up to place it over his own which was resting on the seat's armrest.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"I didn't think to bring aboard any water or rations."

My mouth felt dry. I gulped, and tenuously licked my lips.

"They'll have to manage for the trip."

I kept my eyes forward. I made myself pilot the ship and nothing else.

[s'Il]

She bit the inside of her cheek. This behavior of his was worrying her.

Looking up at him, s'Il found herself staring at the side of his face as he kept his eyes on the stars ahead. She blinked, and let out a breath before bringing her hand back down to rest in her lap.

The time to talk would come later, and the Lupine was content to wait until then.

[Zem-El Vymes]

We made it back to planetside in what seemed a short time, and I put the ship down. In the distance, I could see the other survivors laying beneath the shade tree, and I drew down the gangplank. It should be all the explanation I needed. I didn't even get out of my seat. I just stared ahead.

[s'Il]

s'Il turned her head in the direction of the main cabin, listening and watching as the remaining survivors debarked.

A pattering of small feet heralded the arrival of Teagan, and the Lupine held up a hand, her eyes soft. With the rest of the passengers gone, s'Il slowly rose to her feet.

One hand gripped at Zem's shoulder then, and the other went to grasp his hand.

"Come on," she started gently, "we have to get off.

"I'll take you somewhere quiet."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"I have to go back."

[s'Il]

This made her pause, a confused look upon her features.

"Go back... ?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"If I have a chance to get the rest out, I have to take it."

I gestured vaguely to the refugees outside.

"Go with them. The next few hours are critical."

[s'Il]

Her eyes narrowed. "A chance?

"You said they had an hour. It took us thirty minutes to get back here, and it'd take you another thirty to get back there."

Her fingers tightened. "We did what we could; we saved those that we were able to save. There's nothing more we can do, Zem."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I turned to her slowly, and put a hand on her shoulder. My grip tightened.

"You heard me. Go."

[s'Il]

Her jawline tightened.

"No."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I raised my voice to her, jabbing my finger in the air as I did.

"There are two hundred people up there and I can't resign them to die! What does that say of me?"

[s'Il]

"It says you were too busy trying to save two hundred people instead of making sure the Jedi survive."

Her own voice had risen as she spoke. He was insane!

"If you go, there's a good chance you won't come back. Don't you see?! Where would I go? What would I do? I would have no one!"

Her eyes pleaded with him, and her voice dropped low, almost to a whisper.
"You're my master now. I need you to stay, and so do the people we were able to save."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I kept my eyes at the sky, away from her. What were they thinking? What horrors would they soon share? I closed my eyes and reached up, pressing open hands against the viewport. If my chest were a cannon, I could shoot my heart into space and knock them free of this certain death.

[s'Il]

The Lupine reached out then, both hands going up to grab one of his wrists and pull it down.

"Zem please. Come with me; I'll take you to a quiet place and you can rest."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"When one of the others asks you if you did everything you could to save the rest, how will you answer? What about the ones who can't even understand enough to know how to ask?"

[s'Il]

She still pulled at him gently.

"They'll learn to live with it, just as we're learning to live with the tragedies that we've gone through."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Then tell Teagan that, right now."

[s'Il]

s'Il wasn't ready to give in, and her gentle tugging was quickly becoming more forceful. This was getting ridiculous. He needed rest; peace and quiet. And still he was insisting on going back to fight a losing battle?! Why couldn't he see that? What was he telling himself, what lies was he trying so desperately believe? Those people had no chance no matter what.

Her voice was starting to become desperate, almost paniced.

"You won't be any less a Jedi for knowing what you can and can't do."

[Zem-El Vymes]

And then, it hit me. She was right. There wasn't anything I could do. I knew the window of time would put me there in time for the ship to be terminally within the star's gravity wash. Even if I could make it, I wouldn't have the engine power to thrust away.

I reached over, and killed the engine, resting my head in my hands.

"Go see to them."

[s'Il]

Still unsure, s'Il let go of him and took a step back. There was a deep concern in her gaze, but she gave a slight nod anyway and continued to slowly back away. One hand reached out blindly to grasp the hatchframe, and with a last look to Zem, the Lupine finally turned her back to him.

It was hard; seeing him in such a state. It seemed like years since morning had broken, and she wished desperately that time could rewind itself and she could be reading to him once more from the books she'd taken from House Aulflendte's library.

A palm on Teagan's tousled mop of hair, s'Il and the small girl headed for the boarding ramp. The Lupine was still very much without clothes, but it didn't seem to bother her as she stepped out into the light of Schwartzweld's sun.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I stood, after a few minutes. My legs were weak, and I swayed, catching myself on a railing. I quickly doubled over and vomited.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

She felt more than a few stares on her, but s'Il brushed them off without a word of acknowledgment. The dead woman had been carried out and laid a short distance from the main group of survivors.

There was no sight of Dan; though the Lupine wasn't sure she really cared all that much. He'd not done much to help control the previous explosion of desperation earlier, and she found herself resenting him for it. Even just imagining the blank stare he'd given her during the confusion was enough to make her grind her teeth.

Her thoughts went back to Zem then, and she turned to look over her shoulder; he'd still not come out, and a pang of uneasiness went through her.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I made quick work to clean myself up, and the mess I'd left. I didn't want anyone to see it, least of which s'Il. Rinsing myself off in the fresher, I stared at my reflection with a hollow expression. A thousand yard stare looked back at me. I didn't like what I saw.

I left the ship without a second thought.

[s'Il]

She watched him leave the yacht, concern in her eyes.

Out of her peripheral vision she could see a few of the survivors pointing and murmering to others as he walked down the boarding ramp; no doubt spinning false tales of why one of their own was now dead by his sabre.

With a low grumble, the Lupine turned accusatory eyes to them while making for Zem.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Listen up."

I spoke to the assembled wretches around me.

"We will provide food and water on a rationed basis. No scrounging, no pilfering. You take as we give. In your deprived state, you may feel compelled to drink and eat too much. If you do, you could possibly die from the shock."

The group fretted and protested, but I didn't pause for them. I spoke with steel in my voice.

"There isn't any room for negotiation. Too many people have died today, and I'm not going to watch anybody else go."

Squaring toward s'Il, I spoke to her.

"Food and water. Where would it be here?"

[s'Il]

She had to recall what she remembered of the stronghold, having only really read about it in her books. Brow furrowed in thought, the Lupine looked toward the massive stone structure that rose up from the ground. The basic layout, from what she had known, had been rather simple in its' outer layers; the only complexities lay in the innermost sanctuaries of the armory and the chambers of the Rei'dulf. She had no fears of those being found by the survivors, but still there was a certain caution should these people unknowingly vandalize the citadel in any way.

"I don't imagine the water systems to still be working," she finally spoke, "but the stronghold was built partially over an inlet that runs into the sea. If I remember right, part of it runs through the inner courtyard."

She shifted her stance then.

"There were also large gardens and orchards towards the back walls. They're overgrown now, but I'm sure they're still producing fruit and vegetables."

Giving him a sidelong look, her voice lowered so that only he could hear. "If I must, I will go out for meat."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I was already on my way without a word. I paused only later, still within earshot of my padawan.

"Keep an eye on them."

And then, I was off to forage. Off to myself and my thoughts.

[General Dan]

Dan worked up the strength to get to his feet again, and laboriously walked toward the Lupine.

"What can I do to help?"

[s'Il]

She watched Zem walk off, a small feeling of confusion in her thoughts as her eyes stayed on his back. She wanted to reach out to him, to comfort him. After all, he'd said - not the day before - that they now had a stronger commitment to one another. If she couldn't be there for him in any time of need, what good was she? Biting her bottom lip, s'Il had to keep herself from going after him.

And then a voice spoke; it was Dan who pulled her from her musings.

In an instant her concern changed to minor annoyance, and she turned to regard the lean, weakened figure of Dan.

"Help?" she very nearly growled out as arms crossed over her bare chest, "... I think you've done enough helping for one day, mister."

[General Dan]

"What's your beef with me, exactly? Not that you've been subtle, but I haven't done a thing to you."

Dan's eyes glinted in the sun as he squared up to her. Despite his malnourishment and poor condition, he had steel in his spine.

[s'Il]

Undaunted, the Lupine narrowed her eyes.

"It's nothing you did; it's what you didn't do."

She ran a tongue over her incisors. Her mind was in turmoil; all Zem had wanted to do was help! And what did he recieve in payment? A woman dead by his sabre? It was enough to make s'Il want to lash out at anyone and anything. She held herself in check though; it would not do her training any good, and she would fail her master. Letting a silence fill the air between her and Dan, she inhaled deeply.

The hard lines at her eyes softened then, and her stance shifted. Turning blue eyes skyward for a moment, she breathed out through her nose before once more locking eyes with him.

Finally, she spoke. "My apologies.

"It has not been the best of days."

[General Dan]

"I think we have all been a little sideways since the war was over. Isn't that ironic? All the horrors come out of the shadows when we're supposed to have peace in the galaxy."

He looked away, distant.

"My wife is dead. My friends are dead. I'm asking why I'm not dead."

[s'Il]

With one last look in the direction that Zem had wandered off in, s'Il sighed. The sun on her bare skin felt strangely wonderful despite the situation they were all in.

Glancing up at Dan as she began heading for the great archway that led to the outer courtyard of the stronghold. "My condolences on your loss."

With Teagan still at her side, the Lupine maintained a steady yet slow pace.

"Sadly I have no answer as to why you have outlived your loved ones. That is yet to be seen, and I'm no seer."

[General Dan]

"It was rhetorical. I would fear to even ask if I thought there was an answer. And yet, I don't want to die. I feel horrible for not wanting to die."

[s'Il]

Passing beneath the arches, s'Il let her eyes wander over the ancient stonework.

"Self-preservation and the desire to live can be a rather strong trait in humanity."

It was a more or less idle remark, yet her tone and inflections held a strange lilt; as if she was inferring a difference between her and him. Which, truth be told, was the truth.

[General Dan]

"Some more than others, I think."

The same distinction, only turned around in her face. Dan was starting to think that there wasn't much of a soul in this warrior monk.

[s'Il]

She lofted a single eyebrow at that.

"We can't all choose when we die, but we can choose how. And it's that 'how' that defines a person."

A pair of statues stood on either side of the main doorway that led into the main entryway of the citadel; one of a man, and one of a vonrskr. Such a common theme shared by Greater and Lesser Houses alike. It made the Lupine smile.

While weathered by time and the elements, they still stood tall, guarding a now abandoned home. To her, they looked magnificient still.

"And just as important as how we die, is what we leave behind."

[General Dan]

"So how do you imagine you'll go?"

Dan looked at the surroundings around him, at the culture and art of this place. There was something to her behavior that was tied to this.

[s'Il]

She made a face. "Couldn't tell you. I have other obligations and... people... that keep me focused on staying alive."

Watching as Teagan skipped on ahead through the open double doors and into the stone-floored foyer, the Lupine went quiet for a few moments. The little girl's curiosity rememded s'Il of herself when she was young, constantly insisting that her father - her real father - tell her stories of times past.

"I suppose I simply haven't allowed myself the luxury of dreaming about my own death."

[General Dan]

"Your friend looks like he's carrying more weight than both of us."

Dan changed the subject as he stooped to help another refugee.

"And he shouldn't. No matter what happened as we left, he is a hero."

[s'Il]

"He's my master," she corrected.

A look over her shoulder; again in the direction Zem had gone. Her shoulders sagged at the thought of him, and she wished now more than ever that she could be with him.

"We were both at the Temple when the first attack came. My first master was killed... " involuntarily, a hand came up to rub along her right forearm, "and Zem and I escaped together. We've been with each other ever since then, and he so took me as his learner."

Pausing to pull a dropped linen from the stone floor, s'Il shook it out before wrapping it loosely around her waist.

"If it wasn't for him I'd be another corpse at the Temple, and you'd be
stuck on a ship heading into a star right about now."

[General Dan]

"Then why is his disposition so troubled?"

A dull pain throbbed to life in his head, and Dan recalled the wound he'd taken. He put his hand up to it, and winced.

[s'Il]

"I don't know."

Noting the look on his face, s'Il reached up to move his hands from the wound he'd recieved during the rush onto the yacht earlier.

"It is something he and I will talk about when we have time alone together."

Inspecting his injury, the Lupine furrowed her brow and ran a delicate fingertip along the edge of the gash. It wasn't terribly serious, but it would require cleaning. Catching sight of Teagan, s'Il was momentarily satisfied that the little girl seemed to be busy with a small gathering of other children and motioned for Dan to follow her to where she knew the inlet ran through the inner courtyard.

Another child darted in front of them on his way to the now growing group of young ones. It was easy to see that the children at least were recovering quickly; such new surroundings no doubt offered their imaginations unlimited wanderings.

"So... do you have children... ?" she asked cautiously as they stepped from the main foyer and out into the inner courtyard.

[General Dan]

The sharp eyed man shook his head.

"We were recently married."

And then, it started coming back to him. He stepped away from s'Ilancy and looked off at some meaningless thing. She could see his shoulders sag and rise.

[s'Il]

Looking away, s'Il stood awkwardly, staring at the inlet that was less than twenty feet away. She bit her lip; something she constantly did while nervous or in thought.

"I'm sorry," she very nearly whispered.

[General Dan]

Dan sank to his knees, no longer to even shoulder his grief with dignity, choking sobs as he propped himself up over the ground. Tears weren't coming, for he was too parched to cry.

[s'Il]

Showing compassion to a complete stranger was such a foreign concept to her that at first s'Il could think of nothing to do but stand and watch as Dan sank to the ground. She opened her mouth to speak once more, but no sound came out.

At a complete loss as to what she was supposed to do, the Lupine found herself kneeling in front of him. It was painfully obvious that she was very unsure of how to conduct herself in situations such as this as she wrapped stiff arms around him in an awkward embrace.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I stepped along heavily, making my way back to the group. And they had seen me coming. They were buzzing with eager expectation, looking to the food I had brought with me. I had nothing to bear water, but fortunately there were some small melons that were very watery. It should help them.

I paused, watching s'Il embrace Dan, not wanting to interrupt.

[s'Il]

She hadn't seen Zem approach, but the growing murmers were enough to tell her that he'd returned. She wanted to stand, to to rush to his side and stand by him.

However, the Lupine knew that to leave Dan would be considered rude, and so she stayed where she was as the survivors began to flock to Zem.

Resolving to spend time with her master later in the evening, s'Il spoke gently into Dan's ear. "Zem is back. Let me clean the cut on your head and then we can get you some food."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I set my payload down and immediately went to work tearing pieces of fruit into manageable bits that could be distributed. I didn't speak, but I kept eye contact with s'Il and Dan.

[General Dan]

"G-good."

Dan's voice wavered, and he recovered. He eased away from s'Il's embrace, nodding to her as he did.

"I'll help hand them out."

[s'Il]

Still on her knees, s'Il watched as Dan stood. She didn't stop him from moving back toward the group; if he desired to wait before taking care of his own injury, than that was his decision.

She looked to Zem then, her eyes locking with his. A feeling of relief washed over her, and she reached out as best as she could with her mind, invisible fingers reaching out to him.

Despite the fact that he'd spent time alone gathering food, s'Il knew he needed to be somewhere quiet. Again his words came back to her, that the two were now committed to one another, and she slowly rose to her feet before making her way to him.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I handed her two of the melons, and smiled thinly.

"Keep the portions small. One quarter pieces."

By now, the group had surrounded us, shambling forward for food. I broke a piece, and doled it out into four segments, one to each person.

"Eat slowly. You'll satisfy your hunger."

In spite of my demands, they desperately tore at their first meal in who knew how long.

[s'Il]

She worked quickly, pulling at the fruit and making sure each outstretched hand was given a piece. Fingers covered in juice by now, and her own hands now empty, s'Il idly licked her fingers, tasting the tangy leftovers.

[Zem-El Vymes]

We quickly doled out the rations. I insisted on Dan taking his share, and he eventually did. After only a few minutes, the entire cache was nearly spent. I'd thought it out well, and everyone got at least one portion. We waited a while, and eventually fed the "better off" ones a second portion. The demeanor had turned to delirium, and the refugees were now in relieved spirits.

[s'Il]

A few asked for water, and s'Il pointed to the inlet with a warning to curb their enthusiasm and drink slowly.

Munching on the fruit that she'd been given, Teagan held out in her free hand a small carving that she'd found. It was of a vornskr. With a smile creasing her face, s'Il took the offered carving.

"Where'd you find this?"

"Over dere," she took the Lupine's hand with sticky fingers and pulled her away from Zem, "C'mon I'll show you."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I stood as I watched the two saunter off, and cleaned up a few rinds. I made the rounds a few times with Dan to make sure that everyone was feeling well, and after that, quickly excused myself to forage again.

[s'Il]

Far removed from the sickly, sad little girl she'd first encountered, Teagan was now smiling and chattering away about all the treasures that she and her friends had discovered. It was strange to see her, her body still far too thin for a child her age acting in such high spirits.

Led through one of the open doorways that lined the wall of the inner courtyard, s'Il let Teagan pull her down a small hallway and into a side room.


It was mostly bare, save for a few shelves and stands that held busts. The marble flooring was covered in dust, but bare footprints had broken the uniform covering.

A group of children looked up as they entered, and s'Il offered them all a smile of reassurance. They had circled around a small pile of gathered trinkets that they'd found in their explorations, and the Lupine crouched down to pick through it.

A few more vornskr carvings, made mostly from now-dried wood; some carved in stone, and some jewely boxes. There were even a few gold medallions thrown in.

"Your house has lots of old things in it."

The Lupine let out a little laugh. "Well, it's not really my hhouse; it's a... relative's house."

"Oh. Well, it still has old things in it."

"It does." She rose to her feet then, "So I'll need you all to be very careful not to break anything, ok?"

Heads nodded, and s'Il turned to leave. A tug at the linen around her waist, and she stopped to look down at a little brown-eyed girl who held out a necklace.

"Can I have this?"

s'Il blinked. "Well, um, I -"

"I'll trade you something for it," the girl dug through a pocket in her pants and pulled out a small locket; the chain long gone. She held it out to the Lupine. "Please?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

This time, I drug along a wheelbarrow from the groundskeeper facility to the orchard, and made an effort to maximize my effort. Picking fruit let me keep my mind on mundane things, and I worked at a feverish pace, not even thinking about stopping and slowing down.

[s'Il]

Looking at the offered locket, s'Il found herself at a slight loss for words. The girl's brown eyes were wide as she awaited an answer.

"Well, I suppose... "

The girl beamed wide then, pressing the locket into s'Il's hand. At first the sensation of cool metal was a little startling, but in an instant it changed changed to searing heat. In the first few seconds of shock, the Lupine could only stare at the wisps of acrid smoke rising from her palm. And then instinct overrode and she dropped the locket with apained hiss. Holding her hand up to her chest, she clenched her teeth against the burning.

The children were left behind to wonder what had happened, and s'Il quickly made her way back outside at a brisk pace. Her head was down as she made her way to the inlet, and she carefully opened her fingers up to look at the burn that was now starting to boiling up in small pockets.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I worked my way down to the inlet, determined to fill a few jugs of drinking water. I paused at the bank, noticing a wood-hewn door jutting out of a nearby hillside. I set the jugs down, and headed toward it, easing the heavy door open with a creak.

It was musty inside, smelling of hardwoods and age. And something else.

[s'Il]

With her hand thrust into the water to cool the burn, s'Il closed her eyes. Silver; the locket had been made fom silver. It'd been a very long time since she'd been burned with that metal. She silently cursed herself; allowing such a thing to happen. But, how was she to know that the child's locket was silver?

She pulled her hand out to inspect the burn. It was still sizzling, but not as bad as it had been. She'd have to find a blade to cut it away lest it scar permanently.

Hoping that Zem had a knife on him, the Lupine waded across the stream to the other side where the orchards sat and set off to find her master.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I let my eyes get accustomed to the darkness. This place was a cellar. Hewn from the earth, to take advantage of the neutral temperatures, it was full of racks of bottles of a uniform shape and size, each with a caramel-colored liquid inside.

I approached one of the bottles, removed it from the shelf, and after a moment of untwining the metal bands on the top, worked the stopper from the top. It had a sweet smell to it, but also a bit of richness, almost like a woodburning stove's smell.

[s'Il]

Picking her way through the orchard, the Lupine could see where Zem had walked through. Her eyes traced the path he'd taken, and soon enough - after making her way through a row of trees - she spied the whellbarrow he'd taken.

He himself was nowhere in sight though, and s'Il gave a cursory glance around at her surroundings.

Where was he?

[Zem-El Vymes]

I tipped back the bottle and took a light sip. The liquor inside burned my tongue and throat, but it had a good bouquet, and went down well. I exhaled sharply after the first drink.

I took another drink. And another. It felt good to turn off my burned, raw sensibilities. I needed to not feel, or to feel something else.

[s'Il]

Brow furrowed, s'Il stood beside a tree and listened to the sounds of nature. Zem was nowhere to be seen, and she began to feel worry creeping up into her.

Her head tilted up then, and she sniffed at the air; she could still smell him at least. And the blue hues of his force signature - though fading - were still able to be seen. Hand once more held against her chest, s'Il set off after the ebbing blue.

It wasn't long before she came upon the wooden door cut into the hill. It was open, but only slightly. She could smell him in there; his scent was strong, as well as another much more pungent odor. One hand pressing against a panel, she carefully pushed the door open a little farther.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I turned at the sound of the door creaking, the liquid in the bottle sloshing audibly as I tilted it down. I gave her an easygoing nod.

"You found me."

[s'Il]

Her eyes adjusted easily to the darker interior.

"I did."

She frowned, reaching out to take the bottle from him. "What are you doing."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Just taking a breather." I replied nonchalantly, passing the bottle to her.

"Picking fruit is serious business."

[s'Il]

Lifting the bottle to her nose, the Lupine sniffed at it. She made a face at the smell before quickly placing it back on a shelf.

"You shouldn't be drinking that; Lupine spirits are a bit stronger than most," she took his head with both hands, ignoring the pain in her palm and looking him in the eyes.

"How much have you had."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I shrugged her off.

"Give me a little credit. I'm not a stranger to a little alcohol."

Gesturing to the bottle, I nodded.

"After the day we've had, you'd do well to have at it too."

[s'Il]

"It won't make anything go away," she countered quietly, her eyes going to the bottle.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"No it won't. But it'll make you laugh. If you wake up in the morning with a headache, it's worth it all."

[s'Il]

Her hand forgotten by now, s'Il bit her lip, suddenly unsure of herself. Was what he said true? Not once had Master Windu said that alcohol was acceptable. But, maybe each Jedi had different ways of dealing with their troubles.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Go on."

I grabbed another bottle from the shelf to replace the one she'd taken. Opening it up, I held it in front of her, awaiting her reciprocation.

"You still serve the light side of the force. The only caveat is that you keep remembering who you serve. After that, you make sure you're okay to carry on. While we breathe, we're still flesh and blood."

[s'Il]

Taking the bottle he offered, s'Il stared at it for only a moment before tipping it back. Swallowing, she let out a long breath, pulling a pained face as the liquor burning a trail of fire down her throat and settled in her stomach.

She coughed then. "I don't see how -" another cough, "- this is supposed to make anyone laugh."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"That's because you didn't see your face."

I cracked a grin and took another drink.

"I thought this was your local? You struck me as more of a firebrand. Don't have a taste for it?"

[s'Il]

"This is only the second time I've had Lupine alcohol," she admitted rather sheepishly.

"The first was when I was very young and my father was still alive."

Another drink, and another face.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"It's very similar to a drink I've had on Corellia. Called Whiskey."

I shrugged, and drank again.

"We drank well at times. Consular missions often required it per the custom. I was a retainer for Master Kenobi in the Corellian armistice, and I developed a taste. Alcohol greases the inhibitions, and allows for meaningful conversation, to a point."

[s'Il]

This made her look at the bottle she held for a few moments before tipping it up once more. The sensation as it fired through her throat was something she was becoming accustomed to, and the fire seemed to dull with each swallow.

Moving past him, she opted to lower her frame onto a bench. She stared away from him for a few moments, her mind going over his words.

"What sort of meaningful conversation?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Depends. Sometimes honesty. Sometimes, just good energy to diffuse tension. It's an almost universal bond between people who have little else in common."

I took another drink, and paused in reflection.

"Am I actually being nostalgic about the war?"

[s'Il]

A ghost of a smile, and she took another drink from her bottle.

"Aren't you too young to be thinking about war memories?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"I've aged fast in the past three years."

I sighed, closing my eyes.

"This is a trial of faith, you know. No Jedi has faced what we face. Not for over a thousand years. I'm holding out that it will make us better. Better suited to serve."

[s'Il]

She was quiet at his words, digesting them.

"Dan asked me if I ever imagined how I'd die. I told him no, and that I had obligations that kept me from thinking on it."

She blinked, starting to feel less closed than normal. "Do you think about your own death?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

I shook my head.

"Not once."

Pausing on that, I took another drink.

"I don't have designs on living forever. My time will come. That said, I don't ignore death at all."

I cracked a mocking smile.

"We're close acquaintances, after all."

[s'Il]

She matched his smile, and took another plug. Looking up into his eyes, it was easy for her to see that their hard edge from before had dulled; it made her smile wider.

"However close the two of you get, I'd like to think that I'm closer."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I wondered at her words, and how she meant them. Her, as in the Jedi? Or, her?

"Got a little hard to tell today."

[s'Il]

"'Hard to tell'?"

Her smile stayed, but confusion was easily seen in her eyes. "How do you mean?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Part of me is still up there, burning into nothing as we fall down the chronosphere."

I took a sidelong glance and shifted weight on my feet.

"I know there was nothing we could do on Coruscant but to get out with our lives. It was what we should have done. Today, I don't know. You were right on the ship. But I can't let them go. A moment here, and a moment there."

Letting out a sigh, I drank again, hanging my head down.

"I never thought I would doom innocent people to their fate at the tip of my own lightsaber."

[s'Il]

She stared at him, blinking slowly as he spoke. She wanted to tell him that it would all be okay; that it wasn't his fault, and that they'd done all they could. But, she'd already said that; many times.

Instead, she kept her eyes on him, scooting a little bit closer.

"Nowdays we all have to do things that we never thought we'd have to do."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"How are the refugees?"

I changed the subject, but relented on the close contact.

[s'Il]

"They're fine. Much better than before. Even the children are all playing and exploring... "

It was then that she remembered her hand, and setting the bottle between her bare feet, the Lupine inspected the burn. She picked at it with a fingernail.

"Do you have a knife?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

I noticed the burn, and pulled her hand close to inspect.

"What happened?"

[s'Il]

"One of the girls wanted to trade me a locket for a necklace that she'd found."

She stared at the wound as he looked it over, "It was made of silver."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Silver?"

I looked closer.

"Looks like an acid burn."

[s'Il]

"It might as well be," she sighed while craning her neck to look around their small confines for anything bladed.

"If I don't cut it off soon it'll scar permanently."

At the look on his face, she explained.

"It's a natural reaction. A Lupine can't touch silver... or cortosis," she wriggled the fingers of her hand, "or this will happen."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Seems a bit particular, doesn't it?"

I swiped her bottle, siphoned as much of the contents into my own, and the smashed it against the side of a nearby shelf, causing the bottle to fracture into shards. I found the most manageable of the lot, and picked it up. With my other hand, I gingerly poured some of the liquor onto her palm.

"Want me to do it?"

[s'Il]

Lofting an eyebrow, she gripped the side of the bench with her other hand in a white-knuckled grip.

"Be my guest."

[Zem-El Vymes]

I sucked on my lower lip, tightened my grip on her wrist, and gently moved in with the shard, working in short, quick motions to filet the charred skin from her palm.

[s'Il]

For the first few minutes she wondered why it didn't hurt quite so much. True, it'd been a while since she'd been last burned, but the pain of having to cut it away had been memorable. Strange, how this instance was far less painful.

With a mental shrug she put the thought to the wayside and kept her fingers still as he continued. Strips of burned flesh fell away to drop on the dirt floor as the blood from his cuts already began to coagulate. She watched through half-closed eyelids as he finished, and when he'd pulled the glass shard away the Lupine flexed her fingers, testing their mobility.

Satisfied, she beamed; it was a slightly lopsided smile.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"I think that hurt me more than it did you."

I tossed the shard away with a look of disgust.

"A strange allergy. What happened?"

[s'Il]

She felt relaxed, her mind strangely at ease. Was this what he'd been talking about? Using alcohol to gloss over the horrible events of the day and soothe their minds? Brushing an errant lock of blonde hair from her face, she let her eyes went over the bottles lining the shelves all around the darkened room.

"I told you," she idly repeated, "one of the girls wanted to trade a locket for a necklace she'd found. The locket was made of silver."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"And you accepted?"

I arched an eyebrow as I watched the wound knit up and heal. Returning to my drink, I shrugged.

"It took a lot from you," I changed the subject again, "allowing the refugees to put up on the island."

[s'Il]

"Well, she sort of took me by surprise."

The Lupine watched him pull from the bottle. She considered his words, mulling them over before answering.

"It had to be done," she finally admitted.

"Besides; it would be nice to see just a little bit of life here once more; even if it's only for a little bit."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"What will we do with them?"

I glanced out the door.

"Once they're back on their feet?"

[s'Il]

To this she had no quick answer. Instead she reached for the bottle he held, taking it and lifting it to her own lips. With each drink it seemed as though the firey liquid went down easier.

"I don't know," was her eventual reply.

And despite the subject of their conversation, the Lupine was feeling in higher spirits and she softly laughed at her own answer.

She rested her head on his shoulder. "What do you think we should do?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Leave them be. If we try to move them and find sanctuary, we endanger themselves, as well as us. For better or worse, we're wanted by the Empire on pain of death for who we are."

I thought about it.

"The alternative is to commandeer a transport to take them away."

[s'Il]

The thought of leaving them didn't bother her as much as she knew it should have. It was certainly easier to do than having to steal another ship.

"And us? How long will we be here for?"

[Zem-El Vymes]

"As long as it takes to make sure they're on their feet."

I thought about it some more.

"Not long. I have a suspicion that we're needed in more ways than liberating refugees from crippled freighters. Along with that comes a heavy burden. I'm just trying to ask myself how many other people we'll miss saving and have slip through our fingers."

[s'Il]

"Let's not dwell on the ones we couldn't save," she spoke quietly, eyes closed as she settled herself more comfortably on his shoulder, "I don't think I could deal with seeing you try to kill yourself like you did today."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"What are you talking about?"

[s'Il]

"By trying to go back to that freighter."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"There's suicide, and there's a dangerous task at hand."

I dismissed her appraisal of the issue.

"This goes back to my views on death. If the Force claims me, it will be my time no matter the circumstance."

[s'Il]

"I guess I still have a lot to learn then," she grumped, holding out the bottle to him.

[Zem-El Vymes]

"There is a very high chance that I will not live to see the end of this conflict."

I spoke to her in a neutral, matter-of-fact tone.

"I'm not going to make any excuses for my own mortality. It is what it is. If you're holding on to something, and you're not ready to go, if you turn down that corner, what will happen?"

[s'Il]

s'Il furrowed her brow at this, and suddenly any good feelings she'd had before left.

"I don't want you to leave."

[Zem-El Vymes]

"Here, or are we talking about life itself?"

[s'Il]

"Both I suppose."

It was a vague enough answer.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I took another drink, unsatisfied by her response.

"I can't stay here. It all goes back to being on the ship, and not taking off. More people will be hurt, not less."

[s'Il]

All of this she knew, and the Lupine let out a long sigh. In their time together she'd come to rely on him and look up to him.

She stood up then; a little shakily, but she stood nonetheless. One arm going out to support her weight against a worktable, she leaned in, placing a light kiss on his cheek.

"At the very least, don't leave me."

Straightening, s'Il turned to make her way carefully out and into the sunlight.

[Zem-El Vymes]

I remained where I sat. The kiss had thrown me off. I brushed my hand against my face as she left, staring off into the distance.

Sighing, I leaned my head back against the wall and closed my eyes. I was starting to understand my young Padawan a little more.