Coming to. (Invite only)

[Rayna Eclipse]

She stared wearily ahead at the flame dancing beneath a glass tube, its amber contents beginning to boil. She waited the neccessary moment before turning the flame off and removed the tube with two pieces of wood she had scavenged from the dirty floor.

Living in the lower levels of Coruscant wasn't the greatest of all lives she had had. Once she had been the most honorable Jedi.. but that was so long ago.

She poured the contents of the tube into a syringe. Anxiously she waited for the liquid to cool. It had only been since yesterday she had her last spice fix. Usually she got a fix twice a day, but that was always subject to what Zedrin said. She had got into a fight with him today, all she had was what she had hoarded over time. Enough to get through a day without going crazy.

A drop of a cool blue liquid brought the liquid spice to room temperature and it was now ready for use. Her skin had once been a light tone, mostly devoid of blemishes and scars. Now pock marks littered her arms. There was an awful scar on the back of her head that she tried desperatly to hide with her stringy and dirty hair. A small tattoo marked her as one man's territory.

She inserteed the needle into her vein and pumped the drug inside. Her sight blurred and her brain numbed. She leaned back and stared at the ceiling as it spun around.

[Rayna Eclipse]

Her head was dragging along the gravel and as hard as she tried to open her eyes she couldn't. She felt her leg being elevated, someone was pulling her by it. Her body ached as the stones beneath her grinded her flesh.

This wasn't real, this was a dream. This was a memory.

She imagined what the scene must have looked like should a bird had looked in. Jorshal Vuntana, her former peer, her former lover, gripping her ankle and dragging her through the hills to the abandoned mining site their master had took for his own. Southstar had referred to it as The Dollhouse.

Her memory had blacked out after that point, she didn't remember being dragged through the caves, the sharp rocks scoring her back. She remembered it was the pain that woke her up inside the dollhouse, the invalids staring ominously at her.

Jorshal stared at her face, he seemed distressed. It was nothing she could exploit, Jorshal did as he felt neccessary and she was in no position to do anything anyway. She knew she was dead the moment she accepted the mission to infiltrate the Sith Order. A shred of hope remained in her that she might live through it though. Maybe she's make it back to her homeworld and be a hero. No, she was dead. Dead already. Jorshal was going to have his way. She killed his master and friend, she deserved it.

A dark voice said, "I want you to do to her what you've done to the dolls."

A more sinister, wirery voice replied. "I owed favors to your master, not you."

"As his former apprentice I accept all of his debts, and expect all of those owed to him to be returned."

"Very well. Enter her mind while I prepare the surgery."

The last thing she remembered was the white heat touching the base of her skull.

She would never know for sure what had happened, not that she wanted to. Had she become a doll? A pitiful invalid in that dark cave on Corellia. Her memories lead her that way, they haunted her in the same dream since she found herself naked and cold in the alleyway on Coruscant.

If somehow she had been spared death, been given life by some miricle of the Force. It was not the life she wanted, she would rather die than continuing to give herself away in exchange for some spice and a place to get stoned in. Every night she silently cursed whoever may have saved her fromt he dollhouse. She silently cursed Jorshal for not killing her.

She groggily opened her eyes as the ceilig re-entered her view as she lay on the broken bed, the nasty sheet that hadn't been washed as long as she had slept on it. A blurry figure blocked the yellowed ceiling, it was a he, it always was a he. This one was an alien.

"[Are you Rayna?]" It said in Huttese as it bent over to take a closer look. It had pincer claws protruding from his mouth, big crosshatched bug eyes.

"[Yes.]" She replied in Huttese. She never broke contact witht he ceiling.

"[Good. Zedrin said you were a pretty human girl, seems I might get my money's worth.]" His cold exoskeleton touched her face and slid the straps off her shoulders. "[Hmm...]" He buzzed. "[You're a little beat up. You know that spice is bad for you.]" He chuckled. His laugh sounded like a thousand bees swarming into her ear.

Rayna rolled over onto her stomach, she knew the routine. After a few experiences she had grown used to it. She closed her eyes as the alien pressed its cold exoskeleton hands against her already scarred hips. She closed her eyes and faded out.

[Rayna Eclipse]

She trudged to the refresher across the stained and shedding brown carpet and stared into the mirror. She was very much overweight, the way the flesh on her hips sagged over her pants was disgusting. She could count her ribs through the skin, however, but for some Force forsaken reason she was overflowing at the hips. Another day of eating ice and comsuming spice to forget the bubbling pain in her stomach was in order.

She ran a hand through her hair, pulling out more loose strands than the day before. She remembered a day when her hair was a radient blonde shade, now it was as if it were tinted with grey. She stared at the sagging bags beneath her eyes, her cheeks were looking a little heavy too. Could ice make one fat? Maybe it was the spice.. but she could never give that up. It was the only excape life provided for her anymore. She could take up exercising, but her muscles had atrophied from her time in the doll house...

No she would not think of that anymore.

She ran her head under the water in the tub. It was cold as usual, she didn't have the money to meet the electic company's bills if she wanted to fuel hot water. She was lucky to have water at all.

Every morning was like this. A repeat of the one before and every day she prayed this life would go away.

---

Daytime was never her particular favorite time of day. The star that lit Corellia had a way of putting her in such a light that made her feel ugly to the world. Regardless, she had to go out. Meeting with her only friend provided the smallest bit of joy that seemingly made everything go away. A friend that was second to only the spice that ruled her life.

Sishma Ignig was a strange person, perhaps the only one Rayna might say had life dished out a worse plate to. She was trans-species woman, a former Twi'lek with thousands of credits invested in her body to become something that resembled human yet maintaining an aura of exotic secrecy that some people found arousing. Fourtunatly for her, trans-species women were a hot commodity for that certain type of perverted merchant and the sexually frustrated youth looking for something new.

Sishma made more money than Rayna could ever hope to and she didn't have a spice addiction to swallow the wads of credits whole before they rested in the palm of her hand. But then again living a life of torment and confusion, growing up within a racist and sexist Empire that wasn't afraid to persecute and having to endure hours upon hours of painful surgical operations had to have some benefit somewhere; assuming the galaxy might be fair.

They embraced on the street, the occasional annoyed business man flashing a dirty look for stopping in the middle of crowded walkway.

Sishma asked, "How was last night?"

Rayna replied, "I barely remember it, the spice you know..."

Sishma laughed a little. If there was one person who never openly condemed her for her problems it was her. "I got nothing last night, this month can be slow. All the merchants are at Coruscant for the trade conference. But hey, I'll deal with it." She glanced at Rayna, she looked angry and depressed. Practically calling out for someone to ask whats wrong just so she could tell them to frack off. She'd let it rest for now, perhaps a little cheer up might help. "Do you want something to eat? I happen to be starving."

---

Her eating issues were her own problem, one of the few that weren't announced in some public decree by someone with an attitude problem and and eye for spotting people with issues. Zedrin, her so called spice sponser and man who found ways to make her pay for it by selling her body on a nightly basis like some sort of elaborately and eccentrically dressed slave trader. Ironically, it was Zedrin that was on her mind. Their run in when she had tried to stand up for herself in vain had resulted in an awful beating that put her in more debt should any clients find her bruises and scars unattractive and demand a lower price. An increased debt was better than Zedrin giving up on her and calling in his owed money in full, money she didn't have. Girls who could not pay in full alyway met the end of a stun baton at the hands of a hired meathead from the local crime syndicate. More pain and having to deal with a withdrawel from spice was not desirable in the least.

Her eyes followed Sishma as she walked form the counter to their table, men and women looking on with curiosity disguised as disgust and contempt. Sishma sat across from her and began to delve into hre food while Rayna looked on.

Sishma said, "So what's eating you up?"

Eating... Rayna shook her head and rubbed her tongue against her inner lip. "Nothing."

"Now don't give me that crap, what's bothering you?" She said a little more insistant now.

"I don't know. Zedrin was giving me a hard time and now its eating me up. I got angry with him, I tried to hit him, and..." She broke into tears and Sishma reached for her hands, offering comoforting words.

If there was one secret Rayna held close to her heart, it was her history. She was once a proud Jedi Knight, she was disciplined, she was successful and she was loved. She had a great family. She had close friends.

She lost everything and it was all her fault.

Embarressment is like a little creature that claws from the inside, beginning with the heart. When it has destroyed you completly from the inside, it finally climbs out through you're skin and leaves you at the mercy of others. For Rayna, the creature had been clawing for years now and it took everything she had to keep it contained. When it did rear its head, she found the nearest excuse to cover it up. For years, her life had been one big excuse.

[Rayna Eclipse]

"I've paid Zedrin, so we're done here then." A dark skinned human said as he pulled his pants up to his waist.

Rayna said nothing and mearly looked ahead at the dented and yellowed wall.

"Did you hear me, girl?" He said again and frowned mumbling, "Damn spice..."

She wanted to feel angry at his contempt for her and her life, wanted to say 'I heard you and go frack yourself.' But she honestly didn't feel anything. Nothing anymore. Every night, a different man, not a feeling in the galaxy. She wasn't sure if he had even left when her head began to nod down as sleep overwhelmed her. Who cared anyway.

----

A bright light flashed in front of her face. It glowed light blue, but its core was pure white. It floated in front of her vision before she understood. It was her lightsaber. It weaved through the air as if it were taunting her. She reached out to touch the hilt, but before she could, another hand took it away. The light faded into the darkness.

"We don't want to force you into this." An old man said. She recognized him. He was a rebel leader against the Empire, not from the Rebel Alliance. No, they were only the lesser of the two evils. This was a righteous cause, one she was willing to die for.

"You know... the chances of getting caught, are..." A young man said. She knew him too. He always had an interest in her. Someone with a romantic interest in her... But she never told him her feelings because of her status. Jedi were forbidden love. "You might, I don't want to see you get hurt." He said.

She never had anything to say to him after that.

She wished she was with him. She wished she had someone who cared so deeply about her like he did. She turned it all away. She never thought life would come to this. Never thought that she would loose her track. She was sure she was destined for greatness.

She dreamt that she had just made love with him. That she had a fantasy life of an average person. She dreamt she was happy.

She saw the lightsaber float before her again, it lit the whole room like a guide. It was like it was telling her to follow.

She awoke still face down on the sheetless bed, the sunlight shining brightly through the window. Apparently the cause of her waking. She trudged to the bathroom and thought about her dream. It was strange, she usually didn't remember dreams anymore. The few she did remember, they were often things relating to her past. But the lightsaber was wierd.

She stared into the mirror. She needed to loose weight.

[Rayna Eclipse]

"Ooo... someone has a package!" Sishma said as she retrieved it from the postman at the door and brought it over to Rayna. "Care if I open it?"

Rayna looked up from her bowl of warm water, something she called lunch. "Not at all." She slurped the water from the spoon, ignoring the rustling of paper as Sishma unwrapped it. Occassionally she got a package from some obese and purtrid trader offering promises of a life of ecstacy with him aboard some tin can with a hyperdrive. This was likely to be his ex-wife's dress.

"What the hell..." Sishma said as she removed the contents. "I don't think its the usual, hon. This looks like ordinary white cloth."

Rayna didn't look up.

"Oh my gods... Is this a joke? It looks like some crude sex toy. Someone you know have a Jedi fetish?"

[Rayna Eclipse]

"Um, what?" She said, somewhat alarmed and staring at the lightsaber hilt. "I- I need to see that."

Sishma handed it to her, a hint of concern on her face. "Sure. Why the urgancy?"

She took it and studied it for a moment. "It's just..." A tear welled up in her eye. "I haven't seen this in so long."

Sishma looked even more curious now, slightly worried. "You knew a Jedi? Or even a Sith?"

Rayna didn't know where to go now. It was her lightsaber that she held before her. She hadn't seen it since she infiltrated the Sith Order. Did someone at home know about her? Was someone looking for her? Questions rushed into her head, she'd somehow known about her supposed past. Someone left a book with her, it was like a journal of her life. It was the only physical confirmation of her former life, the rest came in dream-like memories. Now she had this.

"It's... A friend's... You won't believe me." She stuttered. She didn't want to face up to this. "It's mine."

Sishma bit her tongue slightly and stared at the floor. She looked conflicted. "Rayna, are you stoned? Why would you set something like this up?"

She threw the hilt at the wall, denting it indefinitely. "I am not!" She screamed and put her hands over her face.

"Come here..." She whispered and embraced Rayna, pulling tightly when she tried to push away. "I'm sorry. It's just this seems a little... different. But it's ok." Sishma never believed that for a moment, Rayna's mind would eventually give under the all the spice. A nightly addiction was deadly.

What are we going to do with you? Sishma thought.

Rayna heard her.

[Rayna Eclipse]

Within here takes place the events of Dark Tranquillity (http://sw-fans.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=40116)

[Rayna Eclipse]

THey met at the same place as the previous night, though Rayna couldn't recollect that night, so it was a new experience for her. The woman was waiting exactly where Zedrin said she would be. She matched the description too.

"Good evening, Rayna." Said the woman in a suit, red hair pulled tightly back into a bun. She wore a strang gasmask to hide her face, or perhaps she didn't breathe oxygen. Either way, it didn't matter too much to Rayna.

"Um, hi." She had only been up for a few hours, she had such a strange experience the previous night that apparently involved this same woman. However she couldn't remember any of it, which could have been the spice. She didn't know for sure and not having done any spice before she left to meet with her client of the night, or now two nights, she was expecting both the interesting and the worst. "So is it your place or mine? I don't quite remember all of last night, otherwise I wouldn't be asking."

"Last night was mine, but this night its yours." She said and began walking. "Lead the way."

[Rayna Eclipse]

"It's not much." Rayna said, looking for an excuse for the condition of her home, if she dared call it that. "But clients rarely seem to have a problem with it."

"Have a seat, Rayna." The red haired woman said in a muffled tone through the mask.

She cocked an eyebrow and did as told, sitting on the bed, the white sheets folding beneath her.

"What do you know about the Force?"

"I- I-" She struggled as she looked for words to answer the startling question. "I don't know much more than everyone else, I guess."

"You got my gift?" She asked casually. "Well it was yours to begin with, I was returning it."

Rayna stared ahead blankly, looking for a question to formulate in the mess of her mind. Nothing emerged.

The woman reached behind her head and snapped a latch loose. The mask slid off and a familiar face glared at her with concern tainted with a smile. "Do you recognize me?"

"Yeah. Nadja." She whispered. "You- I- The first thing I remember after... after the dollhouse. You told me you'd be back. I- I never thought you would. What the hell happened, do you know how I got out?"

Nadja pursed her lips for a moment and spoke. "I don't know how you got away from the dollhouse, though I'm pretty sure you escaped somehow. You, Southstar and Jorshal are the only ones who know where it even is. One day my comm alarmed, the one we shared from our ambush of Southstar. I followed the signal, found you collapsed nearby in the outskirts of Coronet."

Rayna sat in shock on the bed. How did this happen? How could she escape, when.. "I don't understand. I thought- Didn't Jorshal make me like the dolls." A mindless invalid. Sitting there and used as practice dolls for the few training Sith that were allowed into the Dollhouse.

"You were. When I found you, you couldn't walk, like you forgot how to. You couldn't even chew food. I remember your eyes didn't even respond to motion." Nadja said. "I took you with me and fed you and kept you alive and somehow, you got better. It's unexplicable."

Rayna stared ahead, tears began welling up in her eyes. "Why- Why would you leave me here?" Her voice shaked. For once she realized she had someone else to blame for her rotten life. "Have you seen what I do just to live?" Her voice began to raise. "Can you see what spice has done to me? Zedrin said he found me when someone left me with him. Was that you? He said I was already hooked on spice. Did you do this to me? Why?"

Nadja bit her tongue as she chose carefully her next words. "You'll understand."

"Understand what?!" She screamed and rose to her feet.

"Rayna, I... I didn't do any of this to you." She said, her voice growing more and more sharp with each word. "I did not make any choices for you."

"So it's my fault?" She asked sarcastically. "Are you saying I chose to be a whore? Are you saying I chose to- to numb my mind with spice night after night?" She broke into full tears and fell back down to the bed, a hand over her eyes as she refused to look at Nadja.

"Rayna..."

"SHUT UP!" She screamed. "Just GET OUT. Leave!"

Nadja picked up her mask and placed it against her face, giving only one more glance to the broken and sobbing girl she once knew as a Jedi. She bit her lip as she snapped the mask into place and left quietly out the door.

[Rayna Eclipse]

"Rayna?"

She opened her red eyes and tared at the ceiling. She thought she had just heard Sishma's voice.

"Rayna, please!"

It was her comm. She reached across the table by her bed to find it. She glanced out the window, it was still dark. Maybe she had only been sleeping for a few hours, it felt like morning.

"Sishma?" She responded grogily, her mind still filled with Nadja's sudden appearance.

"Oh gods, Rayna!" She said worriedly. "They're- they were human supremisists. I think I was set up or- I don't know." Rayna realized Sishma was crying now. "They were chasing me and- and-"

Rayna blinked a few times still too much of a wreck to to think right. "Where are you, Sishma? I'm coming."

"I'm a few blocks away... I ran from my house. They tried to torch it."

"Ok, ok." Rayna said as she struggled hard to collect her thoughts. "I'm coming. I'll find you."

"FRACK!" She threw the comm at the wall.

She then realized she need it should Sishma try to get ahold of her again. "Frack!" She ran her hand through her hair. She didn't own a blaster and she knew she might need it. Human supremisists were notorious for their violence. She needed something to intimidate them with.

She flipped her single cahir over and pulled on the the leg. It was loose, but she couldn't quite get the leg out.

Something gleamed in the corner of her eye.

[Rayna Eclipse]

The supremisists had definitely torched the house. The smoke rose like a tower into the sky. Rayna clutched the lightsaber hilt in her hand and rolled it around. So Sishma started from her house, which was glowing in the night sky, and she ran.

The apartment complex was nearest to her place, there were people there, witnesses, and plenty of places to hide. It made senes to Rayna to go there, she'd start there.

She had ran the whole time, she ran as fast as she possibly could through the streets of the rundown suburb of Coronet until she finally came upon the apartment complex.

She swore. The place was huge, Sishma could be anywhere.

"I saw her over there!" A male's voice called from a few stories above.

Rayna acted instinctively and began climbing the metal stair way, jumping from platform to platform, railing to railing until she landed on the right floor.

Ahead and to the left. Her senses told her. It felt right.

She sprinted and rounded the corner to find three human males standing over the cowering and weeping Sishma. One had a blaster in hand, the other two had clubs.

"The frack you staring at?" One yelled as she looked on.

"Just-" He voice quivered. "Just leave her alone. Get out of here."

"You gonna do something cutie?" The same one taunted. "You best leave, now!"

"No." She said and realized her whole body was trembling. "Leave my friend alone."

"What?" He said and leveled the blaster at her. "This your girlfriend? You two frack at night? I said get the frack out of her, I swear I'll shoot you."

"No." She said and activated the lightsaber, the green blade illuminating the whole corridor.

"What's this? Jedi by day, whore by night?" He taunted, apparently unafraid. Not exactly what she was hoping for. "Get the frack out. Now."

Looking back, she wouldn't be able to explain what happened or how she did it. The Force left her long ago. She was sure of that. The green blade was a blur as it sliced through the blaster chamber, causing it to burst into a fiery explosion. Both of the other men found their clubs in two pieces, then their chests with a cauterized black mark from shoulder to hip. She kicked the one who threatened her in the back of the head and sent him to the floor out cold.

"Gods..." Sishma said from the ground. Awe momentarily replacing her fear and pain.

"We need to leave." Rayna said, her voice shaky. "I have the feeling someone will be able to help us."

[Rayna Eclipse]

"So." Nadja said as she surveyed Sishma passed out on the bed on her ship. "You're lucky I'm a telepath."

"I know." Rayna said as she stared at the floor, seated in a chair next to the bed.

"You're lucky I came back for you." She continued.

"I know." She whispered this time. Silence stood between the two for a moment. "I'm sorry for yelling at you. For blaming you."

"You're frustrated." Nadja stated. "I understand."

"No, it's..." She struggled to find the right words. "It's my fault. You're trying to help." Silence stayed for another moment.

"So she's a transspecies, and her client was a human supremisist."

"Yeah." Rayna said and looked up for the first time. "I think it was a set up."

"Probably." Nadja agreed and folded her arms as she leaned against a dresser. "So what now?"

"I hardly know." Rayna shook her head. "It's just not safe here anymore for either me or Sishma. I'm thinking maybe we'll try to get to the other side of Coronet... maybe to another city."

"You're welcome to come with me." Nadja offered. "Both of you. I could use a couple of shiphands..." She smiled.

She let out a breathe of laughter, hardly laughter actually. "I don't know. I'll talk with Sishma. But I don't want to leave her alone."

"I understand." Nadja said. "Anyway. I think I'm going to get some sleep upstairs. Are you going to stay here?"

"I think so." Rayna said somberly. "Good night."

"Good night then."