Oriadin
Jan 31st, 2006, 07:07:36 AM
Hello,
A few couple of months ago my girlfriend and I were having problems. She got cold feet in the relationship and moved out. She told me she didnt love me anymore and asked me to break up with her, so I did. About 4 days later she went out clubbing but didnt come go back home. Her mum called me to ask if id seen her. I hadnt. I tried to my girlfriend mobile but there was no answer, so I left a message. Probably about 11am I got a call from her telling me she was ok. I asked where she was, she said her cousins, but I knew that was a lie. Later that day I went out and when I got back I found my girlfriend in bed asleep. She woke when I entered the room and we talked. She was all over me and we ended up having sex. She then wanted to go back to her parents and I didnt know where we stood. We discussed all our issues and it came out that the night she didnt come home from clubbing, she had sex with someone else. She said she had sex with me the following day because she felt guilty.
Anyway, we sorted out a lot of issues and decided to give it another go. My girlfriend didnt go out clubbing anymore and we started making couple friends and doing more together. Some days I'd feel fine and really in love, other times I just felt really wary that it would happen again. It cut me deep and I was really struggling with it.
As it came up to christmas, my girlfriend went on a works do and didnt come home until 5 in the morning! I asked where she had been and she just said in pubs. That her work mates new bar owners and stuff. I didnt belive it, but I didnt push for the truth.
At the start of the year, my girlfriend started to keep a diary. She told me I could read it if I wanted so I read the first entry and left it at that. Id also started to keep a notebook of my thoughts and feelings, expressing the difficulties I was going through with the time my girlfriend and I broke up, and her sleeping with someone else.
One night, while round at my friends, she found my notebook and called me, asking if I wanted to make this work and if I fancied anyone else blah blah blah. I said I did and when I got home we had a long chat about it, and all was ok.
Next day I found some ash in the kitchen. I asked my girlfriend about it and she said she tried to burn her diary pages but she couldnt so ripped them up instead. I asked why and she said she didnt like them. I didnt want to start an argument so I accepted that and carried on. As soon as she left for work, I went to the bin, found the ripped up pages and put them back together.
I read that she had slept with a guy called phil from her work about three weeks ago. She said it was amazing and that she was falling for him. She had to wait 3 hours for him and while she was waiting, she text me to tell me she loved me and treasured every day with me.
In her next diary entry she went on to say how she had fallen for phil so much but she didnt want to jeprodise what she had with me, so had to leave her job.
On from that, my girlfriend had probably the best couple of weeks of our relationship. We'd made a big circle of friends, taken a trip to London and everything just seemed to be on track. Then I found out about all of this. I called it off with her but I keep having second thoughts. My family all hate her for what shes done to me. I dont feel angry, just gutted and dissapointed. We are still talking but she wants me back. Promises, things will be different and that she had decided before I read the diary that I was the one she wanted. Thats why she tried to destroy the pages. To try and forget what happend.
I still love her, but it feels wrong to get back with her after all she's done to me. My family will never understand and im not sure if I will ever be able to be close to her without thinking about phil. My head is just so full of thoughts feelings and emotions right now, I just dont know what to do. EVERYONE ive spoken to said I should dump her and move on, and sometimes I think, yep, thats what im going to do but then what if she really means it? What if things would be great forever more if I got back with her? I might find someone new, but what if they do the same? I tried to suggest to her that we break up, but try to find away to be friends, but if we are out together and I see a girl I like, or she sees a bloke she likes, how are we going to feel? What if we get drunk, get with each other and then I regret it the next day?
Im so confused, and my thoughts seem to change like the wind right now. So this brings a close to my over long post. Trust me there are a lot more details, but thats pretty much the important parts. I guess I feel an outsiders view would be welcome.
A few couple of months ago my girlfriend and I were having problems. She got cold feet in the relationship and moved out. She told me she didnt love me anymore and asked me to break up with her, so I did. About 4 days later she went out clubbing but didnt come go back home. Her mum called me to ask if id seen her. I hadnt. I tried to my girlfriend mobile but there was no answer, so I left a message. Probably about 11am I got a call from her telling me she was ok. I asked where she was, she said her cousins, but I knew that was a lie. Later that day I went out and when I got back I found my girlfriend in bed asleep. She woke when I entered the room and we talked. She was all over me and we ended up having sex. She then wanted to go back to her parents and I didnt know where we stood. We discussed all our issues and it came out that the night she didnt come home from clubbing, she had sex with someone else. She said she had sex with me the following day because she felt guilty.
Anyway, we sorted out a lot of issues and decided to give it another go. My girlfriend didnt go out clubbing anymore and we started making couple friends and doing more together. Some days I'd feel fine and really in love, other times I just felt really wary that it would happen again. It cut me deep and I was really struggling with it.
As it came up to christmas, my girlfriend went on a works do and didnt come home until 5 in the morning! I asked where she had been and she just said in pubs. That her work mates new bar owners and stuff. I didnt belive it, but I didnt push for the truth.
At the start of the year, my girlfriend started to keep a diary. She told me I could read it if I wanted so I read the first entry and left it at that. Id also started to keep a notebook of my thoughts and feelings, expressing the difficulties I was going through with the time my girlfriend and I broke up, and her sleeping with someone else.
One night, while round at my friends, she found my notebook and called me, asking if I wanted to make this work and if I fancied anyone else blah blah blah. I said I did and when I got home we had a long chat about it, and all was ok.
Next day I found some ash in the kitchen. I asked my girlfriend about it and she said she tried to burn her diary pages but she couldnt so ripped them up instead. I asked why and she said she didnt like them. I didnt want to start an argument so I accepted that and carried on. As soon as she left for work, I went to the bin, found the ripped up pages and put them back together.
I read that she had slept with a guy called phil from her work about three weeks ago. She said it was amazing and that she was falling for him. She had to wait 3 hours for him and while she was waiting, she text me to tell me she loved me and treasured every day with me.
In her next diary entry she went on to say how she had fallen for phil so much but she didnt want to jeprodise what she had with me, so had to leave her job.
On from that, my girlfriend had probably the best couple of weeks of our relationship. We'd made a big circle of friends, taken a trip to London and everything just seemed to be on track. Then I found out about all of this. I called it off with her but I keep having second thoughts. My family all hate her for what shes done to me. I dont feel angry, just gutted and dissapointed. We are still talking but she wants me back. Promises, things will be different and that she had decided before I read the diary that I was the one she wanted. Thats why she tried to destroy the pages. To try and forget what happend.
I still love her, but it feels wrong to get back with her after all she's done to me. My family will never understand and im not sure if I will ever be able to be close to her without thinking about phil. My head is just so full of thoughts feelings and emotions right now, I just dont know what to do. EVERYONE ive spoken to said I should dump her and move on, and sometimes I think, yep, thats what im going to do but then what if she really means it? What if things would be great forever more if I got back with her? I might find someone new, but what if they do the same? I tried to suggest to her that we break up, but try to find away to be friends, but if we are out together and I see a girl I like, or she sees a bloke she likes, how are we going to feel? What if we get drunk, get with each other and then I regret it the next day?
Im so confused, and my thoughts seem to change like the wind right now. So this brings a close to my over long post. Trust me there are a lot more details, but thats pretty much the important parts. I guess I feel an outsiders view would be welcome.